Today, my friend told me how depressing it is that she hasn't had sex in two weeks. I haven't had sex in 3 years. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was giving my friend sex advice when she asked me when was the last time for me. Not only did I lie but I realized that it was in November and the time before that was June. I have had sex less times this year than she has this week. FML
Today, I realized that my relationship has hit a new low when I made an appointment with my girlfriend to have sex. I have a two week wait. FML
Today, it's been 3 years since my wife told me we should take a break from sex. We haven't touched each other since. FML
Today, my husband finally broke our two-month dry spell. I don't know what's more depressing: the fact that it had been two months or that he's horrible at sex. FML
Today, my best friend told me that she was a virgin again because she hadn't had sex in 6 months. She's 19 and actually believes it. FML
Today, I found out that my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I have in our last year of marriage. FML
Today, I discovered my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I've had in the last year. FML
Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML
Today, my girlfriend said she’s been wanting to have sex lately. We haven’t done it in so long, I've lost track. We still haven’t done it. Part of me wants to fuck someone else. FML
Today, I haven't had sex for so long that my condoms have gone off. FML
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Top comments
tweetypie 18
Yea well I haven't had sex....EVER!!!
RadikulRam 16
I haven't had sex for 7years, 253 days, 12hours and 46minutes. But it doesn't bother me.
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Comments (246)
PaulB123 11
Both of you are weird
EnterSandman_fml 20
Couldn't help but notice the avatar. Not winning the Stanley Cup for 44 years is definitely worse than not having sex for 3. At least you guys are getting competitive again.
PaulB123 11
1) Never said anything about not winning the cup being worse than this? 2) Hah. You know a lot about hockey? Neglect to mention leafs are also the second most winning team of the Stanley cup. 3) Just because they haven't won the cup doesn't mean their not competitive. Philadelphia was finalists 2 years ago, they went in second worst team to make the playoffs In the eastern conference. So they almost won, being one of the bottom teams. For years leafs have been very close to making playoffs-thus obviously 'competing' for years.
whitewoods 3
there are worse things to be without... like food or water for example.
kman1759 7
Oh shut up.
thisisafunnyname 12
or a face. it would suck not to have a face.
5t3ff1k4h 47
Um, Kman, it's true. Two weeks without sex is nothing. This girl has her priorities very mixed up... it's not like you need sex to live. It's nice to have sex, but come on.
v4extreme 6
You're seriously going to comment on an fml and say "it could be worse?" Are you new here? For the most part these posts are just first world problems, all of them could be worse.
Horcruxer 0
Agreed, food and water is not the point
Liimitless 6
Step 1: get a prostitute Step 2: have sex with him Step 3: get nasty diseases Step 4: never have sex again
lindseykcool 6
^ Because that would definitely solve all her problems? -___-
Dracoboxer357 36
But of course, Lindsey! ;) Or not.
lindseykcool 6
^ of course! haha
screamo_neve 12
I think 16 was trying to say that that would be worse than not having sex in 3 years...
Liimitless 6
^thank you
Dracoboxer357 36
(Bows head in shame) Lol!!! Caught in a moment of my own ignorance! I owe you a coffee, Liimitless. ;) Sorry!
fl4evr 0
Hahahahah
lindseykcool 6
I apologize, Liimitless. I misunderstood also. :)
IrishJesus 5
Just going to be playing devils advocate: Assuming you are female, it should be pretty easy to find someone to get nasty with. I'm curious what you are doing that's making it difficult to get some.
benderbot19 0
Standards?
naddification 7
Self-worth?
DKjazz 20
Too much self-worth or not enough?
xoxPatrina 8
Could be worse... Could have a blue waffle..
Liimitless 6
Ew
carlosantana0219 2
I guess you're speaking from experience
xoxPatrina 8
Not at all. I'm a virgin.
xoxPatrina 8
Na, I'm a virgin.... Nice try though.
JhunnySuperman 0
Hahaha wow in all ways that's the most disgusting example
IrishJesus 5
don't worry about it. Everyone has different needs.
KafkasKatfish 2
A feeling I know all too well.
testthecoal 5
You are destined for someone. Just dont't become one of those crazy pet lovers.
Hilljack3 2
Yea that sucks. But. Oh well lol
FMLsOhilarious 6
Wow, and she thinks two weeks is a long time? Unless she's in a relationship with someone then I guess I see her point but if not and she's just screwing random people, then that's a bit ****-like and you shouldn't compare yourself to that. It's better to wait for someone worth while; at least that's what I think.
ohmandapants 17
When my ex and I broke up, it was hard not having sex for a few months. But you get used to it. So maybe OP's friend was in a relationship with a rather healthy sex life, and she suddenly doesn't have that anymore. She could **** around I suppose. I couldn't bring myself to that though, maybe she can't either.