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Today, I finally received a paycheck for the first time in six months. I celebrated by promptly falling down a flight of stairs and losing consciousness. FML

#6422914
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26822) - you deserved it (4864)

On 11/23/2009 at 5:12pm - work - by DBR (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I watched my car roll backwards on the freeway, while attached to the tow truck that I was sitting in. FML

#6144396
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26821) - you deserved it (2319)

On 11/03/2009 at 11:06pm - misc - by ljd09 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a very intoxicated man came in to my workplace and bought 50 dollars worth of yogurt, talked about the fact that he shouldn't have to wear pants in public, then threw up all over the register. FML

Today, I rang British Gas to cancel my boiler cover, as I'm totally and utterly skint. I told her the reason was I was getting divorced, moving house, losing my job and had no income at all. She was very sympathetic, and said "how would you like to pay your £37 cancellation fee?" FML

#6343049
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26820) - you deserved it (3807)

On 11/17/2009 at 4:33pm - misc - by shellbom (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I finally used the statistics book that I forked out $120 to buy. To kill an ant. FML

#16706324
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26819) - you deserved it (10910)

On 06/17/2011 at 2:07am - misc - by jaybob18 - United States (New York)

Today, I almost missed the bus. I grabbed my backpack and ran out the door. It wasn't until after we got to school that I realized I was still in my slippers. FML

#16493871
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26819) - you deserved it (9012)

On 06/04/2011 at 2:00am - misc - by Connie - United States (New York)

Today, as the clock struck twelve for the new year, I was in the bathroom having a nosebleed. FML

#14423827
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26816) - you deserved it (3968)

On 01/01/2011 at 10:37am - health - by cauteriseme (woman) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, the man that I have a crush on finally touched me. This would have been great, if not for the fact that it was to roll me on my side while I was having a seizure. FML

#21434226
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26815) - you deserved it (1759)

On 06/30/2015 at 3:51am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my 27 year old boyfriend chose playing with Lego over making sweet love to me. FML

#19363269
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26813) - you deserved it (11464)

On 03/28/2012 at 12:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, as I was walking my dog, two cute girls from my school were walking towards me on the sidewalk. I thought it would be appropriate to wave and give a smile. My dog thought it would be appropriate to viciously bark at and mount one of the girls. FML

#19343644
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26813) - you deserved it (3311)

On 03/25/2012 at 7:59am - animals - by PicklesMcRaptor - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that the piece of vacant land I purchased for $20,000 is illegal to build a house on, due to acreage restrictions. Thank you, realtor. FML

#19860530
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26813) - you deserved it (5354)

On 06/28/2012 at 12:53pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was carrying a hot cup of noodles. I sneezed and accidentally stabbed myself in the forehead with a fork. FML

#8130658
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26809) - you deserved it (5331)

On 02/11/2010 at 1:35pm - misc - by Nick (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went to the waterpark and my kids were fighting so I grounded them both. We concluded the day by boogey boarding on a mechanical wave. There was so much water I didn't realize my boobs had completely fallen out of my bikini. As revenge, my kids didn't tell me. FML

#13823164
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26808) - you deserved it (19827)

On 11/13/2010 at 1:29am - misc - by sandyseashells10 (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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