Today, I went out to a nice restaurant for my friend's birthday. I went to the bathroom and heard the woman in the other stall crying. She couldn't pull her underwear up over her obese, old-lady ass because her arms don't reach that far anymore. I was the only one there. I had no choice. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was in a public bathroom with the runs when I noticed my stall didn't have any toilet paper. I was the only one in the bathroom, and I thought I could make it to the stall next to me and grab some with my pants down. I wasn't actually the only one in there. FML
Today, I was in a public toilet, enduring an extremely awkward silence between myself and the person in the next stall. In my rush to get out of there, I managed to get my ass stuck in the toilet seat, and ended up being pulled out by the maintenance men. FML
Today, I was waiting in line to use the bathroom. I complained to the guy next to me about how long the lady was taking. I kept making jokes about it, but he never seemed to laugh. Finally, the door opened and out came a lady in a wheelchair. The guy next to me was her husband. FML
Today, I took my brother to the bathroom at a restaurant. The stall next to mine was locked, so I assumed he was still in there. I yelled his name a few times, then banged on the door out of annoyance. I gave up and returned to the table, where he was sitting with a grin. Turns out I just traumatized a poor lady in the stall. FML
Today, I really had to take a shit. My coworker had gone on lunch break and I was alone in the shop. There were no customers, so to the can I went. Cue a long series of loud wet farts and splashes, followed by the flush. I emerged to see the horrified face of some old lady and her grandson who'd heard everything. FML
Today, I was shopping in a mall when I needed to go to the bathroom. One of the toilets was out of order, so I went to the other toilet. After that, there was no toilet paper, so when I saw tissue in the sink, I left the stall with my pants down and someone saw me. FML
Today, I went to the bathroom in a mall. As I was in the stall, a woman tried to open it. I yelled out that's it was occupied but she kept shaking it to open it. It came up to the point where she had to crawl under the door to see that I was there. FML
Today, I really had to pee so I took the only stall that was available in the bathroom: the handicapped stall. A girl in a wheelchair came in seconds later and cursed at me for taking her designated spot. FML
Today, while in a public bathroom, I threw out my back. A stranger had to help me pull up my pants. FML
Today, I had no choice but to use a public bathroom. I have issues going when there are others in the stalls, and apparently another person did as well. We both sat there in silence, waiting stubbornly for the other to give up and leave so we could go. It’s been 20 minutes. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
klbrend 0
Oh god. That sucks. Kudos to you for being such a nice person though.
dudemitch 0
ew. you had a choice. the fact that you actually helped probably just guaranteed you a space in heaven. fyl, but your still the nicest person ever.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (408)
klbrend 0
Oh god. That sucks. Kudos to you for being such a nice person though.
icall_BS 0
Total win use of discriptive words.
XYZzzzzzzz 0
oh, you had a choice
pingpongpickle 8
that sounds really gross and awkward...but you did the right thing I guess.. :/ lol nasty
Edwinadii 4
Oh yeah she had many choices, but she chose the right one.
meaganinja 12
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Nice person? If she was a nice person she wouldn't describe the woman and her situation so rudely and hurtfully. She clearly didn't want to help and wouldn't have if she didn't have to. I feel sorry for the woman, I know how it feels to hate your body and it doesn't make things better when someone points out your flaws.
notsofriendly 17
396, actions speak louder than words. I don't really want to get near anyone's ass, especially a stranger's - and the more ass, the worse it would be. I think OP's wording has a lot to do with having to get up close and personal with a lot of ass and very little to do with her opinion of the woman who owned it. She deserves good karma for this one.
dudemitch 0
ew. you had a choice. the fact that you actually helped probably just guaranteed you a space in heaven. fyl, but your still the nicest person ever.
sannamm 5
could have been her fml. Today, I couldn't get my underwear on in a public bathroom so someone had to help me'. FML
starry_eyed4 0
Well, at least you helped.....yipes. haha!
BenignScientists 0
keep telling yourself "karma will pay me back"
eaglesfan761 0
Karma sucks. Bad things happen to bad people, but then they happen just as much to good people.
bballer55 0
BS karma owes me a billion good things -_-
ObviouslyTDog 0
it better pay back pretty ****** good!
mifo 0
I think you are awesome for helping her so I don't think your life sucks. She would have been terribly embarrassed and upset, the poor thing.
zackyp 0
what is that on ur leg?
RavenXRampage 1
Hey Zacky, you see the look in that cute little critter's eyes? That look says '**** you, I'm an anteater!'.
ohdamn_fml 2
All hope is lost...
stop_whining 0
Oh no! You had to be completely selfless and help a person in need!
just1more 0
wow. that's disturbing, but extremely kind of you.
MrJentipede 2
At least it wasn't on your birthday.
kiltedwolf 0
Just remember, there's ALWAYS a choice. In everything in life, there's a choice. Even in death, you can still choose the fight or make it easy. You, ma'am, chose poorly.
SIMRRF 0
You idiot, there is no choice in death. You die. That's it, you can't choose to not die. And why the hell would you tell someone they chose poorly when they helped someone? I'd hate too see what karma does to people like you...