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Today, my 12 year-old dog died. My boyfriend's attempts to comfort me involved him muttering, "At least she knows how to play dead now." FML

#20071617
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23706) - you deserved it (2081)

On 09/14/2012 at 12:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a very pretty girl came up to me and asked me for my phone number. Very pleased, I give it to her with a huge smile and tell her that I can be reached at any time. I then watch her go back to her group of friends. My number was for her gay friend, who then meekly waved at me. FML

#718
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23706) - you deserved it (2808)

On 01/06/2009 at 6:58am - love - by musamalia - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend asked me to beat him up so he could look tough around his friends. When I just stared at him, he added, "Please don't break anything though. Nothing too serious." FML

#17845836
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23702) - you deserved it (3242)

On 09/27/2011 at 4:28am - health - by toughbf (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, when I was ordering pizza, I got a text from my mom saying "I love you". When the man thanked me I accidentally said, "I love you too." FML

#19719938
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23702) - you deserved it (4811)

On 06/02/2012 at 8:47am - misc - by lol112 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was riding my bike, when I saw a large dog sitting in front of a house. I started to really crank the pedals, figuring that by the time it saw me, I'd be long gone. My chain popped off, I lost control and crashed onto the side of the road. The dog hadn't moved. It was a statue. FML

#20510258
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23702) - you deserved it (19433)

On 02/17/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mother-in-law said I wasn't the type she expected her son to marry, as he's always dated cheerleaders and model types. I must have looked offended, so she added, "I mean they weren't smart like you." So, I might be smart but I'm the ugliest girl my husband has ever been with. FML

#19879190
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23701) - you deserved it (2713)

On 07/02/2012 at 1:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my roommate woke me up during afternoon nap to tell me that I need to move out. His reason: "Our political differences will likely escalate to violence." FML

#12842541
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23701) - you deserved it (2840)

On 08/31/2010 at 7:13pm - misc - by NowHomeless (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I reached a new low in my relationship: my boyfriend got so drunk I had to help him take a piss. FML

#18979126
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23698) - you deserved it (5477)

On 02/02/2012 at 8:02pm - love - by lillymean (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, it's Saturday. While all my friends go out to have fun, I get my excitement thinking about how I'll be sleeping with a new pillow. FML

#6733477
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23697) - you deserved it (6118)

On 12/13/2009 at 2:14am - misc - by soy_un_perderdor (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my therapist told me that I need to do something different with my hair. Then I paid her. FML

#14894190
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23697) - you deserved it (5124)

On 02/08/2011 at 9:46am - health - by mmromig - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, my neighbor brought a ruined napkin holder over and claimed that we drilled a hole through his wall and ruined it. I apologized, not telling him that it was actually a bullet that my boyfriend shot through the wall. FML

#20974338
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23697) - you deserved it (37588)

On 11/29/2013 at 12:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I visited my grandparents' house. While getting a drink from the fridge, I noticed the Christmas card my family sent them had my face scratched out. When I confronted them about it, they said it was the cat. They don't have a cat. FML

#20445318
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23696) - you deserved it (1853)

On 01/06/2013 at 7:50pm - misc - by HatedGrandson - United States

Today, I got l disconnect notices for both my water and my electric. After looking over my budget, I realized that I can only pay for one until next month. FML

#7106186
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23695) - you deserved it (6866)

On 01/02/2010 at 3:27pm - money - by troubled - Sent from mobile version



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