Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I was in the middle of giving my boyfriend head, he looked at me and said "Eat that cockmeat sandwich." He seriously thought it was a turn on. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job. I thought it was going great and I was doing a good job, until he told me to "stop chomping on it like it's a hot dog." FML
Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "Eat it, eat it!" FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML
Today, my boyfriend yawned while I was giving him head. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob. I was laying in between his legs because it's just more comfortable. I looked down, and he had pieces of toilet paper sticking out of his butt cheeks. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. Soon, I noticed he was being very quiet. When I looked up, he was in a deep sleep. FML
Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to ask if I wanted to get donuts. FML
Today, trying to be sexy I was sucking on my boyfriends fingers. I was really starting to turn him on, when I noticed something crunchy in my mouth. Turns out, he went digging for treasure up his nose earlier. I found the treasure in my mouth. FML
Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML
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Top comments
CitizenSnipz 0
Both of you were eating a delicious snack filled with cream. He was just seeing how it was for you!
doctorr_fml 9
that blows
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Comments (219)
Tbagface 0
lol you clearly wernt very good :-P
megasoreass 0
ya she was not as goood as me
kookat195 0
what a ******* asshole. and who the **** eats a twinky while getting head?! I truly feel sorry for you and no I am not a girl
responses 0
ahahahahahahahahahaha that's hilarious
TiffanyBlews27 0
why would you ******' eat a twinkie while gettin' head?!?!? is he ducked up in the head or somethin'?!?
BadPinkKitty07 0
cuz twinkies are awesome, that's why!
yashack 0
that man is a genius!!!!
Cobra731 0
totally just lol'd.
BirdIzDuhWord 0
That sounds like something I would do.
Googolman 29
How does one "look up sexily"?
PCH 5
Wow... just wow.
Alpha35 4
i don't know if u know but WOW spelled backwards is amazingly WOW... and HAHA twinkies are good shit ........ but seriously were all mature adults..... twinkies are eaten before getting head or after
Hunts160 5
rats live on no evil star spelled backwards is rats live on no evil star.
doctorr_fml 9
that blows
spencenaz 0
pun not funny.
ScaryyMary 14
You mean not pun-ny. :D
Dukaness 0
LOLOL
waterynuggets 0
I guess homeboy will be hitting the sofa tonight. And the only 3 holes that got filled were the ones in the twinkie. I'm punny. Bwahaha.
gamelow 0
nice
Freddo5 0
literally
lindsaylikeomg 0
does he have ADD? clearly he was a little distracted..
elcartel 0
stfu u stupid blond
KevinDidYourMom 0
Lol!
Foxracingluver 0
Twinkie are good
CitizenSnipz 0
Both of you were eating a delicious snack filled with cream. He was just seeing how it was for you!
Sunnytweet79 0
LOL !!
prydeboi16 0
hahaha
Tayman24 0
wow nice
cremesar 0
ahhaha wow.. thats mad funny.
darkshadows_0801 0
that is Sooo funny.
Nakedsquirrel 5
How do you know he wasn't talking about eating a Twinkie while getting head? Those might've been his two favorite things!
Emrysa 1
This. As a fan of Tallahassee from Zombieland, your FLM, IMMD.
halotron 0
Seriously, maybe he was going for the trifecta. Was he watching sportscenter too?
CitizenSnipz 0
creamy on the inside. twinkies are just like dicks!