Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I texted this girl I really like and she didn't answer. She did about two hours later and it said, "Sorry, I was having sex at the time you texted me. So how are you?" FML
Today, my girlfriend noticed that I looked upset and asked me what was wrong. I told her I was sexually frustrated. Her response? "What are you telling me for?" FML
Time is money
Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML
Today, I texted my girlfriend, saying how I hated my job, I felt trapped, and that I was wasting my time working there. A few minutes later, she answered, "That's how I feel about our relationship." FML
Today, my girlfriend texted one of her male friends, saying she's turned off by the thought of sex with me. She suggested a bit of "exercise sex" with him. I'm sure he would have eagerly agreed, if he'd been the one receiving the texts. FML
Today, I told my long-distance girlfriend that I just could not handle the distance and we should just be friends. To which she responded, "What? You thought we were going out? Lol". FML
Today, I texted my girlfriend a long heartfelt loving message for our 2-year anniversary. Her reply was just "K." FML
Today, I texted my girlfriend a long, heartfelt message this morning. Her response? "What do you need? Or is this even really you?" FML
Today, I wanted to text my girlfriend but lately we'd been at a loss for things to talk about. I thought, "Come on, she's your girlfriend, what's the worst that could happen." One hour and twenty two minutes later, I was single. FML
Today, my girlfriend of ten months sent me a picture message of her making out with a guy. Under it, it read, "You can pick your stuff up in the morning." FML
Top comments
ycrem0n 21
Proof that guys aren't always the animals starving for sex
dominic1221 6
You're an illiterate moron, aren't you? Maybe you should spend less time jacking off in English class, kid.
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Comments (175)
gadgetgti 0
Turn on ur man card !!!! NOW!!!!!
beastmode707 1
Turn on your man card?
spaffler 2
I'm not a virgin and I agree cuddling with my gf is as satisfying as sex with her. But I say do both lol. Cuddle to foreplay to ******* her brains out to cuddling again. You both win. Time together and sex together. At least she wants you and not some other dude
fljp 18
my boyfriend is exactly like this guy. i hear from all my guyfriends they wished their girlfriends would have sex more often. my boyfriend only wants to do it once a month. and it's pissing me off. so maybe OP is that kind of guy and i understand the girl's reaction.
MissHayleyJames 7
Wow you care about him oh so much. Get the **** over it. Not everyone has a high libido. If you care about sex more than him, go find some douche bag that'll **** your brains out 24/7 and let him find someone who actually cares about him. You don't deserve your boyfriend if you'd treat him like shit like that.
fredstarrz 8
Smh damn shame... Tell your girl to text me that see if I turn it down
iloveweed69 7
Well sex her up boy~
13crice 3
Bang her bro
becka344 0
Awww.
triggerit 5
We need more such miracles...
challan 19
I don't know why 15 was thumbed down so much! Let's be honest, we all were thinking that. Anyone would be upset by op's reply. Being horny and turned down by your partner would suck. You hear guys say it all the time, so it's different cause he turned her down?!
pimpcracker 8
what the hell is wrong with u??? ohhh that's right ur gay!