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Today, I was really badly sunburnt, so I put on some after-sun. The only type we have has glitter in it, and now I look like a sparkling tomato. FML

#19755042
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19411) - you deserved it (4909)

On 06/08/2012 at 12:36pm - health - by miss tomato (woman) - United States

Today, I was talking to my fellow coworker about how nervous I was about sleeping with this guy I really liked. She's been constantly giving me advice about him for months, but today she said "Oh don't worry, he isn't that good in bed anyway." FML

#6293770
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19410) - you deserved it (2704)

On 11/13/2009 at 10:02pm - intimacy - by taurus05 (woman) - United States

Today, while shopping with my mother, she handed me a frozen turkey to put in the cart, but ended up swinging it into my nuts instead. I feel like a giant battered eggplant, and I think I'm now impotent. FML

#8774277
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19410) - you deserved it (2933)

On 03/02/2010 at 2:57pm - health - by beateneggs - United States (Connecticut)

Today, the gas company came to connect our stove for free. While here, they broke our hot water heater, shut it off, and issued us a hazard notice. We can fix it, but they won't be able to come back for another two weeks to turn the gas back on. We don't have any hot water until then. FML

#20072391
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19410) - you deserved it (1405)

On 09/15/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I got some spam stating that I'd have no love life in the coming 10 years if I didn't reply to it. So, no different to the last 10 years then. FML

#19556689
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19407) - you deserved it (2391)

On 05/01/2012 at 1:14am - love - by monkeywrench (woman) - United States

Today, I got an email notification from Yahoo! Personals: "Hi, we've found 0 new matches for you". FML

#1495
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19406) - you deserved it (2321)

On 01/17/2009 at 7:40pm - love - by sad sack. - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that "going for a meal and going out clubbing" for New Year's means me cooking for my mates and driving them to the pub. FML

#7042607
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19401) - you deserved it (3099)

On 12/30/2009 at 8:32pm - misc - by stonesober (man) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, after studying all night for an exam, I ran out to catch the bus. On my way to the bus, my hair got caught in a branch for some minutes. Thinking I'd missed the bus but thankfully didn't, I went on. A few minutes later I remembered that my exam had been postponed for 3 hours today. FML

#14133730
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19402) - you deserved it (9310)

On 12/08/2010 at 6:09pm - misc - by gudmarjoh (woman) - Iceland

Today, I was eating at a nice restaurant. Feeling curious, I daringly asked for the surprise "Maiden's Dream" dessert. The waiter came back with a banana between two balls of ice-cream on a plate, and no spoon. FML

#689
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19400) - you deserved it (6995)

On 01/03/2009 at 3:38am - misc - by sm@rtie - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend humped me to the tune of the Imperial March from Star Wars. FML

#7398429
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19398) - you deserved it (5912)

On 01/17/2010 at 1:13pm - intimacy - by ChubbyTubby (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, after threatening my son for weeks that if he didn't clean his room, I would, I went in, equipped with a garbage bag, ready to throw away everything I found, only to discover dozens of empty bottles, two partially empty pizza boxes, Taco Bell wrappers, and cockroaches. FML

#8824498
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19397) - you deserved it (14893)

On 03/04/2010 at 3:01pm - kids - by disguested (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I told my girlfriend's father that I wanted to talk about his daughter. I then went on to tell him I was thinking about 'popping the cherry', instead of 'popping the question'. FML

#7883509
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19394) - you deserved it (11310)

On 02/04/2010 at 7:29pm - intimacy - by stoopidpoop (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my fiancé picked which new house he thinks we should live in based on the fact that the bathroom was set up in such a way that he can drink himself in to a stupor, then use the toilet and puke in the sink at the same time. FML

#8891983
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19393) - you deserved it (5029)

On 03/07/2010 at 12:25pm - love - by ohshit (woman) - United States (Iowa)



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