Today, my 13-year-old daughter and I went to a tropical themed restaurant. She wanted a strawberry Daiquiri, so I asked the waitress for a virgin strawberry Daiquiri. My daughter then said, "But dad, I'm not a virgin." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my daughter ran up to me and gave me a cup. She said it was lemonade that she made with her friend. When I took a sip, she giggled and ran back to her room. It was not lemonade. FML
Today, my daughter told me she wants to be a stripper when she grows up, just like "Daddy's girlfriend." We're still married. FML
Today, I went to a frozen yogurt stand with my dad. One of the flavors was called "Juicy Cherry." I had to stand there and watch in horror as he told the woman running the stand all about how he'd like to taste her juicy cherry. FML
Today, my 12-year-old daughter informed me that she is eager to lose her virginity, "Because I don't want to be thrown into a volcano!" FML
Today, my daughter asked me to take her to Victoria's Secret so I could buy her some "sexy clothes". She's 9. FML
Today, I was telling my teenage daughter about the effects from alcohol, and how she should not give in to peer pressure. While talking, I noticed that she was looking at me funny. There was a wine glass in my hand. FML
Today, my teenage daughter asked me how old I was when I lost my virginity. I sarcastically replied that I'm still a virgin. She looked at me blankly and said, "Jeez, no wonder you're so uptight. You need to get laid, mom." FML
Today, my mother and I went to Wal-Mart to buy pads. I suggested I get tampons instead, so that I can go swimming at my boyfriend's cottage. My mother then goes to the nearest store employee and asks, "excuse me, if my daughter uses a tampon, does that mean she is no longer a virgin?" FML
Today, my 15-year-old birth daughter asked if I've ever had sex. FML
Today, my daughter's teacher called me, very concerned, because my child told the whole class she's not a virgin anymore. The word is "vegan", Honey. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Sir_ND_Pity 35
1 - Yes, yes she did :)
iLike2Teabag 27
Don't pretend like any other generation didn't do their share of questionable things.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (361)
iwadasn 33
If she'd lost her virginity due to being raped, you'd think her father would already be aware of it. And if she'd been raped and was keeping it a secret, why would she suddenly announce it at a restaurant? I think you're just looking for an excuse to feel self-righteous.
djinnyf 12
Poor dad!
yarani 26
Maybe she meant the astrological sign? -.- Let's hope that's it!
ermagherdaturdis 26
@161, you mean Virgo
ashleytianarose 13
Don't feel too bad. You can't control her every move. I just hope you didn't take the fact that her cherry is "popped" lightly.
nyxiny 22
How does she even know what a Daiquiri is? *I* don't even know what that is, and I'm 23!
LifeOfAnRN 18
Are you sure she wasn't just trying to get a reaction out of you? I mean, I have 3 grown sons and STILL wouldn't say that to my dad.
vadala18 13
Make sure she see a doctor. Talk to her about safely.
FMLbutYDI 17
Isn't this a repost?
rachel_souther 5
You can't say it's his fault. I have great parents but I lost my virginity and got pregnant at age 15 I am now a 16 year old single mother to my amazing 3 month old son. It's not their fault it's mine. If you want to blame someone other that the child herself Blame society..
RetardedPotato 6
I don't mean to come off as nosey (I'm a victim and result of sexual abuse) but your profile picture's a bit inappropriate for a teen. Sorry if this comment's a little offensive.
BaraSkit07 12
Really, most things that children do can be traced back to the parents or society. While I do agree that losing ones virginity at 13 is young, I wouldn't say there's anything wrong with it. If they get pregnant that is bad but from what I've seen the ones who do mature quickly and are much more responsible than the rest when it comes to sex.
rachel_souther 5
Actually.No. Getting pregnant is not bad, it is a blessing. If it wasn't for me getting pregnant last year I would have killed myself or ended up in a hospital I was so depressed and thought I was going nowhere in life and that my life had no purpose. I was wrong my life has a huge purpose, to graduate, take care of my beautiful son and have a good life. I cannot imagine where I'd be right now if it wasn't for my child.
rachel_souther 5
Do you think Pokemon is for mature people? LOL. Babies are blessings! I do find it offensive that you pretty much called me immature. I am doing a great job raising my son as a single mother, making sure he is happy and healthy! I am also proudly breastfeeding.
ultra_notorious 26
you're whats called a statistic.
Axel5238 29
For you it was blessing which is great. I wish you the best. There are alot who do not straighten up until there are dire consequences and a lot still don't change. While these things happened in previous generations, but the whole thing was taken much more seriously. Now it seems like kids have a really lax attitude to some very serious things such as driving while high ect...
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
Am I the only one to think that she said that as a brag? You know the way a kid would say "I'm not a baby!" when being called a child in public. It is also possible that she thinks that she is not a virgin anymore because she had her first kiss. Some kids believe the darndest things when it comes to sex. I find that odd that if she had sex; she'd tell her dad in such a conversational way. Then maybe she did have sex. And yes it sucks that she would do it so young. What matters now is to guide her and inform her on safe sex, if she chooses to be sexually active, nothing will stop her. She is better off being taught on safety.