Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I discovered that I climax sooner if I think about pretzels. Yes, pretzels. The food product. I'll never be able to eat them again. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I remembered I had a Reese's Krispy Kreme doughnut in the car. I orgasmed while thinking about a doughnut. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML
Today, I got sexually excited thinking about what kind of donuts I wanted to get in the morning. FML
Today, I caught myself thinking about what to cook for dinner tonight. During sex. FML
Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML
Today, during sex, my boyfriend stopped and asked if he could eat a sandwich while we do it. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML
Today, after telling my boyfriend I was willing to try just about anything to revive our sex life, he confessed to having a swirly fetish. FML
Today, I was listening to a local radio station, and they did a segment called "food porn." As they were sexually describing various types of food, I actually found myself getting turned on over a pizza. FML
Today, I realized how sex-deprived I am when the thought of owning condoms gave me a rock-solid erection. FML
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Top comments
josef_connolly 14
Maybe you should just date pretzels then.
drayloon 50
Don't get all twisted out of shape over it
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Comments (89)
123765 18
Mmm pretzel fetish
FunGhoost 10
Foodgasmic!
Steve95401 49
Maybe it's thinking about Auntie Anne that's getting you off.
bigmike25 11
I love Auntie Anne!
siggy_mcsigx 22
hrrrfffff their pretzel dogs..........
rekkas 16
That's hilarious!
homesuckfucker 28
Don't give up on something you love because it gives you an ******. That's the opposite of what you should do.
3molliver3 16
Doesn't matter had sex (and a tasty snack).
Xeivan 15
lmao! Bravo!
weveallbeenthere 30
you should eat them all the time and think about your boyfriend while eating them.
jesse98 7
Hahaha, you should make him dress like a pretzel
marcus3695 3
no
salvorican 24
So... If you're alone and eating pretzels... Is that your way of masturbating?