Today, as always, I'm dating one of the few girls who, without fail, always finishes first when we get intimate. She's also one of those girlfriends who doesn't want to continue once she's done. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted me to be her first and last...with plenty of people in between. FML
Today, I slept with a friend who always bitches about how he can't keep a girlfriend. When he finished within 3 minutes, I understood why. FML
Today, I realized my girlfriend thinks that the goal of sex is to get it over with as quickly as possible. FML
Today, I had a one night stand. After her laying there without moving for ages, she impatiently asked if I'd finished. Once she got bored and told me to just finish myself off, her song playlist began playing "Never Gonna Dance Again". Very romantic. FML
Today, I had sex with my girlfriend. This is the seventh time in a row that she hasn't moved or made any noises the entire way through. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I finished too quickly and apologized. She said she was used to it by now. FML
Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML
Today, I had sex with my girlfriend. Being the stud that I am, after a short time I turned to her and said "You think you're ready for a round two?" She replied "No, but I do think I'm ready for the rest of round one." FML
Today, despite warning my new girlfriend I suffer from bad premature ejaculation, and should get her to orgasm first with my hand or mouth, she insisted I “just fuck her already” then she blamed me when it was over in 15 seconds. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. As soon as I began to climax, he started repeatedly asking, "Are you done? Are you done yet? Are you done?" Well, NOW I am. Thanks, honey. FML
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Top comments
MrBrightside21 20
I'd be satisfied to have anyone with a female reproductive organ.
Ziggy122 15
Hey, at least you're good enough to make her finish!
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Comments (143)
RedEG4 1
So she is like a lot of guys? Hah Just jerk it and spray on her face.
EarlFug 19
Bud, since you seem to have seen this before I think you need to look in the mirror and work on your bedside manner. Be generous and make it FUN. Make it fun and she will want to get you off too.
thats_my_job 11
I don't see what more op can do though. He's already getting her off, he isn't complaining about that. He is bemoaning the fact that his girlfriend stops once she cums. Personally, I think she's faking it. If she really knew the pleasure of cuming I think she would want her SO to get there too.
kiraleann 16
Ask for a *******, and claim you're too tired to reciprocate when it's finished.
wanderingshopper 13
Hmmm... What a rare variety of the male species! Letting the woman reach fulfillment first. Must document the case.
Ilsaluna 9
Stop working so hard (ha) until it's reciprocated. Otherwise, make sure she tips you on her way out for services rendered. Sex isn't a one-way street.
wvcheesehead1 9
Prepare her a nice romantic dinner so you can talk about this, pasta would be good... leave hers a little but noticeably underdone, that will make a good conversation starter.
dr_snow_bear 29
How can she not want to continue? How hard is it to lay on your back with your legs apart?
tj5810 21
I'm not siding with the GF by any means really, but what kind of girls are YOU getting with? Are they alive at least? Lol
candiicane 12
Now you know how most females feel, seeing as the guy usually decides it's over once he's done, regardless of the girl.
Na7e_G 4
Try to finish first an do the same to her.
buddy51 23
OP you're being **** blocked by your own techniques!! YDI for being a skillful lover with a lazy self involved and inconsiderate partner. Leave her and find someone who gives as well as takes.