Today, while in the middle of giving my husband a blow job, I looked up to see him staring into space and vigorously picking his nose. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my husband decided to pick his nose out before he would kiss me. FML
Today, I was having amazing sex with my husband. When he blew his load, he also blew something else - a giant glob of snot, directly at my face. FML
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend in bed after a round of amazing sex. He decided it would be a great time to stick his finger up my nose. FML
Today, my boyfriend had his arm around me. He pulled me closer, so I looked up, thinking maybe he wanted a kiss. Turns out he was picking his nose over my head. FML
Today, I was talking to my husband about how I wanted our marriage to improve and not just be sex all the time. In the middle of my sentence, he asked for a blow job. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to pick my nose. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to pick his nose for him. FML
Today, I was trying to sneak up my husband while he was playing a computer game. As I was getting behind the chair, he paused the game and sat up straight. I stopped. He turned around and sneezed violently and blew a bunch of snot into my face and eyes. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend and he ejaculated without warning, shooting straight up my nostril. I accidentally snorted it, started choking, and then coughed it up in my mouth. FML
Today, having regularly given my husband blowjobs, I suggested, mid-session, that he could maybe reciprocate. He complained that I was wet, begrudgingly licked for about a minute and then gave up. FML
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Top comments
Savra_fml 17
First he puts on dirty underwear after a shower, and now this! Stop giving head OP!
nick347b 6
He's enjoying it. Trust me, I'm a guy.
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Comments (221)
kennedy98 2
Suck harder lol
EmperorXing 0
Hes trying to find something better
tmd4L 7
Did he shoot his snot rocket?
zombicidal 11
better mining nose gold than a golden shower
loopmeinoddone 0
Divorce.
xXRazelleLuniiXx 9
People like you are the reason why marraiges seem to fail now-a-days.
Endless_time 4
Picking his nose....or digging for gold...?
RrLSf19 0
Eww
BostonBruinsFan 8
Your dog is awesome!!
geod69 8
What else is he suppose to do with his finger
gregkingsley 4
Lol
BostonBruinsFan 8
#75, she sucks so much, that he's checking to see if there is any brains left. (husband says)"Oh, can't find it! I can't find it! No, wait, there it is! My pea-sized brain is intact, and safe. Ok, Keep sucking, Honey!!!"! -.-