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Today, I realized that the full body wax I got two weeks ago that my wife told me would look sexy doesn't just make me look like a completely hairless ten-year-old boy. The ingrown hairs everywhere now make me look like someone with chicken pox. FML

#13443862
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20013) - you deserved it (6409)

On 10/14/2010 at 9:05am - health - by mikey - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was talking to a charming young lady on MSN by webcam. She suddenly asked me to take my glasses off for a minute; I did so, and she said, "Oh never mind, you're still just as ugly..." FML

#814
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20012) - you deserved it (2020)

On 01/08/2009 at 2:55am - misc - by neoteck - Sent from mobile version

Today, we got our family pictures back from the printers. I complained to my mom about the ones she picked. "Oh don't worry," she said. "I had them photoshop out your gut." I was talking about my smile. FML

#7292547
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20012) - you deserved it (3145)

On 01/12/2010 at 12:11am - misc - by Me (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, I met my girlfriend's mom. She went on about how my girlfriend's dad is a no good drunk, following this statement with spilling her fifth glass of wine. FML

#19515132
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20010) - you deserved it (1706)

On 04/23/2012 at 1:50am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I took my mom to Victoria's Secret to help her find a bra. She made me try one on to see if it looked good on me. Turns out we have the same cup size. I'm a guy. FML

#17080127
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20011) - you deserved it (47713)

On 07/12/2011 at 12:45pm - misc - by sm702 - United States (Colorado)

Today, I drove 45 minutes to take my full driver's test. At the end of the test, the instructor told me I'd done everything perfectly, but had failed before I left the parking lot. I didn't see the "one way" sign at the entrance. FML

#19996379
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20007) - you deserved it (8286)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:20pm - misc - by unlicensed - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend that I couldn't believe this happened he said, "I'm not going to lie, I didn't always pull out fast." FML

#3711192
374 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20006) - you deserved it (81957)

On 07/13/2009 at 5:17am - intimacy - by air (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, 60 guests for my wedding were supposed to arrive to the Bahamas. The first and only hurricane of the season decided to crash my wedding, stranding my mom, maid of honor and best man. No one will be able to attend my wedding, except the other drunken hotel guests. FML

#20133630
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20006) - you deserved it (3069)

On 10/25/2012 at 11:58pm - misc - by sadbride - Bahamas (New Providence)

Today, a schoolmate I've always secretly hated came over to my place to hang out. She found her way to my room and instantly noticed my dartboard, which I'd taped a picture of her face onto. FML

#21246638
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20005) - you deserved it (41271)

On 08/27/2014 at 6:57pm - misc - by Woops (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I got a text from my roommate asking me if it was cool that my ex was coming over to console him because he's sick. FML

#2860
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19997) - you deserved it (1587)

On 01/27/2009 at 2:41pm - love - by dammed - United States (New York)

Today, I was working out out at the gym doing squats. There was a girl there that I wanted to impress so I loaded up the bar with a lot of weight and began to do my squat. As I was going down I farted so loud that I began to laugh and fell backwards. Everyone in the room just stared at me. FML

#697920
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19995) - you deserved it (68907)

On 03/30/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by Mark (man) - United States

Today, the pharmacist warned me that my antibiotics might cause slight gastrointestinal distress. The fact that I have been on the john for the past 90 minutes drenched in sweat would lead me to believe our definitions of "slight" are a bit different. FML

#20047681
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19995) - you deserved it (1264)

On 08/29/2012 at 9:12am - health - by jdch_99 - United States

Today, at university I was tearing off some "Help Japan" posters off the wall, figuring that they have been up for a while. Just as a group of visiting Japanese reporters passed by. FML



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