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Today, I was waiting for a call from a job I had applied for. When the phone rang, I ran as fast I could up the stairs, falling and slamming my shin on the way. The call? It was a woman asking me, "Hi, do you have time to learn about our lord Jesus Christ?" FML

#19324398
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21905) - you deserved it (4983)

On 03/22/2012 at 12:56am - work - by Atheist (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, as part of the treatment for my bulimia, my doctor informed me that I will not be allowed to go to the bathroom unsupervised. Meaning there will have to be another person in the bathroom with me at all times. I have a nervous bladder. I couldn't go if I wanted to. FML

#17977413
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21904) - you deserved it (12513)

On 10/13/2011 at 8:07pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I'm a graduate but still an unpaid intern. My daily work is folding letters and putting them into envelopes. The sad thing is, I actually enjoy doing it. FML

#16805369
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21903) - you deserved it (7159)

On 06/22/2011 at 8:36pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I have Hello Kitty band-aids on my nips because I dozed off while tanning and burned them extra crispy. FML

#21062623
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21903) - you deserved it (38751)

On 02/16/2014 at 5:23pm - health - by extra crispy or original recipe (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I caught a coworker at my new job staring at my chest. Trying not to rock the boat, I took him aside and asked him to stop. He insisted he was just trying to read my shirt. Our company uniforms don't have writing on them. FML

#19728226
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21902) - you deserved it (2565)

On 06/03/2012 at 6:41pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went to my hairdresser who promised me a haircut which "all the girls would want you" for. She gave me a combover. FML

#5819831
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21900) - you deserved it (3107)

On 10/13/2009 at 9:25pm - misc - by Chensticles - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out why my District Manager won't promote me to store manager; his wife thinks he's having an affair with me. If he promotes me, she will take that as evidence of the affair, and then will threaten to divorce him. FML

#20045096
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21900) - you deserved it (1339)

On 08/27/2012 at 8:09pm - work - by Mandi (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my new neighbor informed me with great relish that the house I have just bought is haunted because 30 years ago a man shot himself in the kitchen. I'm now paying a huge mortgage on a house I'm frightened to be alone in. FML

#17104871
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21899) - you deserved it (8268)

On 07/14/2011 at 4:59am - misc - by Boo (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my dad stopped me mid-sentence and said he wanted to punch me in the face and set me on fire for using the word "selfie". FML

#21243189
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21898) - you deserved it (37863)

On 08/22/2014 at 2:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my ex-girlfriend was supposed to pick up her things. I decided to take a nap. Thirty minutes later, I woke up with two police officers hammering on my door. They'd come to get my ex-girlfriend's things and said they were "watching me." That's the last time I date a cop's daughter. FML

#20170390
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21895) - you deserved it (2911)

On 11/20/2012 at 12:03am - love - by Chris (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend has been seeing another girl behind my back. The kicker is that he told her I was his lazy sister and had just moved in. FML

#20093138
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21897) - you deserved it (1753)

On 09/29/2012 at 1:38am - love - by thatonegirl.SBS. - United States (California)

Today, I moved back home after unsuccessfully trying to find work in Florida, despite living there for nine months. About 45 minutes into my 18-hour drive home, a TV station called me to offer me a job interview. I applied for that job over three months ago. FML

#19883197
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21893) - you deserved it (2025)

On 07/02/2012 at 10:22pm - work - by deweyd8855 - United States

Today, I was getting lunch at a fast food restaurant. My boss was in front of me, and in order to get on his good side I offered to pay. Instead, I got fired because I guess my boss assumed I was making fun of his salary, which I knew nothing about. FML

#19956354
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21893) - you deserved it (2623)

On 07/18/2012 at 8:41pm - work - by FOXYgrandpa441 - United States (Wyoming)



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