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Today, the highlight of my day was a conversation about Disney, which ranged from Pocahontas lunch boxes to Disneyland Paris. I don't know who was more excited; me, a 20 year old man, or the 6 year old girl I was talking to. FML

#13876997
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19709) - you deserved it (7303)

On 11/17/2010 at 2:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I was forced to spend an extra $318 for another plane ticket to Dallas. The ticket wasn't for my daughter, my mom, or my sister, but for the quarter of my butt that apparently needs its own seat. FML

#12841369
346 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19706) - you deserved it (63739)

On 08/31/2010 at 5:40pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. Apparently my nose hair scares him. FML

#19238495
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19707) - you deserved it (12067)

On 03/08/2012 at 9:30am - love - by hairy (woman) - Serbia

Today, I realized just how bad my problem with making eye contact is, when I caught myself looking the other way when the singer in a music video looked directly at the camera. FML

#19522218
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19706) - you deserved it (4313)

On 04/24/2012 at 2:49pm - misc - by suhleedah18 - United States

Today, my mother yelled at me for standing too close to the microwave. Her reason? The radiation was going to seep through, kill my sperm and cause cancer. FML

#18956163
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19703) - you deserved it (4529)

On 01/30/2012 at 9:34pm - misc - by dumb mother (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate for the first time. He was sucking on my boob, everything was going good. He suddenly stopped and started choking really bad. He thought milk was coming out. Turns out, it was just his gum. The moment was ruined. FML

#7162537
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19703) - you deserved it (3143)

On 01/05/2010 at 11:22am - intimacy - by me (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I missed multiple calls from the company I applied to. That was the supervisor calling, wanting to hire me. I then remembered my idiotic voicemail I made months ago where I pretended to answer and say stupid stuff for 5 minutes. I don't think I'm going to get the job. FML

#20627029
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19702) - you deserved it (49703)

On 04/28/2013 at 5:09am - work - by stupid voicemails - United States (Hawaii)

Today, during a basketball game, I fell into metal chairs which then decided to fold in, causing me to fall to the floor in a very dramatic and painful fall. When I stood up, so did everyone else and they were all clapping, including the other team. FML

#7925072
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19700) - you deserved it (2943)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:25am - health - by aurorason - Sent from mobile version

Today, before setting off on my train journey I checked my booking. The (non-refundable) return date was a week later than I intended, and after buying a new ticket online, I was informed that I would be able to collect it in 2 hours. I leave in an hour. I'll have to pay three times to come home. FML

#15225098
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19698) - you deserved it (11346)

On 03/07/2011 at 12:38am - money - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that what I thought could be a life-threatening issue causing me chest pains was only because I over-obsessed about it. Now not only do I have social anxiety, but I get so anxious I can create fake illnesses. FML

#18314342
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19699) - you deserved it (5619)

On 11/22/2011 at 3:08am - health - by daybyday - Australia

Today, I received the 'special' present my mother had sent me for my 21st birthday. I opened the box and saw that my mother had picked out, accessorized and shipped to me, in college, a doll. FML

#14740703
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19699) - you deserved it (3931)

On 01/28/2011 at 5:54am - misc - by Florida_1827 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him, saying that the only thing he would change about me is my last name. I later told him that I wanted to keep my last name after the marriage. I'm now single again. FML

#19624313
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19696) - you deserved it (37561)

On 05/14/2012 at 9:09pm - love - by singleagain (woman) - United States

Today, I was on a stationary bike at the gym. I got into a conversation with a very attractive female gym-friend. I felt something cool "down below". I looked down and saw one of my testicles had sneaked out of a hole in my shorts, I quickly looked up only to see her staring at the same thing. FML

#6665165
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19698) - you deserved it (4341)

On 12/08/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by fatguyinalittlecoat (man) - United States (Illinois)



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