secretlynormal

Miss

0
Followed

0
Followers

15
Badges

1
Comments

2486
Visits

1496
Favorites

London, United Kingdom
29 years-old
Friday 13 December 1996
In a relationship

About Secretlynormal

I don't know what to put here. I guess there isn't much more to say about me. FML.

Secretlynormal - Followers

Secretlynormal - Followed

Secretlynormal's page visits

lovers5201

Hugged!

Secretlynormal's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done, wrong turn. Go back.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

I agree, my mouse works.

200 "I agree" votes is a good start.

YDI Master

You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.

Judgmental

You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.

It's in the can!

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

50 favorites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

A new thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.

100 kick-ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

The return of the thumb

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

My diary is a collector's item

There were only 100 numbered VDM diaries for 2011/2012. I've got one.

Tell us what happened next

You've commented on an FML that you sent in

Work is a 4-letter word

Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator.

50 quality comments

Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Tweet, tweet

You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we understand why.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Socialite

You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

The list of badges to find

Secretlynormal's favorite FMLs

By hallofail - 01/11/2012 00:40 - United States - Birmingham

Today, I dressed up like a pirate, dressed my dog as a parrot and bought $30 worth of candy to pass out to trick-or-treaters. I waited by the door for 3 hours. Not one kid came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 690

You deserved it 3 011

Get away from me

By OhLovely - 01/11/2012 01:39 - Canada - Mississauga

Today, I found out that my over-controlling parents would be moving in next door. I'm almost 23, and moved 5,365 km away to get away from them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 214

You deserved it 1 949

By ananymous - 01/11/2012 03:04 - United States - Spencerport

Today, I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into my house. I've been searching my house for two hours and still can't find him. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 757

You deserved it 2 817

Excuses

By NotAnExcuse - 07/11/2012 05:58 - United States

Today, a woman on the train demanded I give up my seat for her, claiming it was for people with disabilities. Tired from a long day at work, and seeing she had nothing wrong with her, I asked what her disability was. Apparently, obesity is one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 660

You deserved it 2 401

By anonymous - 27/03/2013 23:55 - United States - Honolulu

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

I agree, your life sucks 89 242

You deserved it 9 269

Reveal

By everyoneheard - 28/03/2013 15:11 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was eating out with a group of friends and my boyfriend. During the meal, I accidentally took a sip from my male friend's glass. My boyfriend pointed and said, "Babe, you took his drink." My friend responded by putting his arm round me and saying, "Whatever, I took her virginity." FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 190

You deserved it 18 279

By fucked by sex ed - 29/03/2013 17:18 - United States - Manchester

Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 912

You deserved it 17 036

By Badam - 30/03/2013 01:29 - France - Geaune

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She didn't say no, she didn't faint, and she didn't cry. She just stared at me blankly and said, "But... why...?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 248

You deserved it 4 102

By fuck you dad - 30/03/2013 18:17 - Ireland - Carrickmacross

Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He raised an eyebrow and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 523

You deserved it 55 597

By BornInTheWrongEra - 31/03/2013 06:24 - United States

Today, my neighbours came to yell at me as they could hear my "shit music" through my window during the afternoon, so I turned it off. They then began to play their definition of "quality music" into the late hours of the night. I was listening to the Beatles. They blasted Nicki Minaj. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 265

You deserved it 5 570

Overjoyed

By madiison09 - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I got a letter from Yale Law School saying I got a 4 year full scholarship. I called my dad crying and read the whole thing… even the bottom of the letter, which said, "April fools' ! Love, Mom and Dad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 811

You deserved it 6 626

By Anonymous - 02/04/2013 09:22 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, my little sister figured out how to use the printer. I came home to pictures of Nicolas Cage all over my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 354

You deserved it 5 834

By Anonymous - 02/04/2013 10:30 - United States - Beaumont

Today, my boss threatened to fire me for killing him in Minecraft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 467

You deserved it 8 366

By SayCheese - 02/04/2013 22:52 - Canada - Prince George

Today, my older brother walked in on me while I was wearing nothing but a bra, panties, pantyhose, and high heels. I'm his little brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 067

You deserved it 72 357

By fuck YOLO - 03/04/2013 05:20 - United States - Ramona

Today, my cousin is visiting from Oklahoma. He can't go a minute without saying "YOLO" or "Swag". He's going to be here for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 360

You deserved it 3 933

Remember One Direction stans?

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was lost in a foreign city so I asked a girl for directions. She replied, "Directions? ONE DIRECTION!" and started screaming in my face and jumping around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 436

You deserved it 5 815

By Anonymous - 03/04/2013 13:32 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I dropped our daughter. Our hypothetical daughter. Represented by a stuffed owl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 716

You deserved it 6 114

By me - 04/04/2013 20:07 - United States - Parrish

Today, I told my bald, goatee-sporting chemistry teacher that he looks like Walt from Breaking Bad. I quickly got sent to the principal's office and received a 3-day suspension for "slandering" my teacher by implying that he makes meth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 475

You deserved it 6 714

By anonymous - 04/04/2013 22:52 - United States - Spring Valley

Today, I picked my 12-year-old daughter up from school after her first sexual education lecture. She burst into tears on the way home explaining her fears of being pregnant with her boyfriend's child. As if that doesn't sound bad enough, I've met her boyfriend before. He is imaginary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 780

You deserved it 4 203

By confusedcatlover - 06/04/2013 11:42 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I walked in on my husband eating cat food out of the cat bowl dressed in a cat costume. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 306

You deserved it 6 225