Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mother talked shit about me to the cat while I was in the room. FML
Today, I walked in on my mom ranting on about what a useless bitch I am. She was talking to my cat. It's not the first time this has happened, either. FML
Today, my mother yelled and yelled at me until I apologized to our cat for not petting him when he sat on my lap. FML
Today, my mom decided to only speak to me through our pet cat. FML
Today, I heard my mom ask "Are you okay?" I opened my mouth to tell her about how I've been feeling suicidal lately. At that second, I realized she was talking to my cat. FML
Today, I caught my mom eating cat biscuits. We don't have a cat. FML
Today, my mom accused my cat of being a "manipulator", and said that we should get rid of him. FML
Today, my mom came home drunk and yelled at me for 20 minutes for not feeding the cat. We don't have a cat. FML
Today, my mum sat me down for a serious talk about not being home enough - not because she misses me, but because the family cat needs more stability in her life. FML
Today, I was singing to my cat and she reached up and put her paw over my mouth. FML
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Top comments
the_anti_hipster 7
Sounds like your mom's off her meds again...
StoryOfTheYear 15
Meanwhile in the Evil household.
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Comments (189)
mamby211 5
This just made my day XD
Kasse 4
Your mum sounds awesome.
Choonie 1
Was she high?
coconutdaydream 7
Ask to join them, could be fun!
djxerxes9000 18
I'd hate to walk in on my mum stroking pussy
tony1891 22
Sounds like some pinky and the brain shit.
amykins11 6
I say the same shit to my turtles.... every evil genius needs a pet...
L_Lovegood 19
Stephanie Meyer has an entire zoo at her disposition ^_~
False_Stupidity 42
Hmmm
Darkmagic666 9
This makes me think of Pinky and the Brain. Narf!
trahelion 0
Mom sounds pretty damn funny.