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Today, I was texting at work when my manager walked in. I quickly dropped my phone in the garbage to avoid trouble. Since I was working so hard, she decided to do me a favor and throw the trash out for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7741) - you deserved it (43395)
On 05/26/2011 at 1:04am - work - by explosiveBAM - United States
Today, I was doing a shit load of sit-ups on my mattress. After realizing the bed was squeaking, I heard my dad laughing very hard from the basement. He thought I was masturbating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7740) - you deserved it (10004)
On 01/14/2010 at 10:16pm - intimacy - by nooneatall - Sent from mobile version
Today, I inexplicably claimed ownership of someone else's fart in the subway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7735) - you deserved it (23421)
Today, I woke up extremely hungover. I couldn't find my car keys so I went out to my car to see if I had locked them inside. I walked back to the door of my apartment barefoot and empty handed, only to find that I had locked myself out of the apartment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7734) - you deserved it (29433)
On 06/19/2009 at 1:34pm - misc - by crap (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I tried to close my desk drawer by hitting it with my hip, like they do in the movies. Everything on my desk fell off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7734) - you deserved it (18922)
On 08/30/2011 at 2:30am - work - by rojin12 - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was just taking a wank with my laptop on low battery. Almost finished when my laptop died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7732) - you deserved it (36503)
On 01/07/2009 at 10:07am - intimacy - by Noname - United Kingdom (Wokingham)
Today, I bleached my hair. Not only did it fry, it also has a very noticeable green tint and because of the damage, I can't dye it again for a while. Now I keep getting asked "Why so serious?" by my friends. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7732) - you deserved it (20563)
On 01/16/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Torbay)
Today, my girlfriend and my parents staged an intervention, and have asked me to go to rehab. What they want me to go to rehab for? World of Warcraft. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7729) - you deserved it (49243)
On 10/25/2010 at 11:06am - misc - by leve80paladin (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I had to change my mobile number because I was getting abused by a guy, so I sent my new number to all of the people on my contact list. Including him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7728) - you deserved it (31663)
On 02/03/2012 at 7:48am - misc - by Jodie - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was stuck in what I thought was traffic on my way home from work. I started weaving in and out of traffic because it seemed to only be a few cars holding up the line. I get to the front of the line and I'd realized I just weaved through a funeral procession. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7724) - you deserved it (41713)
On 02/21/2009 at 2:34am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my wife told me she was very horny as we have not had sex in about two weeks, so I told her to do something for me to get me in the mood. She sighed and then went upstairs to get ready for work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7722) - you deserved it (30679)
On 03/18/2010 at 4:21am - intimacy - by Username - Sent from mobile version
Today, I woke up naked, duck taped to the wall with no memory of last night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7720) - you deserved it (21673)
On 07/14/2012 at 1:49am - misc - by tapeissticky591 - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I saw a girl walking to class by herself. I thought she was weird for not having any friends to walk with. Thats when I realized I was eating lunch by myself. In my car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7717) - you deserved it (26406)
On 12/03/2009 at 1:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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