Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I took off the training wheels of my niece's bike. I tried to show her how to ride it, but she told me to get off because I needed a fat girl's bike. FML

#19510185
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23877) - you deserved it (6090)

On 04/22/2012 at 8:09am - kids - by Mary Kathryn (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom asked me why MS Word keeps underlining some words. After I tried to convince her that you're supposed to put a space after commas, she started yelling at me for making her look stupid. I can never win. FML

#20441192
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23876) - you deserved it (1835)

On 01/03/2013 at 5:36pm - misc - by millavitsa - Ukraine

Today, I got a promotion. I was really excited until I realized that the only friend I had to celebrate with was my pet cat. FML

#13496435
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23875) - you deserved it (4822)

On 10/18/2010 at 7:27am - work - by ktwithaq (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to visit my alcoholic father. He remembered to ask me how my dog Reggie is, but could not remember the name of "my pal." My "pal" is also my wife of four years. FML

#17674515
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23875) - you deserved it (2054)

On 09/05/2011 at 9:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was at a window seat on a bus full of people when I saw a person lying motionless in a gutter. I jumped up, nearly hysterical, screaming for the driver to stop because there was a guy really hurt on the road. An emergency stop and huge commotion ensued. It turned out to be some garbage. FML

Today, my mom came home drunk and yelled at me for 20 minutes for not feeding the cat. We don't have a cat. FML

#20164653
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23874) - you deserved it (1569)

On 11/15/2012 at 7:36pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, it was so cold that I had to put slippers over my slippers. FML

#18207765
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23873) - you deserved it (5769)

On 11/10/2011 at 2:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, our rodent problem was taken care of. I discovered this when my cat projectile-vomited a soggy, death-scented wad of dark fur and tiny organs onto the couch. FML

#18932795
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23873) - you deserved it (2315)

On 01/28/2012 at 10:46am - animals - by tannarox - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend threw my X-box out the window, because I asked her how much she weighs. FML

#14023923
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23872) - you deserved it (50770)

On 11/29/2010 at 2:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, is my 21st birthday. My friends took me to a bar to celebrate, knowing I don't drink. I am now in charge of driving my friends home after they had an awesome night. FML

#13081151
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23872) - you deserved it (8680)

On 09/17/2010 at 12:02am - misc - by happy bday - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I got a nose bleed in the ladies bathroom. An old lady comes out of a stall and says, "Oh, your nose is bleeding. Well I shit my pants. I'm sure it'll come out in the wash." FML

#17100769
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23873) - you deserved it (2244)

On 07/13/2011 at 11:15pm - health - by stephiew - United States (Georgia)

Today, while my husband and I were arguing, he walked away in the middle of my sentence yelling, "Remember babe, you're only my current wife!" FML

#20064293
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23872) - you deserved it (4507)

On 09/09/2012 at 4:34am - love - by JB (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I came home and told my mom that I got the lead in the school musical, which I was very happy about. She pulled me into a hug then said, "But you know you can't really sing, right?" FML

#18644293
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23871) - you deserved it (2592)

On 12/29/2011 at 1:39pm - misc - by tickle spunk - United States (Connecticut)



FML's blog

  • Angie's illustrated FML
  • Here we go again. This week I'm talking to you live from the Paris Japan Expo. I'm dressed up as Bernard from the Sailor Moon series, and I almost got kicked out because my katana wasn't the…

Friday 3 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: