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Today, I told a patient that we needed to collect a stool sample. I left the room momentarily to retrieve what the patient would need. He apparently didn't need anything besides the counter in the exam room. FML

#19951695
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20448) - you deserved it (1912)

On 07/17/2012 at 8:54pm - work - by TimeForACareerChange (man) - United States

Today, I had just finished riding my bike when I ran into the girl I am secretly in love with. While I walked over to her I got an erection through my spandex biking shorts. FML

#8730305
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20446) - you deserved it (9426)

On 02/28/2010 at 9:15pm - intimacy - by hornyloser770 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got a tattoo of the snake and staff medical symbol on my wrist. Now everyone keeps asking what illness I have; they think it's a medical bracelet substitute. FML

#20666917
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20446) - you deserved it (36681)

On 05/16/2013 at 11:01am - misc - by Calaraphea (woman) - United Kingdom (Warrington)

Today, my drunk boyfriend decided to try to serenade me by throwing rocks at my window and singing a song about how much he loves me. This would have been extremely sweet if he would have gotten my window instead of my dad's. FML

#20050638
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20445) - you deserved it (1938)

On 08/31/2012 at 6:16am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, a student of mine used the phrase "well, you know, like back in your day" about defining "going out". I'm only 24. FML

#1158
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20444) - you deserved it (1787)

On 01/14/2009 at 6:20pm - kids - by Old? - United States (Washington)

Today, the only card I got for Valentine's Day was in my mother's handwriting, and she posted it through the front door herself. She still won't admit it's from her. FML

#19072071
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20446) - you deserved it (2327)

On 02/14/2012 at 6:56am - love - by ThanksMum (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend was complaining about how we never see the movies he wants to see. So I took him to the movies, and he picked which one. Then he fell asleep. FML

#19433649
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20444) - you deserved it (2304)

On 04/08/2012 at 11:29pm - love - by Stinky. - United States (Illinois)

Today, I took a major test, worth half my grade, not realizing that there were questions on the back of the sheet. FML

#18192880
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20443) - you deserved it (33727)

On 11/08/2011 at 12:58pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to see my new dentist. He was really cute, so after the checkup I started flirting. He stopped me right after I asked him out, saying, "Being a dentist has its advantages, I can see the girl's mouth before I stick my tongue in it. And in your case, it's a big no." FML

#20470654
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20436) - you deserved it (40942)

On 01/21/2013 at 1:32am - love - by black and yellow - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to my 22-year-old boyfriend that mice do not grow up to be rats. FML

#20096649
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20434) - you deserved it (2359)

On 10/01/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, to keep me from "getting fatter", my roommate raided the kitchen. She ate everything from cookies and ice cream to deli meat. The only thing left in the house are vegetables. FML

#17936409
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20434) - you deserved it (15823)

On 10/08/2011 at 4:40pm - health - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend told me that she woke up after yesterday’s party with someone else’s trousers. FML

#562
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20431) - you deserved it (1837)

On 12/21/2008 at 4:40am - love - by Yudor - Sent from mobile version

Today, it's my sixteenth birthday and my mom promised me she'd buy me a car. She came home with a toy lego car. FML

#8169193
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20431) - you deserved it (18278)

On 02/12/2010 at 2:24pm - misc - by RaceCar (man) - United States (Alabama)



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