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Today, I went to a nearby nightclub with some friends and the girl I've been flirting for weeks. We were having a good time until this girl and two of her friends got back complaining about some "drunk-old-perverts harassing them". It looks like my dad and his friends are having a good time too. FML

#7284485
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23399) - you deserved it (1858)

On 01/11/2010 at 7:28pm - misc - by hateskool888581 (man) - Mexico (Nuevo Leon)

Today, while I was using my computer, my cat ran up to the power strip, looked me in the eyes, and hit the power switch, turning everything off. She does this quite often. FML

#20116072
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23396) - you deserved it (4284)

On 10/14/2012 at 3:00am - animals - by stop it ninja - United States (Virginia)

Today, I painted my nails in the car. After I finished, I stuck my hands out the window to let them dry. When I pulled my hands back in there were live bugs stuck in my nail polish. FML

#21228488
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23396) - you deserved it (45215)

On 08/03/2014 at 2:49pm - misc - by ew - United States (Texas)

Today, while working security at the mall, someone shat his pants. The shit dripped all over the floor and escalator. I was the one who had to stand near the poop so no one stepped in it. FML

#8230374
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23397) - you deserved it (2183)

On 02/14/2010 at 12:07am - work - by mallcop - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was talking to my friend about my life and she stopped me mid-sentence and told me that my life makes her sad. FML

#4714
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23392) - you deserved it (2566)

On 02/01/2009 at 12:37pm - misc - by why... - United States (Michigan)

Today, I discovered my children had found my vibrator and buried it in the cat's litter box. FML

#19850668
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23392) - you deserved it (11129)

On 06/26/2012 at 1:13pm - intimacy - by Heather (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, after coming home from surgery, I discovered that the heating in my entire building had failed. I called my mom asking if I could come and stay with her for a few days. She told me to "think warm thoughts." FML

#20192758
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23392) - you deserved it (1520)

On 12/05/2012 at 6:27pm - money - by lonelyandcold (man) - United Kingdom (Solihull)

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why period blood couldn't be saved and donated to the hospital for transplants. FML

#19986009
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23390) - you deserved it (2105)

On 07/26/2012 at 8:46pm - misc - by Carrie G. (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my science class found out that I have OCD and that one of my rituals is to cough when others cough. This is going to be a long year. FML

#20191703
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23390) - you deserved it (3648)

On 12/04/2012 at 11:09pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my dad's recycling went out of control. He now keeps a calendar of my periods, just to remind me to recycle the cardboard from my tampons. FML

#20078344
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23390) - you deserved it (1605)

On 09/18/2012 at 8:42pm - misc - by disgusted (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my grandmother walked in on me watching porn on my computer. She looked at the woman on the screen and said, "I used to have tits like that, but look what having 7 kids did to them." Now I'm scarred for life. FML

#20488708
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23389) - you deserved it (36125)

On 02/01/2013 at 6:05am - intimacy - by Master Debater (man) - Australia

Today, a toddler's play ball rolled over to me in the park. I playfully pitched it to him as his parents watched from afar. The ball hit him in the face. FML

#3469
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23387) - you deserved it (3363)

On 01/29/2009 at 6:08pm - misc - by Noname - United States (New York)

Today, I finally felt well enough to take an actual shower after having surgery on my back. It took five minutes to stand up, ten minutes to get to the shower, and another ten minutes to get in. The pilot light went out in less than five minutes. FML

#14732721
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23386) - you deserved it (2064)

On 01/27/2011 at 3:24pm - misc - by brrrr that's cold! - United States (Colorado)



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