Today, my 13-year-old daughter and I went to a tropical themed restaurant. She wanted a strawberry Daiquiri, so I asked the waitress for a virgin strawberry Daiquiri. My daughter then said, "But dad, I'm not a virgin." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my daughter ran up to me and gave me a cup. She said it was lemonade that she made with her friend. When I took a sip, she giggled and ran back to her room. It was not lemonade. FML
Today, my daughter told me she wants to be a stripper when she grows up, just like "Daddy's girlfriend." We're still married. FML
Today, I went to a frozen yogurt stand with my dad. One of the flavors was called "Juicy Cherry." I had to stand there and watch in horror as he told the woman running the stand all about how he'd like to taste her juicy cherry. FML
Today, my 12-year-old daughter informed me that she is eager to lose her virginity, "Because I don't want to be thrown into a volcano!" FML
Today, my daughter asked me to take her to Victoria's Secret so I could buy her some "sexy clothes". She's 9. FML
Today, I was telling my teenage daughter about the effects from alcohol, and how she should not give in to peer pressure. While talking, I noticed that she was looking at me funny. There was a wine glass in my hand. FML
Today, my teenage daughter asked me how old I was when I lost my virginity. I sarcastically replied that I'm still a virgin. She looked at me blankly and said, "Jeez, no wonder you're so uptight. You need to get laid, mom." FML
Today, my mother and I went to Wal-Mart to buy pads. I suggested I get tampons instead, so that I can go swimming at my boyfriend's cottage. My mother then goes to the nearest store employee and asks, "excuse me, if my daughter uses a tampon, does that mean she is no longer a virgin?" FML
Today, my 15-year-old birth daughter asked if I've ever had sex. FML
Today, my daughter's teacher called me, very concerned, because my child told the whole class she's not a virgin anymore. The word is "vegan", Honey. FML
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Top comments
Sir_ND_Pity 35
1 - Yes, yes she did :)
iLike2Teabag 27
Don't pretend like any other generation didn't do their share of questionable things.
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Comments (361)
mahoney94 6
You know, there's a pretty good chance she's just stupid. I don't think an intelligent person would absent mindedly tell their father that. Maybe she's given a handjob or something, but I doubt it's that bad.
lwonderful 11
That's just wrong
Jordan96parker 8
That's how you can tell if a parent beats some knowledge into their children. If it wasn't for a Beating here and there when I was young I wouldn't be how I am. I'd be a brat. Just like the rest of this generation.
kidsgotastinky 11
Murica
TeenageAvatar 0
Sadly, as a 13 year old, I'm horrified to say I see this a lot in school. In Alameda, CA, where I live they tell seventh graders about a site where boys 11 and up can get condoms. But for OP, this is a prime reason why he should start to beat sense and good decision making into his daughter.
Mademoiselle_fml 34
It's better to teach kids sexual education and protection than abstinence. It's good that they are giving free condoms, since young teenagers can't buy them themselves, and you know their hormones aren't going to tell them "Oh well, no condom no sex!" Please.
BlissfulLiss 18
They grow up so fast..*dabs eye*
cna1216 15
Whoa. Im thirteen and havent even been on a date! I am sorry for your daughter. Thats not right!
Cristianma 13
Dang when I was 13 I was was worried about missing Pokemon, not a girl missing her period...
Iniezian 18
I honestly can't contemplate how she thought it was a good idea to say it. I mean, does she honestly expect to EVER be let out of the house by herself until she's 50 now?
saydook 3
life is short .. girls have fun of losing virginity
kt520 7
You are an idiot.