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Today, at daycare, a little girl cussed me out because I didn't have any apple juice left. When I called her parents, they sided with her and cussed me out too. My boss refused to sympathize, and reprimanded me for not making sure we still had apple juice. FML

#20148817
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24433) - you deserved it (2476)

On 11/05/2012 at 12:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my nitwit son infected our family computer with some sort of mad bastard virus after getting fooled by the promise of some non-existent Hannah Montana nudes. FML

#20076697
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24432) - you deserved it (2854)

On 09/17/2012 at 7:25pm - kids - by StupidBerk (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I had to sit in a three-seat truck between my dad and his best friend on a 4-hour trip to Detroit. It was great, besides their incessant crude jokes and stories, including chafing ball sacks, and naming their new radio station, "Chicks With Dicks Radio." FML

#21380298
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24430) - you deserved it (2497)

On 03/23/2015 at 7:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got attacked by my own dog. I don't know what will be harder, telling everyone how my dog thought I was a robber or explaining to them why a 25 year old man owns a poodle. FML

#15766373
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24428) - you deserved it (15631)

On 04/13/2011 at 3:05am - animals - by Username -

Today, I realized the closest I've ever been to being hit on was with a car in the school parking lot. Even then, the guy claimed he "didn't notice" me. FML

#17983991
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24429) - you deserved it (2740)

On 10/14/2011 at 6:40pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my boyfriend said he was going to give me breakfast in bed before he left. He walked over, threw some granola bars on the bed next to me and left. FML

#19505395
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24428) - you deserved it (3724)

On 04/21/2012 at 9:04am - love - by still hungry - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got into a car accident. I got into it because I noticed a flashy new sign on the highway that read "Being an attentive driver prevents car crashes". Thanks for the notice. FML

#6930680
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24427) - you deserved it (6055)

On 12/24/2009 at 11:08pm - health - by RoxMySox - United States (Texas)

Today, my friends decided it would be funny to engage the child locks on the rear doors of my SUV. My SUV has a bolted cage for the dog separating the front from the back. Guess who was locked in their own car for 2 hours? FML

#7194644
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24426) - you deserved it (3901)

On 01/07/2010 at 3:31am - animals - by Archie (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to my girlfriend's parents' house for lunch. I ended up in the bathroom constipated and remembered reading it's easier to "go" if you are squatting. My girlfriend's dad walked in on me perched on the toilet like an owl. FML

#21430214
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24426) - you deserved it (4490)

On 06/22/2015 at 4:58pm - health - by oh no (man) - United States (California)

Today, I attended a job fair for a position at a shop. I was the only one who showed and submitted an application. I didn't get the job. FML

#13090304
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24424) - you deserved it (2914)

On 09/17/2010 at 8:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, working at a daycare centre, when packing up the kids' beds after sleep time, I slipped and landed in a puddle. Of urine. I had no spare pants. I had to wear them for the rest of my shift. FML

#18459141
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24424) - you deserved it (2999)

On 12/08/2011 at 7:40am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend got done with Marine combat training. The first thing he asked for weren't pictures of me but pictures of his car. Missed you too babe. FML

#20198694
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24422) - you deserved it (3057)

On 12/10/2012 at 2:47am - love - by chels (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I came home and saw my roommate had taken out the garbage for the first time in the three years we have lived in the same house. Unfortunately, the bag of laundry I had by the door was taken out with it as well. FML

#13742923
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24421) - you deserved it (3807)

On 11/06/2010 at 8:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)



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