Today, my babysitter told me to find a replacement, so I tried to bribe her into staying by offering her a raise. She told me that the money would be better spent on an exorcist. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had a babysitting job. When I got there, the parents were rushing out the door and told me they'd left instructions for the kids on the table. The first bullet point stated that the oldest was convinced she is possessed by the devil, but just to ignore it. Three more hours to go. FML
Today, I babysat the Antichrist of all kids. After the 5 long hours were over, his parents came home. Instead of paying me what they agreed, they offered to let me eat some leftovers of a takeout in the fridge. I'm so afraid of confrontation that I accepted. FML
Today, as an agency babysitter, I was sent to babysit “Satan’s evil twin.” This kid is so bad, the dad pays additional fees to the agency for every time he damages the sitter's personal items, or if they require a hospital visit. His advice was, "Don’t be afraid to hit him back or he will take your eyes." FML
Today, I called my usual babysitter, one of the few people who can handle my difficult kids, to ask her to watch them for a night next week. She refused. It turns out my wife has been repeatedly underpaying her and she's fed up with it. So long date nights, I guess. FML
Today, I babysat the neighbors’ evil kids. They dropped them over at my house and I played with them for five hours. After taking the brats back home and putting them to bed, their mother asked me what time I came back to the house. She only paid me for the 20 minutes I was in their house. FML
Today, I was told at my babysitting job that I can't bring my toddler with me. My employer is my best friend. Now I have to find a babysitter for my kid if I want to babysit hers. FML
Today, I found out that when my room-mate agreed to babysit someone's two year old kid for money, what he really planned on doing was dumping it with me. The kid won't stop crying and screaming. FML
Today, while babysitting a girl, I told her to be quiet so she wouldn't wake her little brother. In reply, she told me that she would kill me, wake her brother up to show him my dead body, then draw all over my face. I'm stuck with her for another two hours. FML
Today, I babysat for a woman for the first time. When I arrived, there was a large pile of dishes in the sink. I decided to wash the dishes for her while the kids napped. She came home, noticed it, and bitched me out over how I'd only done it "to try and get more money" out of her. What? FML
Today, a woman got out of a car to scream at me as I was walking with the kids I babysit, demanding to know where I was taking her children. Apparently the woman who pays me is also a babysitter, who I have been "covering" for on her party nights. The mother doesn't believe I didn't know this. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Just find a babysitter who can handle sociopaths. The world needs your child to be "high-spirited" and not exorcised.
cacheson 42
Perhaps you need Nanny McPhee. Or Mary Poppins, depending on what you're hoping to accomplish.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (75)
worldclassrager 41
This is one old FML the omen was a Long time ago...
CamBamShamDaMan 26
I think if she suggests that then you should do it....
itsalanis 25
Perhaps they had a legitimate reason to go such as other work or a family matter. Most people don't just end their job abruptly. Well, at least I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt.
i_wuz_nver_here 31
No, the kid was a brat
heyLaddieHey 18
"Better spent on an exorcist" is a pretty clear indication that the babysitter is done with OP'S kid(s). Babysitter isn't quitting suddenly either, s/he warned OP to find a replacement.
itsalanis 25
Oh no. How the hell did I miss that last part? Well then, I stand fully corrected. That girl is just a twat. It was early in the morning and based on what you've seen I'm easily coerced into leaning towards the brighter side of things. I accept my downvotes.
The12thPaladin 8
Learning to
The12thPaladin 8
Learning to read the whole FML before commenting will help in the future.
RichardPencil 32
Just find a babysitter who can handle sociopaths. The world needs your child to be "high-spirited" and not exorcised.
EmoKami 21
The world definitely needs LESS sociopaths, get that demon exorcized! Kids now a days are so entitled..
missymaster 16
Hyper kids are high spirited. Entitled assholes are entitled assholes. Maybe OP should try being a better parent and discipline their little demon once in a while.
Lalala579121 28
Better yet get a babysitter who will train your child to channel their sociopathic tendencies only on bad people.
cacheson 42
Perhaps you need Nanny McPhee. Or Mary Poppins, depending on what you're hoping to accomplish.
HermioneEverdeen 7
I was thinking nanny 911
TheRealStunts 27
Or Mrs, Doubtfire
TheLadyOpal 30
Or perhaps Mrs. Baylock will turn up, if the kid's really that bad.
SirVoldemort 17
Super nanny.
Mons_fml 27
Or the dog whisperer. If its really really bad.
azzholio 7
Or maybe Susan Smith?
Chikiriwak 17
Well... did you call the exorcist?
RememberSchlitz 9
A savage response, a bridge burned, a less-than-stellar response to any questions about recommendations. Seems fair.
Sparx1_1 16
If they gave that response they aren't worried about a reference or keeping ties with OP
Nathan_R 10
If your child is bad enough to make a nanny walk out, that can only be your fault
Burle 17
That's a lot of judgment, how do you know the fault doesn't lie with the nanny? Maybe she's incompetent. You just assume bad parenting? Think of how the op will feel when they see your comment
izzajaneful 24
Better not point out root causes to problems, someone might feel bad.
trucker2 33
Maybe OP, needs to realize the child is a brat... And correct the problem, rather than to offer more money...and continue the cycle...
Burle 17
Whatever happened to innocent until proven guilty? There's absolutely no proof that it's the parents fault and not the nanny. We're a bunch of strangers on the internet making judgments on people's lives, don't think your comments don't have an effect
Burle 17
How do you know what the root cause is? You don't. You assume the worst and then feel entitled to tell someone they can't parent.
DoomedGemini 38
Probably because many people have experience with bratty kids? While it may not be op's fault, it's up to then to correct it. Trying to bribe a nanny to stay isn't trying to correct it, it's trying to get them to put up with the behavior.
fabulousfiasco 12
If someone feels this way about your child, it is best to find a replacement. I wouldn't want my child to spend time with someone who doesn't care for him.
soulreaper12296 28
Then maybe your child shouldn't be a complete asshole like it sounds like OP's is. I once babysat two kids who after I left told their mom that I locked them out of the house for an hour; all because I didn't let them play their playstation (which their mom told me she didn't want them playing all day).
sunnyray812 42
If your child really is that bad, you should consider different parenting techniques.