Today, my 13-year-old daughter and I went to a tropical themed restaurant. She wanted a strawberry Daiquiri, so I asked the waitress for a virgin strawberry Daiquiri. My daughter then said, "But dad, I'm not a virgin." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my daughter ran up to me and gave me a cup. She said it was lemonade that she made with her friend. When I took a sip, she giggled and ran back to her room. It was not lemonade. FML
Today, my daughter told me she wants to be a stripper when she grows up, just like "Daddy's girlfriend." We're still married. FML
Today, I went to a frozen yogurt stand with my dad. One of the flavors was called "Juicy Cherry." I had to stand there and watch in horror as he told the woman running the stand all about how he'd like to taste her juicy cherry. FML
Today, my 12-year-old daughter informed me that she is eager to lose her virginity, "Because I don't want to be thrown into a volcano!" FML
Today, my daughter asked me to take her to Victoria's Secret so I could buy her some "sexy clothes". She's 9. FML
Today, I was telling my teenage daughter about the effects from alcohol, and how she should not give in to peer pressure. While talking, I noticed that she was looking at me funny. There was a wine glass in my hand. FML
Today, my teenage daughter asked me how old I was when I lost my virginity. I sarcastically replied that I'm still a virgin. She looked at me blankly and said, "Jeez, no wonder you're so uptight. You need to get laid, mom." FML
Today, my mother and I went to Wal-Mart to buy pads. I suggested I get tampons instead, so that I can go swimming at my boyfriend's cottage. My mother then goes to the nearest store employee and asks, "excuse me, if my daughter uses a tampon, does that mean she is no longer a virgin?" FML
Today, my 15-year-old birth daughter asked if I've ever had sex. FML
Today, my daughter's teacher called me, very concerned, because my child told the whole class she's not a virgin anymore. The word is "vegan", Honey. FML
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Top comments
Sir_ND_Pity 35
1 - Yes, yes she did :)
iLike2Teabag 27
Don't pretend like any other generation didn't do their share of questionable things.
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Comments (361)
pooperoni 6
I love how staff member 'alan' has deleted two of my posts because I disagreed with him. I wasn't disrespectful in any way, and didn't break any of the 'fml rules'. That's pathetic.
123man 11
@128, That's happened to me before. Once I got a message saying I broke some rule (wasn't clear what), other times nothing at all.
TheHeavyOne 15
Holy F**k. Potential parenting fail! 13?! FYL, dude. Sorry!
MaggieJH 7
The moment every dad dreads..
pooperoni 6
I love how FML staff member 'alan' is being unnecessarily rude to a poster regarding spelling and grammar, and then when I disagree with him my comments are deleted. despite the fact that I haven't broken any 'fml rules'. then im accused of being a troll, for speaking up about alan being a troll.
000lizzy000 13
Thats horrible
boo987 0
I actually was a honour student all throughout school. I maintained straight As in most of my courses, despite skipping classes, drinking and *gasp * having sex at 13. I was neither pressured nor uninformed and it was brilliant. I'm now happily married with three planned kids and a PhD. Thank you.
RedPillSucks 33
Nobody is saying that it always turns out one way or another. Let me ask, are you planning on telling your kids that it's OK to have sex at 13 or 12 or whatever, as long as you "know what your doing and can protect yourself"? I'm pretty sure most kids now-adays know about protection yet there are still lots of unwanted pregnancies and STDs.
FloMarDee 19
I'm just not sure she knew what she was saying.... I really hope the OP posts a follow-up because I think we will be surprised at the direction of the family discussion after this comment was made... maybe it gave an opportunity for parents and child to open up dialogue for conversations that really need to be had either way?
Recon1 11
Find him and send me the coordinates. No one will ever know.
imtooshy 18
I CAN'T SWEARRR ;-;
CrimsonAmaryllis 18
Hopefully as a 13 year old what she thought was losing her virginity was just kissing?