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Today, while I was working my shift at the store, my girlfriend appeared and asked to talk to me. Once we were alone, she burst into tears and started sobbing. Turns out someone's dad died in her favorite TV show and she wanted some comfort. FML

#19959059
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27575) - you deserved it (3267)

On 07/19/2012 at 1:36pm - love - by Mitch (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, I was enjoying a romantic cuddle on the couch with my boyfriend, when he suddenly decided to lift up my shirt, stick his face into my boobs, and go all Darth Vader on me. This included heavy breathing and phrases such as, "Amber... I am your boyfriend." FML

#20024327
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27575) - you deserved it (6762)

On 08/16/2012 at 11:16am - love - by Amberain (woman) - United Kingdom (Halton)

Today, I let my boyfriend finger me for the first time. Today, I also learned, after fifteen very, very long minutes of it, how to fake an orgasm. FML

#6731473
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27572) - you deserved it (5938)

On 12/13/2009 at 12:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my friends made a little game out of my OCD. They like to purposely poke one of my arms so I immediately poke the other one. They think it's hilarious and now do it constantly. FML

#21414073
88 comments

Today, a group of carolers was coming up my street, so I went out in the cold to wait for them. When they finally arrived, I waved and greeted them. They huddled up discussing something while pointing at me, then skipped my house. FML

#14306647
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27570) - you deserved it (4715)

On 12/23/2010 at 2:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. When she went to give me a blow job, I got embarrassed and told her I'd rather just please her instead. Now she thinks she's inadequate and I'm being a jerk. FML

#20132312
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27570) - you deserved it (17659)

On 10/25/2012 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was following a makeup tutorial on YouTube. The girl said to apply concealer to any "problem areas" on my face. When I was done, 90% of my face was covered in concealer. FML

#13653489
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27568) - you deserved it (5805)

On 10/30/2010 at 7:46pm - misc - by demaris (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my little sister put on some black eyeliner on my eyes. About half an hour later, my eyes started to hurt. Eyeliner never hurt for me; so I went to the bathroom to check it out. My sister wasn't using eyeliner. It was a black watercolor pencil. Now I have black bits inside my eyes. FML

#14430007
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27566) - you deserved it (6011)

On 01/01/2011 at 9:48pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I caught my boyfriend trying on my bra. He still has no excuse. FML

#19023542
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27566) - you deserved it (4007)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, my mom told my dad to get me extra absorbent pads, very loudly, in a crowded mall. FML

#13904254
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27562) - you deserved it (3506)

On 11/19/2010 at 9:45pm - misc - by Dammit... - United States (California)

Today, I received a call from the company I applied to, only to have my father pick it up and make fun of the man's accent. They won't call me back or take any of my calls, and my dad is completely unapologetic. FML

#19384586
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27560) - you deserved it (1950)

On 03/31/2012 at 9:00pm - work - by Bashit (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after having a pretty rough day, I decided a nice, hot shower would be great. Ten minutes in, the shower head apparently couldn't take the water pressure anymore, and it flew off and hit me in the face. FML

#19637913
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27558) - you deserved it (2060)

On 05/17/2012 at 5:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, the new girl told me that a guy at the back of the class was being creepy. I looked over and saw him picking his nose and flinging boogers at the girls sitting in the front. That guy is my boyfriend. FML

#21431826
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27557) - you deserved it (6359)

On 06/25/2015 at 3:16pm - misc - by sweetsixteenyay - United Kingdom (Caerphilly)



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