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Today, I had to give a speech in front of my class and during my speech I had to say the words "But six"; however, because of my accent it sounded like "Butt sex". For the remainder of the day I was frequently asked about "Butt sex". FML

#1040
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22431) - you deserved it (2552)

On 01/13/2009 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by Explicit - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my teacher started talking about me quietly to the stuffed cat, called Rufus, that she keeps on her desk. FML

#18763079
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22431) - you deserved it (2054)

On 01/10/2012 at 12:25am - work - by jumbledgirl (woman) - United States

Today, I tried to manscape with some Nair. Nothing helps the pain. FML

#21337697
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22429) - you deserved it (8793)

On 01/15/2015 at 4:05pm - misc - by NairyAGoodIdea (man) - United States

Today, I failed my driving test. I've been a legal driver in my home country for 8 years, but can't pass the test here. FML

#13789947
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22425) - you deserved it (13759)

On 11/10/2010 at 12:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)

Today, I arrived at work to find an email from the manager whom I had bought concert tickets from the night before. He said he had actually sold those tickets to someone else. He still expects to be paid. FML

#8692922
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22424) - you deserved it (1996)

On 02/27/2010 at 3:45pm - work - by mcfaily - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my mother gave me an early Christmas present; a Bissell mop so I can "do a better job" when I "clean her floors". FML

#13462104
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22421) - you deserved it (3570)

On 10/15/2010 at 6:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I decided to go for a run to try and work on getting in shape. Nine steps in, I slipped in some slimy moss, almost broke my hip on the pavement and gashed open my elbow. I'll be surprised if I can walk straight in the morning. FML

#13154158
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22419) - you deserved it (3588)

On 09/22/2010 at 8:11am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Japan

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I brought to her attention a rather large zit on the corner of her mouth. She called me an insensitive prick. I only pointed it out because I didn't want other people to see it and make fun of her. FML

#8624928
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22414) - you deserved it (19094)

On 02/24/2010 at 9:26pm - love - by pickit (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went for a job interview. Before giving me a tour, the manager pointed to my purse and said, "Better leave that in my office." I didn't know why it was safer in her office than on my shoulder, but I complied. Later, I went to buy coffee and discovered that all my cash was missing. FML

#20086342
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22414) - you deserved it (3482)

On 09/24/2012 at 6:48am - work - by NoMoney4Me (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, water turned to wine. That is, my brother put wine in my hamster's water bottle. Very bad idea. FML

#8873623
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22413) - you deserved it (2232)

On 03/06/2010 at 5:44pm - misc - by Lucy (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I discovered that Paolo has a big penis, that he's good in bed and that the hotel sheets still remember it all. Mum, the walls won't get any thicker just 'cause you're on the telephone. FML

#1813
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22411) - you deserved it (1661)

On 01/20/2009 at 12:42am - misc - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was out having a beer with a few friends. After getting a pint, I slipped in a puddle of beer, fell on top of a stranger on the sofa, and knocked my beer upside down on my head. Then, completely soaked, I realized I'd also knocked over the table, spilling its content on a poor girl across it. FML

#12842003
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22410) - you deserved it (8016)

On 08/31/2010 at 6:33pm - misc - by nemi (woman) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, as I sat down for my flight, I realised that the passenger I had to sit next to for the next seven hours was wearing a necklace made from tampon packaging. FML

#19995117
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22409) - you deserved it (1761)

On 07/31/2012 at 7:28pm - misc - by lotd - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)



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