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Today, I overheard a conversation between coworkers, during which my name was mentioned, then, "and then I followed her around for a bit, but she didn’t do it again." Everyone laughed. I've no idea what I did that was so funny. FML

#19492319
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20431) - you deserved it (1819)

On 04/18/2012 at 9:15pm - work - by What? (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the police searched my house because my neighbors thought we were aiming a gun with laser sight at them. We were only getting our daft dog to chase a laser light around; we don't even own any guns. FML

#20117729
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20430) - you deserved it (2346)

On 10/15/2012 at 4:33am - misc - by triple l (woman) - United States

Today, my dad found a couple of coins on the floor next to my desk, and gave me a lecture about how money doesn't grow on trees and how irresponsible I am when it comes to money. They were Chuck E. Cheese tokens. FML

#19585247
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20425) - you deserved it (2274)

On 05/07/2012 at 12:12am - money - by rofindie (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I went on a run. Going a decent pace, I passed a woman walking her dog. I joked, "C'mon! Keep up!" Thirty feet later I stepped in mud, rolled my ankle and fell. The woman walked by as I lay in agony, and told me to keep up. FML

#20634623
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20422) - you deserved it (69188)

On 05/01/2013 at 10:27am - misc - by luvs2spooge89 - United States (New York)

Today, I took a cough drop to soothe my sore throat, only to choke, gag, and spend the next ten minutes at the point of vomiting because the bitter lozenge got stuck in my windpipe. FML

#13251603
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20420) - you deserved it (3226)

On 09/29/2010 at 5:29pm - health - by bitter cherry - United States (Minnesota)

Today, it's been one week since my demented grandma babysat my five-year-old daughter while my husband took me to a fancy restaurant. Now she's taken to screaming and calling me a "damn commie" whenever I discipline or say no to her. FML

#19102650
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20418) - you deserved it (5150)

On 02/17/2012 at 7:58pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a small kid looked at me, screamed in terror, and hid behind his dad. I was just walking down the same aisle in the store. This is far from the first time it's happened. FML

#20051755
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20416) - you deserved it (2707)

On 09/01/2012 at 12:07am - kids - by KidKillah - United States (California)

Today, after working all week on a group project, I realized I forgot to submit the assignment and missed the deadline. I now have to tell my group that we automatically failed. FML

Today, my roommate decided to turn off all appliances in the house to "save" electricity. This included the refrigerator. FML

#20088101
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20414) - you deserved it (1292)

On 09/25/2012 at 1:13pm - misc - by Jograd - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while on the bus, I took out my breath spray. The elderly lady beside me thought it was pepper spray. She panicked and started screaming, which culminated in the man near her punching me in the jaw. FML

#20037445
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20413) - you deserved it (1534)

On 08/23/2012 at 12:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was assigned to work on a huge project with Michael. Michael refers to himself in the third person, constantly mumbles unintelligibly to himself, doesn't smile, laugh or make eye contact, and refuses to address me directly. I'll be stuck with him for about four months. FML

#19855807
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20412) - you deserved it (1966)

On 06/27/2012 at 12:53pm - work - by NoMagicMike (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was outside searching for "treasures" with my son using small plastic shovels. All of a sudden he starts screaming. He dug up the bones of our old dog. I told him that we had sent him away to live on a farm, I even helped my son write letters to the farm owners. FML

#640480
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20409) - you deserved it (86047)

On 03/27/2009 at 9:05am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Austria (Vorarlberg)

Today, I swapped a shift so I didn't have to work on new year's eve. An hour later I realized I didn't have anyone to spend it with. I swapped it back. I'll be ringing in the new year with my boss. FML

#14379512
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20409) - you deserved it (3723)

On 12/29/2010 at 5:18am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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