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Today, I went out with a girl I like. After a movie, we went to McDonald's. There was this couple making out. The girl I was with remarked about how lame it would be to go to McDonald's on a date. I thought we were on a date. FML

#14780343
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22022) - you deserved it (33825)

On 01/30/2011 at 10:13pm - love - by gotnogame (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was planning on enjoying my one day off work from the hospital, at home. I got a call saying I had to come in because my department was short-handed. I went in to find almost everyone there. Turns out it was a prank by my coworkers. FML

#20148851
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22022) - you deserved it (1426)

On 11/05/2012 at 12:33pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I bought medical gloves to protect my hands from various chemicals at work since I have eczema. I had an allergic reaction to the gloves, and now my eczema is even worse. FML

#19336700
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22022) - you deserved it (2416)

On 03/24/2012 at 1:41am - health - by retyi43 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was jogging around the neighborhood when I saw an old man on his porch. Being friendly, I waved at him as I ran by. Apparently his idea of greeting someone is pelting them with stones. FML

#18087058
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22021) - you deserved it (2416)

On 10/27/2011 at 4:06am - misc - by unlucky - United States (Texas)

Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML

#17709124
588 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22021) - you deserved it (243707)

On 09/10/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was greeting customers at work. After saying good morning to one man, he stopped and looked at me from head to toe before smirking and saying, "Mmmm." He then turned around and said, "It's starting." It's only my first day. FML

#18912868
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22018) - you deserved it (2411)

On 01/25/2012 at 11:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, as part of the treatment for my bulimia, my doctor informed me that I will not be allowed to go to the bathroom unsupervised. Meaning there will have to be another person in the bathroom with me at all times. I have a nervous bladder. I couldn't go if I wanted to. FML

#17977413
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22017) - you deserved it (12537)

On 10/13/2011 at 8:07pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, a woman stopped me and started chewing me out for wearing a pentagram necklace. I explained to her that is wasn't a pentagram, it was a Star of David. She continued chewing me out because apparently that still means I hate Jesus. FML

#20097322
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22015) - you deserved it (2185)

On 10/01/2012 at 8:11pm - misc - by raz (woman) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, while I was standing in the elevator with a few people I just met when I moved in yesterday, I felt something fall on my hair and dusted it off. It was a cockroach. None of them will come within a 1m distance to me now, because they all think I've got lice. Welcome to the building! FML

#8713665
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22014) - you deserved it (2073)

On 02/28/2010 at 8:44am - misc - by idonthavelice (woman) - China (Guangdong)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. He suddenly pulls away, and goes, 'OMNOMNOMNOM' then continues kissing me. FML

#8938821
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22013) - you deserved it (20705)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:43am - love - by anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was talking to a group of friends about the various problems in Africa. One of them interrupts me and asks with a straight face, "If it's so bad over there, why don't they all just leave?" FML

#19264925
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22009) - you deserved it (3580)

On 03/12/2012 at 3:48pm - misc - by dumbfriend - United States

Today, it's the last day of my sign language class. At the end of the class, my teacher surprised us by speaking for the first time, also surprising everyone that she wasn't actually deaf. It wouldn't have been so bad had I not just given someone an answer to the test, thinking she couldn't hear me. FML

Today, my ex-girlfriend was supposed to pick up her things. I decided to take a nap. Thirty minutes later, I woke up with two police officers hammering on my door. They'd come to get my ex-girlfriend's things and said they were "watching me." That's the last time I date a cop's daughter. FML

#20170390
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22003) - you deserved it (2914)

On 11/20/2012 at 12:03am - love - by Chris (man) - United States (Washington)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

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  • The Best of the Worst #11
  • Yes, we're late. We've been doing stuff, the New Year and our birthday party got in the way, but there's no excuse. So, we're sorry for not churning out another Best of the Worst in due…

Wednesday 28 January 2015

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