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Today, my mom asked all the old ladies in her church to pray that I meet "someone special". FML

#1104
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19845) - you deserved it (1748)

On 01/14/2009 at 9:26am - love - by beekie9 - United States (Illinois)

Today, while at a pool party, I found out the reason I got my new, white bikini at such a bargain price; it goes completely transparent when wet. I only realized this after everyone was staring at me and whistling. FML

#20119331
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19844) - you deserved it (11224)

On 10/16/2012 at 7:28am - misc - by bargainshopper (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I had to sit patiently at the checkout at work, listening to my own father rant about how the twinkies he was buying were "twice the size back in my day", and how "you could buy a dozen of these suckers for just 10 cents." He didn't stop there. No, he tried to haggle over the price. FML

#18092215
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19840) - you deserved it (1996)

On 10/27/2011 at 9:48pm - work - by Angelica (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my morning sickness was so bad that I threw up everywhere, just from thinking about the pretend meal that a kid had made for me. FML

#19787882
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19840) - you deserved it (2274)

On 06/14/2012 at 4:40pm - misc - by eeeee (woman) - United States

Today, I took my cat to the vet's. When the vet took her temperature anally, I couldn't stop laughing. The vet had to ask me to leave the room. FML

Today, at a fancy dress party, I got off with Hitler. FML

#17277146
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19839) - you deserved it (36104)

On 07/27/2011 at 3:23am - intimacy - by SallyGeen (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I had to get a prostate exam. Right before the doctor started, he told me that if I found it awkward at all, I should just imagine I was being probed by aliens. FML

#19603388
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19838) - you deserved it (1949)

On 05/10/2012 at 5:22pm - health - by Jesse (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom bitched me out, calling me a selfish pig and saying that the reason I don't have a girlfriend is because I'm so conceited. All of this because I started watching the latest episodes of Breaking Bad without her. FML

#20026224
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19839) - you deserved it (3471)

On 08/17/2012 at 10:27am - misc - by elijah (man) - United States

Today, marks the second week straight without sex. Being a newlywed isn't as great as I thought. FML

#7007388
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19834) - you deserved it (3837)

On 12/29/2009 at 2:12am - intimacy - by marriagesux - United States

Today, my deranged co-worker sent me a text message containing a picture that she just took of her uncle. It was his funeral. FML

#9083154
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19832) - you deserved it (1629)

On 03/14/2010 at 8:20pm - misc - by thanatophobia - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was lying on my recliner watching TV when I dropped the remote under the footrest. I got down on my hands and knees and pushed the footrest into the chair. The moment I touched the remote, the footrest deployed and hit me square in the face. FML

#13035925
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19832) - you deserved it (5525)

On 09/13/2010 at 3:33pm - misc - by Joplin - United Kingdom

Today, I tried to send my boyfriend a sexy picture. I took a close up picture of my face, and, trying to be sexy, had my naked body reflected on a mirror in the background. First thing he says: "Who the hell is that guy in the background?" FML

#6596856
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19830) - you deserved it (5993)

On 12/04/2009 at 7:48am - intimacy - by Not-so-sexy - United States (Washington)

Today, I got a job in my university library. My job title is technical services. My actual job is pulling off the book label for the scanner and putting a new one on. For six hours a day. FML

#13325308
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19830) - you deserved it (4117)

On 10/05/2010 at 1:16am - misc - by danrocketman - United States (Texas)



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

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