Today, I got a phone call from my boyfriend breaking things off with me. He waited until the day after Christmas because he wanted all his presents. And he got me nothing. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend sent me a text saying to call him. When I did, it went straight to voicemail. It was a recording of him breaking up with me. He broke up with me over the phone, without even talking to me. FML
Today, my fiancé broke it off with me on our 3-year anniversary at 12:01 a.m. on Thanksgiving morning. Guess who gets to go to family gatherings where everyone will be asking where he is. FML
Today, I caught my boyfriend cheating right after I maxed out my credit card buying him everything on his Christmas list. FML
Today, I hadn’t seen my boyfriend since New Year’s Day, then we went out for lunch Valentine's Day and at the end of the date he didn’t even kiss me. He texted me at midnight tonight saying he sorry he’s a jerk and broke up with me. FML
Today, I was going to break up with my boyfriend for taking me for granted and being such a jerk. He didn't even show up for our date. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me the best birthday ever, then promptly broke up with me at midnight to get back with his ex, because he "didn't want to ruin my special day." FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She then proceeded to ask for all the gifts she gave me for Christmas back. FML
Today, I got an email saying the gift I'd ordered for my boyfriend of three years had been sent. I ordered it a couple of days ago because I thought he needed cheering up. I guess he found a better way of doing so himself; he broke up with me yesterday. FML
Today, my boyfriend of a year dumped me by text. It's also the day that the birthday present I ordered for him was finally processed and shipped, meaning I can't cancel and get my money back. FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend called me. I was really excited, thinking he wanted to get back together. He just wanted to get back the Christmas present he gave me before we broke up so that he could return it for cash. FML
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Top comments
tehslack 5
You deserve better, my dear. Just move on.
iheartkanye 8
Steal back the presents from that bastard!
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Comments (113)
tehslack 5
You deserve better, my dear. Just move on.
Tali147 16
Merry Christmas, I'm giving you the gift of singleness!
Cairo_Sanchez 8
What a piece of shit! Sorry OP, karma will handle it
rockstar362 8
Is he Jewish?
happle 21
One of my exes never got me anything either for Christmas, Valentine's, my birthday, etc. I still wonder why I was with him for so long.
sens3sfailing 25
I don't get that, I looooooove spoiling girls I'm with. I have been told to stop spending money on them... It's just nice to see the smile a girl gets when you give her something she can cherish from you.
dunebro 15
Do you know her? If not, then how do you know she deserves better? Maybe she's a horrible person who dislikes bacon and hates puppies. No offense but you can't decide she deserves better if you don't know anything about her.
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Jolene...JOLENE!!!
slimshadyfan123 4
Haha Dolly Parton @92
thatpeachyperson 12
You deserve better than that asshole.
cockymofo 10
sounds like his gift was your freedom. u can't put a price tag on that. who needs a douchebag in their life anyway
MrSassypants 34
People who run feminine product companies. They need all the douchebags they can get.
iheartkanye 8
Steal back the presents from that bastard!
TML329 14
Or give him a new gift,of cole hurled at his head
billyz77 24
Or send him a bill for the amount you spent on his worthless ass.
besosforme 26
I don't know who Cole is, but make sure he agrees to a fight before just volunteering for him, 25. Unless, of course, what you meant was "coal". =P
TML329 14
Well if I'm bigger then cole he doesn't have much say in the matter before I throw him:}. But yes I did mean coal
poccocurantes 7
I think TML wanted to slaw him.
CTVrhythmguitari 8
He gave you a chance to find a better boyfriend. ._.
BellaBelle_fml 23
Probably the best Christmas present she got.
Homer1975 14
yes,he give the girl a better chance to find the better one
howdeedoo 22
You should take back his gift and give him a different sort of gift: a swift kick to his naughty bits
MrSassypants 34
Then you'll see a "YDI FML" saying: "Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by kicking me in the nuts and taking the stuff back she gave to me. FML."
cheer21moose 13
Very naughty bits
nycwrestler 17
He gave you the gift of freedom!
ICastillo 25
Wow he is the true definition of a douche bag.
DanielleinDC 34
What a schmuck. Hope he's alone for a long, long time. And as others have said, you deserve better.
DocBastard 40
I hope Santa took a shit in his chimney.
Tali147 16
If he didn't, he will now.
PrincessLiLi_fml 7
If Santa doesn't, someone else should. What a prick.
MelTheGreat 23
Preferably diarrhea.
destroyu 8
Sucks for you but you are better off