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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I was sitting on a plane waiting for everyone to get on. A cute guy around my age had the option of sitting next to me or an old guy. He gave me a horrified look and immediately sat next to the old man. I got to sit next to his mother. She evil eyed me the whole time. FML

#13567439
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27712) - you deserved it (3466)

On 10/23/2010 at 8:50pm - misc - by ugly me - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was at a movie theater. I heard some obnoxious people talking in front of me. After about 5 minutes, I began throwing popcorn at a group of suspected people. As I was escorted out, I realized that the obnoxious people were in the background of the movie. FML

#13566172
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5656) - you deserved it (44758)

On 10/23/2010 at 7:14pm - misc - by escortedout (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after constantly checking my email for a week, I finally got a letter saying that I was accepted to take a test for a job position. The only problem is I was scheduled to test today, eight hours ago. FML

#13565475
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27716) - you deserved it (3325)

On 10/23/2010 at 6:11pm - work - by level6 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my parents told me about how they met. I'd already known they were eight years apart, but I never knew my dad started dating my mom when he was 21 and she was 13. FML

#13561698
350 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55365) - you deserved it (3934)

On 10/23/2010 at 12:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

lexie206's comment : wow. I guess age really didn't matter to them..

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Today, I found out that the reason I'm working as a kitchen staff instead of out on the floor of the café is because the boss does not think I'm attractive enough. My boss is my brother. FML

#13561259
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30900) - you deserved it (3989)

On 10/23/2010 at 11:13am - work - by Dude - Singapore

Today, I got very drunk after being fired from my job. In my depressed, intoxicated state, I posted my facebook status as 'Goodbye world'. The only response was from my dad saying 'cya'. His comment got 29 likes. FML

#13560342
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43952) - you deserved it (13254)

On 10/23/2010 at 9:15am - misc - by drunkfacebookuser (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend said he wants a Hello Kitty wedding. FML

#13559273
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41013) - you deserved it (9069)

On 10/23/2010 at 5:07am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I watched a grizzled, old gas station attendant with a stain on her blouse use my driver's license to pick something out of her teeth. FML

#13559030
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34387) - you deserved it (2791)

On 10/23/2010 at 4:17am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, at Burger King, I had to go to the bathroom. Two ketchup packets were under the seat and exploded on my legs and pants when I sat down. FML

#13558964
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33188) - you deserved it (5916)

On 10/23/2010 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, for my Teen Living class, all the students got a fake baby. In order to stop the baby from crying, you have to use the bracelet they provide. I lost the bracelet. I have the baby all weekend. FML

#13558555
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9028) - you deserved it (38996)

On 10/23/2010 at 2:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I found my pet hamster that escaped yesterday, wet and soggy, next to my pet dog. My dog chewed it. FML

#13558401
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29372) - you deserved it (3754)

On 10/23/2010 at 2:22am - animals - by poorhamster - United States (Washington)

Today, talking to my boyfriend about each others families, we noticed we both had an aunt with the same name. After a while of trying to figure things out, we decide to call her. Turns out that we are long distance cousins. FML

#13558265
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56615) - you deserved it (4389)

On 10/23/2010 at 2:07am - love - by Oriianna Raiinbow (woman) - United States (California)

bmore225's comment : Keep it in the family I suppose.

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Today, I was disciplining one of my students for behavior, and he started to roll his eyes every time I was trying to teach the lesson. So I threatened to write him up. After looking closely at the student, I realized he has a lazy roaming eye. FML

#13555511
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9342) - you deserved it (35488)

On 10/22/2010 at 10:15pm - work - by qhu - United States (Florida)



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