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Today, I was walking through my house when I noticed bits of plaster falling from the ceiling. Against all logic, I looked up, receiving a fragment directly in the eyeball. FML

#18336172
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20778) - you deserved it (8970)

On 11/24/2011 at 11:06am - misc - by swirkishly - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I had bad stomach cramps so I asked if I could use the bathroom. After half an hour, I flushed the toilet, it backs up and floods the bathroom. To make things worse, when I opened the door, I slipped on the wet tiles. FML

#2804
15 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20777) - you deserved it (2166)

On 01/27/2009 at 9:23am - misc - by impatient amy - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I received my first Valentine's day present ever: a dead mouse from my cat. FML

#8241571
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20776) - you deserved it (3221)

On 02/14/2010 at 8:24am - animals - by lex31 - United States

Today, my husband decided to be helpful and do all the laundry, including pre-treating all the stains. He felt that Clorox Clean-Up with Bleach would be the most effective. FML

#8374594
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20776) - you deserved it (3272)

On 02/17/2010 at 1:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my husband told me that occasionally I pick my nose while I sleep. I didn't believe him so he showed me the video he took of it. He wants to post it on Facebook. FML

#19995801
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20776) - you deserved it (2796)

On 08/01/2012 at 1:44am - misc - by Emily (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my older brother thought it would be hilarious to sneak up and scare me in the grocery aisle at the store. I screamed and jumped, knocking half the shelf's contents all over the floor. We're now banned from the only grocery store in town. FML

#20166242
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20776) - you deserved it (2616)

On 11/17/2012 at 1:42am - misc - by sarahhbear - United States (Texas)

Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML

#19511225
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20776) - you deserved it (2236)

On 04/22/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I posted a status update on Facebook about how much I liked the Season Finale of NBC's "Heroes". My hand slipped to the right and it came out as "I really love Herpes. It's much better than everyone says it is". I didn't notice for few hours. FML

#4774065
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20774) - you deserved it (38083)

On 08/24/2009 at 12:28am - misc - by NotThatKind (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to renew my driver's license at the DMV. Earlier, I was in a play and was still covered in stage makeup. I didn't realize that not all of it had come off until after my picture was taken and put on my new license. For the next three years, I'll be the guy with the dark eyeliner. FML

#18247557
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20770) - you deserved it (7943)

On 11/14/2011 at 4:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, after the fourth time telling my roommate I'm highly allergic to her scented products, I came back to find all 6 of our wall outlets using Glade plug-ins. They were set to high. FML

Today, I had to explain to my brother why he can't go on dates with my new boyfriend and me. FML

#19469205
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20768) - you deserved it (2094)

On 04/14/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by ProsserBabe11 (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter wore my favorite Christmas sweater to an ugly sweater party. FML

#20201801
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20768) - you deserved it (8790)

On 12/12/2012 at 11:05am - kids - by Saduglydad - United States (Texas)

Today, I got into a car crash, in my own garage. FML

#20643761
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20767) - you deserved it (40174)

On 05/05/2013 at 7:51pm - misc - by LilaTheGreat - United States (Wisconsin)



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