Today, thinking I could carry it all, I stubbornly brought a load of food in with both hands. The glass jar of nacho cheese smashed on my radiator, and I had to use a toothbrush to clean between the cracks. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I spent almost an hour cleaning and scrubbing the inside of my fridge. Just when I'd finished putting everything back inside, I tipped over the open milk carton. FML
Today, after a shitty day, I went to the kitchen to make myself something to eat. When I grabbed the salt container, the bottom lid came off and the salt went everywhere. FML
Today, I made a delicious casserole for dinner. Just as I was about to serve it, a bowl fell from the cupboard above, exploded on the counter and made it rain tiny, sharp glass shards on my food. I can't pick them all out. FML
Today, I tried to carry all my grocery bags in one trip. I was doing great until the plastic handles stretched and snapped in the parking lot. A carton of eggs exploded, an avocado rolled under a car, and a bottle of wine shattered. Someone asked if I needed help. I said no because I was too embarrassed. FML
Today, I made some burritos when a photo frame fell and smashed over my pan. I'm pretty broke so I thought I got all the glass out of the meat and ate some. I reheated the meat for dinner too and well, I found the glass that time... FML
Today, I was craving some comfort food, so I grabbed a bag of nachos from the cupboard and sat down to binge-watch Netflix. As I opened the bag, the chips exploded everywhere, spilling all over the couch, and floor. I spent the next half hour picking up crumbs while my dog and cats happily ate the scraps. FML
Today, I replaced the broken hot plates in my stove, only to realize that something else is broken, and it's still is not usable. I had to change it all back before I could even heat dinner. This was after I had carried the thing up and down the stairs by myself, and spent an entire afternoon cleaning it. FML
Today, I spent hours cleaning the kitchen that my slob roommates always neglect. I scrubbed the floor, emptied the fridge, washed all the dishes, etc. When I was done, I was thirsty so I got myself a soda. I opened the can, and it exploded and sprayed everything I had just washed. FML
Today, I made scrambled eggs. Returning the rest of the carton, I tripped and spilled 10 raw eggs all over the inside of the fridge. The same fridge I spent 2 hours cleaning and scrubbing every drawer and shelf of yesterday. FML
Today, I woke up earlier to food prep for lunch later. Just as I was preparing the ingredients, I dropped a thick glass saucer on the kitchen counter and it shattered like a hail storm - everywhere in the kitchen. I ended up spending more time cleaning it out and obviously logged in to work later than usual. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Why? You could have left it in place and have that beautiful cheesy aroma greet you for the next few months. You might have accidentally invented the next big Febreze concept!
Plop 17
Fecheeze?
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Comments (2)
RichardPencil 32
Why? You could have left it in place and have that beautiful cheesy aroma greet you for the next few months. You might have accidentally invented the next big Febreze concept!
Plop 17
Fecheeze?
Plop 17
That'll teach you to buy such nonsense as "nacho cheese". First off, cheese should have a proper name. Nacho cheese sounds like some shitty industrial abomination. Second, nachos are to be eaten exclusively with guacamole, otherwise it means you hate Mexico. Do you want to be confused with a Trump supporter? Is that what you really want?