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Today, I was grocery shopping. When I got to the frozen foods, I saw some lean pockets, which I haven't had in forever, so I bought a couple of boxes. Around lunch time, I was hungry and thought I could have some, until I realized why I stopped buying them: I don't have a microwave. FML

#20908021
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22436) - you deserved it (37890)

On 10/05/2013 at 4:17am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up to shit on my floor and my cat hiding under my comforter. I have to get rid of my new fish because my cat is afraid of it. FML

#13581194
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22435) - you deserved it (2955)

On 10/24/2010 at 8:36pm - animals - by danjoylovefun - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went for a job interview. Before giving me a tour, the manager pointed to my purse and said, "Better leave that in my office." I didn't know why it was safer in her office than on my shoulder, but I complied. Later, I went to buy coffee and discovered that all my cash was missing. FML

#20086342
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22432) - you deserved it (3483)

On 09/24/2012 at 6:48am - work - by NoMoney4Me (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend decided to break the news that she wanted us to be "just friends." However, she did it not in just any old way - while ice-skating. I'm currently in hospital getting stitches in my arm after I tripped in shock and she ran me over. FML

#20173269
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22428) - you deserved it (1409)

On 11/22/2012 at 12:35am - love - by Ice cold (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, we found out where our daughter had been hiding her crayons. We also found out why our stereo stopped working. FML

#18619223
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22426) - you deserved it (2637)

On 12/26/2011 at 9:24pm - kids - by Peter - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was jumped and savagely beaten to the ground by a group of six-year-olds wearing Disney princess masks. FML

#19641324
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22426) - you deserved it (5967)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:13am - kids - by 23yearoldtoddler - United States

Today, after spending five years regaining contact with my estranged father, I finally met him. I tearfully dropped my luggage and ran to hug him. He belched and told me to get in the car, because he had diarrhea. FML

#19997087
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22424) - you deserved it (2128)

On 08/01/2012 at 8:06pm - love - by daddydaughterWTF - United States (Florida)

Today, I wrote the girl I love a long, gushy letter to convince her to be with me instead of her abusive ex. Later on, I asked her what she thought. She said she can't read cursive. She chose the ex. FML

#20046039
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22423) - you deserved it (3734)

On 08/28/2012 at 10:16am - love - by tutusaurus - United States (California)

Today, in the middle of sex my boyfriend asked if he could use the bathroom. It would've been fine, if he didn't fall asleep on the toilet. FML

#19216663
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22422) - you deserved it (2586)

On 03/04/2012 at 9:00pm - intimacy - by Karen (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML

#20083631
357 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22419) - you deserved it (9114)

On 09/22/2012 at 2:11pm - kids - by SadDad (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had surgery on my arm. My mom has recently had the same surgery and my dad is having his first rib removed and won't be able to move his arm. My family combined now has three functioning arms. FML

#20142449
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22419) - you deserved it (1551)

On 11/01/2012 at 1:08am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got a mass text message from a friend saying she's sorry she can't meet up with our group of friends for drinks because she's busy tonight. This is the first I've heard of any bar-crawling. FML

#17577753
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22416) - you deserved it (2151)

On 08/25/2011 at 2:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was having a driving lesson. I ended up driving so badly that my instructor asked me to stop the car. Not so he could explain my mistakes to me, but so he could get out and vomit. FML

#16951238
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22415) - you deserved it (16635)

On 07/02/2011 at 5:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)



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