Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I texted this girl I really like and she didn't answer. She did about two hours later and it said, "Sorry, I was having sex at the time you texted me. So how are you?" FML
Today, my girlfriend noticed that I looked upset and asked me what was wrong. I told her I was sexually frustrated. Her response? "What are you telling me for?" FML
Time is money
Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML
Today, I texted my girlfriend, saying how I hated my job, I felt trapped, and that I was wasting my time working there. A few minutes later, she answered, "That's how I feel about our relationship." FML
Today, my girlfriend texted one of her male friends, saying she's turned off by the thought of sex with me. She suggested a bit of "exercise sex" with him. I'm sure he would have eagerly agreed, if he'd been the one receiving the texts. FML
Today, I told my long-distance girlfriend that I just could not handle the distance and we should just be friends. To which she responded, "What? You thought we were going out? Lol". FML
Today, I texted my girlfriend a long heartfelt loving message for our 2-year anniversary. Her reply was just "K." FML
Today, I texted my girlfriend a long, heartfelt message this morning. Her response? "What do you need? Or is this even really you?" FML
Today, I wanted to text my girlfriend but lately we'd been at a loss for things to talk about. I thought, "Come on, she's your girlfriend, what's the worst that could happen." One hour and twenty two minutes later, I was single. FML
Today, my girlfriend of ten months sent me a picture message of her making out with a guy. Under it, it read, "You can pick your stuff up in the morning." FML
Top comments
ycrem0n 21
Proof that guys aren't always the animals starving for sex
dominic1221 6
You're an illiterate moron, aren't you? Maybe you should spend less time jacking off in English class, kid.
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Comments (175)
immaMonsta 8
I said that I PREFER 2-3 times a day. We don't actually do it that often. In reality we only have sex 3 times in a weekend. Besides, it's not like sex is all that important in our relationship.
MissHayleyJames 7
3 times in a weekend can still very easily be considered a lot.
twiins_fml 5
She is right you know..
boopityboppity 11
Madam, I think you have a problem with your brain being missing. Your reaction disgusts me.
perei176 9
Girls need it just like men do!! Instead of being a baby, let her know how much you want her too! Make it more exciting and ur relationship will be stronger.
Billy67_fml 0
Consider yourself lucky!
daltonromanowski 11
I think it's pretty gross your girlfriend assumes non-sexual activity is solely for women, considering men are statistically more likely to covet non-sexual contact in a relationship (surprising, I know). In any case, I'm sorry she doesn't seem to respect your space and desires. It was rude of her (both to you and to all women) to insult your masculinity. Perhaps you should find somebody better for you.
chrisoc16 0
Wtf is wrong with u. U should be wanting to
Levvy 22
Should be? According to who? What authority is it that dictates what people should and should not be wanting and when? Could you point us to it?
fuckmebutdontfml 16
I sence some roll reversals in your realtionship but FYL OP its clear that you want a real realtionship with her not just a physical one. I hope things work out between you too if not you deserve better. Sex is part of a relationship not all of it.
thedemonbear88 0
If u want look at it having sex is spending time together just more physical and fun
angryyute 4
You sound like a BITCH!!!!
lemonsquid 6
God that sucks.