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Today, at work, I realized that not everyone in the office needs to hear my explosive diarrhea through the a/c vents that interconnect through the entire building. I think an email was sent around, describing people's reactions in detail. FML

#6016625
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26320) - you deserved it (2685)

On 10/26/2009 at 11:15pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was trying on some clothes in the store's changing room, when someone reached under the door and grabbed my purse, shoes, and pants. FML

#19511561
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26317) - you deserved it (2871)

On 04/22/2012 at 3:08pm - misc - by Gitana (woman) - Spain (Navarra)

Today, while I was babysitting my nephews, the 7 year old boy walked up to me and asked if I was a lesbian. I laughed it off. An argument ensued about my sexuality for a good two hours. I lost. FML

#2591
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26316) - you deserved it (3880)

On 01/25/2009 at 9:51pm - kids - by ThatsNotRight - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my boyfriend asked me to beat him up so he could look tough around his friends. When I just stared at him, he added, "Please don't break anything though. Nothing too serious." FML

#17845836
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26316) - you deserved it (3492)

On 09/27/2011 at 4:28am - health - by toughbf (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was approached by a policeman who asked me if I was the owner of the green Camry. Turns out my parents decided to teach me a lesson for lying where I had been by reporting the car stolen. They also wouldn't answer my one phone call. FML

#6836721
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26316) - you deserved it (8381)

On 12/19/2009 at 10:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend told me how I am too occupied with work for our relationship. Before we had sex I told my friend to call me in ten minutes so I can pretend its my boss and I would throw the phone away to impress her. He called me in ten minutes, but I only lasted five. FML

#717975
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26309) - you deserved it (85989)

On 03/31/2009 at 12:41am - intimacy - by Alex (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got a call from my younger brother's school to pick him up immediately. He had a test today and had the brilliant idea that by telling everyone he had head lice, he could go home. I had to leave work to pick him up, and now I have to take him to a doctor so they can verify he can go back. FML

#7570908
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26308) - you deserved it (2332)

On 01/25/2010 at 4:24pm - kids - by joshua (man) - United States (California)

Today, my car got stolen. While I was standing ten feet away from it. FML

#18440924
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26304) - you deserved it (6772)

On 12/05/2011 at 10:54pm - misc - by smileytheface - United States (Illinois)

Today, while trying to have a serious conversation with my husband about his drug use over text, he came home. Drunk. FML

#15169301
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26302) - you deserved it (8517)

On 03/01/2011 at 10:41pm - love - by thelunarwolf -

Today, I found out my friend swapped my girlfriend and probation officer's numbers in my phone. My girlfriend is wondering why I asked her permission to leave the country, and my probation officer said she can't wait to see me again. FML

#20054113
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26301) - you deserved it (4074)

On 09/02/2012 at 1:34pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was talking to my friend about my life and she stopped me mid-sentence and told me that my life makes her sad. FML

#4714
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26300) - you deserved it (2856)

On 02/01/2009 at 12:37pm - misc - by why... - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was on a walk when I ran into the woman whose kids I babysit. We had a quick chat, and I noticed she had just blown her driveway clean. As I left, I said "You did a nice blow job!" FML

#14481844
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26298) - you deserved it (13560)

On 01/06/2011 at 12:57am - intimacy - by babysitter (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I discovered that the more money I earn, the more my personal belongings break down on me. FML

#17274904
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26297) - you deserved it (2824)

On 07/27/2011 at 12:05am - money - by talwin (man) - Reserved



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