Today, I found out my wife has been bribing my daughter to keep quiet about her affair with my boss. That would explain the iPhone 4S, the $500 shoes, the $200 purse, and the professional $300 haircut. They told me it was because she had straight A's. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my daughter-in-law revealed to me that she caught my husband having an affair with her best friend. This was five years ago, and she is only telling me now because he stopped paying her the blackmail money to keep her mouth shut. FML
Today, I found out that my husband has been seeing another woman and my 16 year-old daughter once caught them while I was at work. She didn’t tell me about it because she was enjoying all the hush gifts, shoes, purses, and the payments for her BMW X3. FML
Today, my wife somehow found out that my "surprise bonus" from earlier this year was actually hush money from my boss to keep quiet about her affair. Rather than let a good thing alone, she threw a fit and called my boss's husband. Now I'm jobless, and my boss has sworn I'll never work in my industry again. FML
Today, I found out my daughter has a higher paid job in the same company I work in. I also found out she is dating my boss. FML
Today, I spent some of my pay on a birthday gift for my wife. She found out about the money going missing from our account, and now she thinks I'm having an affair. I work 24/7 and barely have time to see my friends, let alone have an affair. FML
Today, I found out that my wife has been having an affair with the guy who's been trying to get our relationship back on track. FML
Today, my boss told me he suspected his wife was cheating on him. I told him to pull up her Facebook page to look for suspicious activity. I looked at her profile picture and said, "Damn, that girl next to her fine! You know her?" It was his sixteen year-old daughter. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend's mom tried to bribe him with an iPhone to dump me. He accepted. FML
Today, I found out that my wife had been debating leaving me for an old boyfriend from high school. They rekindled their relationship on Facebook, and talking on the cell phone. Both things I insisted she have. FML
Today, I found out my husband got my 22 year-old daughter pregnant. Not only that, he’s drained our savings on her including a new iPhone and Macbook, designer clothes and handbags, etc. His defense, in all seriousness, was, "She’s not even my biological daughter, chill out." FML
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Top comments
Mr40Hands 5
Wtf, all I get for straight A's is a new basketball...
sufferinurjocks 3
That's just wrong, I feel so sorry for you, FYL
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Comments (240)
kimono_fml 17
I hope you divorce that nasty bitch, and I sure hope your child has a miserable life during this potential divorce. I never did anything like this to my parents as a child, and had I been in such a situation, I still wouldn't have
foxmatrix15 8
Sometimes you need to question ur manhood and the respect you have on ur family. When u don't get it you can start over with a new job and start a new family remember ur daughter was gonna move out eventually and ur wife was gonna leave u too. So get out now while ur alive and grow balls.
NippsSlipps 10
Holy shit you're hot, number eight!
KiDEaZe 0
Honestly this is one of the worse things I have ever heard, I'm sorry OP that you have to go through that.
MrXerxes5 6
Wow. This is *******... Painful and disgusting. I hope you leave them both. And manage to have the upper hand in the divorce so you can get yourself some alimony. :D Lol.
iPeterPan 8
Ditch dem' bitches, take the phone, sell the shoes and anything else then hack at your daughters hair when she's asleep. Divorce your wife!
SxeDaze 13
Sorry to hear that OP :/ . well at least now you have you''r boss by the balls, create a raging shitstorm on your way to his office and yell as loud as you can reguarding this incident. Create a certain list of demands that must be met or you will take this to the higher ups in the workforce.
MarjoCupcake 11
Aww man, that's gotta be terrible. If she used a card, you should report it stolen and tell the cops yoir wife and boss were trying to drain you. And send your little brat to boot camp :) Good luck man
mariet_fml 23
If you don't/can't return the gifts, give them away. Anything non-essential in her room goes with them. Find a local battered women shelter; they can give them to someone who needs them. Then shave your daughter's head bald. Tell her to have fun getting a job because you are never buying her anything ever again. As for your wife, the gifts and your daughter's testimony should be helpful in keeping her away from your money once the divorce papers are signed. Some marriages can be saved, but this one doesn't sound worth it.
herpitydurteedur 0
Yaaaay keev finally got thumbsed up for once XD At Least it's the first i've noticed it Aaand this will probably result in me ring thumbsed down +_+ oh well.