Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I discovered that I climax sooner if I think about pretzels. Yes, pretzels. The food product. I'll never be able to eat them again. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I remembered I had a Reese's Krispy Kreme doughnut in the car. I orgasmed while thinking about a doughnut. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML
Today, I got sexually excited thinking about what kind of donuts I wanted to get in the morning. FML
Today, I caught myself thinking about what to cook for dinner tonight. During sex. FML
Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML
Today, during sex, my boyfriend stopped and asked if he could eat a sandwich while we do it. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML
Today, after telling my boyfriend I was willing to try just about anything to revive our sex life, he confessed to having a swirly fetish. FML
Today, I was listening to a local radio station, and they did a segment called "food porn." As they were sexually describing various types of food, I actually found myself getting turned on over a pizza. FML
Today, I realized how sex-deprived I am when the thought of owning condoms gave me a rock-solid erection. FML
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Top comments
josef_connolly 14
Maybe you should just date pretzels then.
drayloon 50
Don't get all twisted out of shape over it
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Comments (89)
kk33 4
These pretzels are makin' me...Oh!
lil_ham1644 29
Beer cheese!!
Chey24 6
The hard or the soft ones? ;)
Sklinetobe88 11
What ever makes you happy. Just enjoy your new found fetish ☺
nialls_girl 13
Why would that make pretzels a bad thing?
Seashells77 25
Hey at least you know what works for you. That's definitely not the weirdest thing I've ever heard of.
datgurllllukno 9
Still haven't eaten pretzels...or had sex again. I've officially weirded myself out to the point of depression.
DesignerVagina 4
Well that was very unexpected
timakramer 14
Well that actually makes sense. My guess is that your brain really really wanted some god damn pretzels at that moment and so the thought of pretzels gave your brain some of those pleasure juices. Mix sex with that and viola! AWESOMENESS!!!
DalekWarrior26 9
guess you had a literal foodgasm