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Today, I was at a friend's party. Her neighbor and I really hit it off. We went off into the woods and left everyone, including her parents, at the bonfire. We started hooking up when my friend ran over. Apparently they could see everything. We had on glow stick necklaces and bracelets. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8259) - you deserved it (48323)
On 07/20/2009 at 12:50pm - intimacy - by hoho5191 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my little brother punched me in the stomach. When I didn't flinch and he asked me why, I decided to be funny and tell him I was Iron Man and nothing could hurt me. Two seconds later he took a step back and kicked me in the nuts as hard as he could. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8258) - you deserved it (28269)
On 12/14/2009 at 6:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was walking to the bus stop. I saw a chunk of ice and attempted to kick it. Sadly it was frozen to the ground, so I fell, broke my toe, and missed the bus. Even the bus driver was laughing as he drove by. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8256) - you deserved it (17801)
On 12/27/2009 at 3:43am - misc - by Icy (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I locked my keys in my car. After spending 20 minutes on the phone with AAA, and then waiting a half hour, the guy showed up, he stuck his hand in the drivers side window and asked, "You couldn't just reach in?" I forgot I left the window open. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8252) - you deserved it (78572)
On 04/17/2009 at 12:49pm - misc - by .... (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8251) - you deserved it (24815)
On 12/10/2012 at 1:09pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I baked some regular brownies for my friend. Just to mess with him, after he ate some, I said they had weed in them. He trashed my room in anger, and still won't believe me when I tell him that I didn't actually slip him any drugs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8251) - you deserved it (25687)
On 12/21/2012 at 3:48pm - misc - by mateyouremental - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I ignored my phone, as my mother has dementia and calls me 15 or so times a day, thinking each time is the first. I braved horrendous rain and gale-force winds to go to work. Turns out it was work calling to tell me not to bother coming in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8245) - you deserved it (32373)
On 01/03/2012 at 11:07am - work - by sparkx555 (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I got a phone call from a number I didn't recognize. It was a man with a speech impediment, and I began imitating him. He was the manager of a store I applied at. He wanted to arrange an interview. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8241) - you deserved it (156146)
On 05/24/2009 at 10:50am - work - by oopsie (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I found out the electric bill I have been paying was on my old house. I found this out when they shut off the power to my house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8240) - you deserved it (1917)
On 03/11/2010 at 12:18am - money - by secret - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I faked back pain to get out of sex with my wife. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8238) - you deserved it (24481)
On 04/23/2012 at 9:48pm - intimacy - by hjkashld (man) - United States
Today, I learned that there is a limit to being thrifty. For example buying a pan from the dollar store is most likely going to cost a lot more than a few dollars. Especially when it melts all over your stove which you now have to replace. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8237) - you deserved it (19568)
On 11/25/2009 at 12:52pm - misc - by Drim (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my recently married friend took off her wedding ring to make bread. Being single and pathetic, I tried it on to see what it would look like. It got stuck on my finger. The ER doctor had to cut it off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8235) - you deserved it (34021)
On 12/22/2010 at 1:03pm - love - by lisa (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was getting dressed in my bedroom with the blinds open and had nothing covering my top half. I thought my neighbours wouldn't be able to see in through all the trees, that was until I heard someone wolf whistle and one of my neighbours running away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8234) - you deserved it (19211)
On 12/10/2011 at 8:35pm - misc - by nakedness (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Monday 20 May 2013
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