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Today, I went out for lunch with a guy I hadn't seen in a couple of months. He seemed to be staring at my chest quite a bit, but I wasn't too bothered by it. Turns out there was still an XL sticker on my shirt. FML

#20074089
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18997) - you deserved it (5875)

On 09/16/2012 at 3:00am - love - by distracted - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, was my grandmother's funeral and we had to sing. My dad is a horrible singer, and I tried my hardest not to laugh, I turned red faced and tears were falling from my eyes. My step mother held my hand and said that she was in a better place. I couldn't hold it any longer. I laughed my ass off. FML

#4144889
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18991) - you deserved it (46862)

On 07/29/2009 at 9:44pm - misc - by shewholaughsatthedead (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got myself an organ donor card, just to feel wanted. FML

#19190899
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18990) - you deserved it (4694)

On 02/29/2012 at 7:09pm - misc - by Vandrefalk - Norway

Today, a pigeon got into my apartment. After knocking over a very expensive vase, it panicked, rammed itself against a window, and shat all over the floor as it tried to get out. FML

#19611512
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18987) - you deserved it (1746)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:01pm - animals - by Eric Ngan - Singapore

Today, I found out that the woman from My Strange Addiction who can't stop picking her scabs is married. I've been single for two years and I don't even pick my nose. FML

#20179069
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18985) - you deserved it (2967)

On 11/25/2012 at 11:39pm - love - by Sam (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, the girl I've been hitting on for months on MSN and that I'm about to meet told me "I know you are in love, and you know I'm not". Erm, no, I didn't know. FML

#464
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18984) - you deserved it (4360)

On 12/07/2008 at 3:46am - love - by Titanic - Sent from mobile version

Today, my dad walked in to the arena where I was watching a hockey game with my boyfriend and his friends. My dad was wearing a crazy grey mohawk wig/hat. Meanwhile, my boyfriend just finished telling me how embarassing it would be to be that guy's kid. FML

#2451
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18983) - you deserved it (1616)

On 01/24/2009 at 2:47pm - misc - by lizard - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my ex-boyfriend came over to visit. Being nice, I let him walk down the stairs first, following after him. I still managed to reach the bottom before he did; after taking one step, I lost my footing and fell all the way down, scraping the skin off my arms and legs, and bruising my butt. FML

#14011606
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18984) - you deserved it (4210)

On 11/28/2010 at 12:17pm - misc - by brelni - United States (North Carolina)

Today, it's day two of my family's camping trip. Despite the weather, bugs, and portapotties, we were doing okay, until the can opener broke. My husband is stubbornly insisting that we live off cereal and peanut butter for another five days. FML

#19766054
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18983) - you deserved it (2736)

On 06/10/2012 at 3:19pm - misc - by Danielle (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, at work this woman came up to my counter and handed me gold top covered in gold sequins. I like to chat with the customers sometimes at work so I got all excited and said "Ooh! You shopping for Halloween?" She gave me the biggest death stare. Turns out she wasn't shopping for Halloween. FML

#5886386
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18980) - you deserved it (15063)

On 10/18/2009 at 9:38pm - work - by moduschic (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was chatting online with several relatives, discussing our family reunion. Bored out of my mind, I clicked to rename the conversation to "Boring shit with almost dead people." I didn't know it'd rename it for everyone. FML

Today, I got up on stage excited to recite a spoken word piece that I worked on and memorized for about 20 hours, neglecting other obligations like studying for an exam the next day. I blanked out in the middle of the performance in front of hundreds of people. FML

#8962343
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18971) - you deserved it (6034)

On 03/10/2010 at 12:00am - misc - by KJS (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was completely naked in my boyfriend's bed. Suddenly his mom yelled that she was coming in so that she could get to the attic. I pulled a blanket up to my neck, hoping she would think I was cold. She had to step over my bra and panties on her way to the attic. FML

#417128
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18965) - you deserved it (83714)

On 03/17/2009 at 5:25pm - intimacy - by sandy (woman) - United States (North Carolina)



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