Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. After three long weeks of him ignoring me and cancelling out on time we were supposed to spend with each other. He looked at me with the most confused look on his face. Then he says ''Are you serious? I was planning the perfect day to ask you to marry me'' FML
I agree, your life sucks (29244) - you deserved it (71966)
On 03/17/2009 at 10:20am - misc - by PinkTornado - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had gone to the store and bought a new wallet. 5 minutes later a security guard asks for my receipt. Turns out I had dropped my receipt. Some guy had picked it up and pretended I had stole his wallet. The guard confiscated my wallet because the guy had "his" receipt to prove it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (81560) - you deserved it (5698)
On 03/17/2009 at 8:16am - money - by Recon (man) - Switzerland (Basel-Stadt)
Today, I was walking through Macy's with my girlfriend. I stopped to admire a mannequin's ass, joking with my girlfriend like I was touching it. Then I slapped it. It wasn't a mannequin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33522) - you deserved it (146785)
On 03/17/2009 at 6:16am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - United States (California)
Today, I decided to introduce my girlfriend to my parents by telling them that we were gonna have a very special guest for dinner. While my mom was preparing the meal she asked, "What does he like?" I'm straight. My parents thought different. FML
I agree, your life sucks (73353) - you deserved it (6084)
On 03/17/2009 at 3:25am - love - by isaacBENNETT (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I fell down a flight of stairs onto cement and had to get stitches in my knee. The class I was running to was Buddhist Philosophy where I was supposed to give a presentation on how we all need to slow down and stop rushing through life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18214) - you deserved it (47001)
On 03/17/2009 at 3:19am - misc - by Noname - United States (Washington)
Today, I texted my boyfriend of 6 months saying that I was in the mood, and that I was in bed, and naked. He texted back saying "U got fingers, use them, im going to bed xoxo". FML
I agree, your life sucks (114208) - you deserved it (28256)
On 03/17/2009 at 1:06am - intimacy - by princess (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my fish's tank was all green and nasty, but I had no time to clean it because I woke up late, so the job was left to my mom. When I came back, the water level seemed high, and the fish looked a little strange, so I asked my mom what she did. She said "I cleaned the tank with chlorine!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (38340) - you deserved it (23034)
On 03/17/2009 at 12:34am - animals - by Poorfish (man) - United States (California)
Today, after work I went to the parking lot to my car to go home. I found my car doors heavily scratched and all my tires cut, with a note on my windshield. The note read, "F*** you, Jackson." I'm Tyler. Jackson is my co-worker. FML
I agree, your life sucks (146415) - you deserved it (5758)
On 03/16/2009 at 11:17pm - work - by Dansonn (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was walking out of the grocery store and out of no where, a car backing up pretty fast speeds downs the parking lot and hits me, causing me to fall down and drop all of the groceries. The woman jumped out of her car, not to help me, but to carefully check her bumper for scratches. FML
I agree, your life sucks (87983) - you deserved it (2750)
On 03/16/2009 at 11:13pm - misc - by dxplq876 (man) - United States
Today, was my sixteenth birthday. I was hoping to get a car. Instead, my parents got me a 3 month membership at the gym so I can lose weight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32368) - you deserved it (40473)
On 03/16/2009 at 11:10pm - misc - by not_so_sweet_sixteen - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I got a phone call saying I was no longer a bridesmaid for a wedding in June. It's my mom's 4th wedding. I'm getting replaced by our dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (160445) - you deserved it (10879)
On 03/16/2009 at 10:41pm - animals - by Noname - United States (California)
Today, my dad gave me a promise ring on my one year anniversary with my boyfriend and made me swear I would wait til marriage. Four hours later he walked in on us having sex in my bedroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34735) - you deserved it (203331)
On 03/16/2009 at 10:19pm - intimacy - by thiswouldhappen. - United States (Florida)
Today, I was with my grandma waiting in a line. She only speaks Chinese and there was a black man in front of us talking his phone. My grandma tells me that the black man's really loud and annoying. The man finishes and turns and said fluently in Chinese, "What's wrong with loud black men?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (45724) - you deserved it (23921)
On 03/16/2009 at 10:09pm - misc - by kaichennnxx (man) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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