Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. I minimized the porn on my laptop so she wouldn't see I was watching it. It turns out I was watching an old Beatles concert before I started masturbating. My mom thought I was masturbating to the Beatles. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I came home, turned on my laptop, and turned the TV on mute so I could check my email. My mom came home an hour later, took a look at me on the couch, then the TV, and asked what on earth I was watching. I looked up from my laptop and realized it was porn. FML
Today, my mom walked in on me jerking it in her bathroom. I'm a 40 year-old man and she's 68. FML
Today, my mom laughed about hearing me singing in the shower and told our whole family. I wasn't singing, though. I was masturbating. FML
Today, my mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. FML
Today, I was bored and started touching myself watching TV. My mother walked into my bedroom with a phone in her hand and yelled, "Stop jacking off and talk to your grandmother." FML
Today, my brother walked in on me jerking off. I managed to close the porn tab, at least, only to end up on my mom's Facebook profile. FML
Today, I was watching porn and found my mom on a webcam. When I told her that I saw her, she just took away my computer and told me to get off porn. FML
Today, despite being 21 years old and living in my own place, my mom still managed to walk in on me whacking off. FML
Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. She didnt look away and we stared at each other for a while; then she asked me what I wanted from McDonalds. FML
Today, I accidentally connected my phone to my mum's headphones while watching porn. FML
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Top comments
GameRater01 0
I never realized there were so many people in the world without access to rooms with locks as when I started coming to fmylife
jESuS_lOVeS_mE69 0
So is it safe to assume i'm the only one who masterbates to old Beatles concerts?
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Comments (136)
MCart_fml 0
LOL #4, #11. Awesome #22, keep up the good work!
beanrich 0
but do you finish?
Sonic_Rocker 0
Could've been worse... It could have been a Michael Jackson concert. At least the Beatles don't have sexual controversy.
Sulk 0
It is always the mum's fault for walking in. Yes, it's true. This is an imbroglio on your MUM'S part. "Today, I let my manners slide and walked in without announcement or forewarning into my kid's room. FML." Mum's of teenagers should know better to bloody knock and wait respectfully whilst their kid puts away their toys and ****.
tyler1 0
wait, its not normal to wank to the beatles?!!?!?!?! CRAP! so THAT's why my mom started crying...
nerv_fml 0
LOCK THE DOOR!!!!!
jabbaundead 0
LOL! but trust me.. it probably could have been worse. like a michael jackson video perhaps?
may_cause_fail 0
I don't know, young John was pretty hot... ;D And agreed with #19: it could have been much worse. XD
SilverBallet 0
Why do people react to these situations as if their parents are oblivious to the fact that yes, kids will **********? Jeez. Just a heads up, people, your parents have had sex before. Even if they don't say it, they *know* you're gonna do something eventually. And, hey, at least you were just masturbating. If your mom really freaked out at the sight, you could have just looked at her and said, "Hey, at least I'm not doing crack."
foxfire730 0
ok...either get a lock. or post a sign that says "please knock." or why dont you save everyone some grief and ********** when you're alone and when there is no possiblity of being interrupted. then you're home free!