Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I accidentally dropped a sculpture at college, and it broke. Some weirdo wearing a pink cape and a fake moustache bitched me out and told me not to be such an attention-seeking drama queen. FML

#19026244
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26413) - you deserved it (3239)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I went to my first day of work in over 2 years. As I approached the boss, he asked me what my name was. Turned out they hired the wrong person. FML

#13593951
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26412) - you deserved it (1989)

On 10/25/2010 at 8:22pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went horseback riding with this guy I like. I asked him to help me get on the horse. I slipped, and while trying to keep my balance, I kicked him in the face. FML

#14267759
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26412) - you deserved it (5380)

On 12/20/2010 at 1:22am - love - by Me -

Today, someone peed in my physical education locker. The only way someone could've done it is with a ladder. I'm so popular it hurts. FML

#19084261
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26411) - you deserved it (4856)

On 02/15/2012 at 7:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me the present she bought for me. I said joking: "I hope it's not a tie!" It was a tie. FML

#343
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26412) - you deserved it (17009)

On 11/19/2008 at 6:33am - love - by Mazzam - Sent from mobile version

Today, the snowblower found my lost phone. FML

#14952947
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26409) - you deserved it (4702)

On 02/12/2011 at 9:21pm - misc - by cs - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I caught my boyfriend trying on my bra. He still has no excuse. FML

#19023542
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26409) - you deserved it (3873)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I was having lunch with my mom before an important job interview. She commented than my lips looked dry and crackly and gave me her chapstick with aloe to put on. Apparently I'm allergic to aloe and my lips got so swollen I could hardly talk. It was too late to reschedule the interview. FML

#6719258
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26408) - you deserved it (2298)

On 12/12/2009 at 4:28am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I realized I say "sorry" more than anything else during sex with my girlfriend. FML

#19869749
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26408) - you deserved it (9080)

On 06/30/2012 at 2:21am - intimacy - by mpsteve137 - United States (Georgia)

Today, my kitten made it snow inside my house using a 12-pack of toilet paper. FML

#20495653
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26407) - you deserved it (5009)

On 02/06/2013 at 1:00pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I saw a small child take a really bad fall off his scooter, so I got rid of my cigarette and ran to help him. I asked him if he was alright, or if I could walk him to his house. He replied "I'm okay, but your dress is on fire." It was. FML

#13147361
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26408) - you deserved it (16449)

On 09/21/2010 at 8:31pm - misc - by Laura - United States

Today, while working at my local supermarket, I found a boy lost and wandering about, so I took him to the front desk. My reward from his mother was a slap around the face and harsh words for supposedly having kidnapped him. FML

#20183959
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26406) - you deserved it (1703)

On 11/29/2012 at 1:08pm - work - by bitch i'm a gerontophile (man) - Taiwan

Today, I took my dog to the vet because he hadn't eaten his food in three days, was drinking a lot of water, and was peeing a lot (all signs of antifreeze poisoning). I spent $200 at the vet to tell me that my dog is fine and just didn't like his current food. FML

#6367435
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26404) - you deserved it (5154)

On 11/19/2009 at 11:14am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: