Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I discovered I have really bad dandruff. I learned this when I went indoor mini golfing and my whole upper body lit up like a Christmas tree underneath the black light. Among my friends I'm now known as the abominable snowman. FML

#19509348
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20631) - you deserved it (3943)

On 04/22/2012 at 1:24am - health - by Andrew7847 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I decided to help the homeless by giving them old clothes and food. In return, they decided to mug me. FML

#20008267
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20631) - you deserved it (2504)

On 08/07/2012 at 7:45pm - misc - by HazzaBoo - United States

Today, my boss got angry at me because my English is better than his. He accused me of trying to steal his management position, and implied that I'll be lucky if I still have a job by the end of the month. FML

#20054257
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20633) - you deserved it (1384)

On 09/02/2012 at 3:41pm - work - by zoosmell pooplord - Norway (Buskerud)

Today, a train hit me. A slow mini-train full of kindergartners who were on a tour of the museum I was visiting. FML

#19004597
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20624) - you deserved it (5686)

On 02/05/2012 at 9:14pm - health - by MahSquito (man) - United States

Today, my mom was giving me a long lecture about being aware of my surroundings, because you never know what's out there. While she was talking, I noticed a drug deal going down in the Walmart parking lot. She didn't notice. FML

#19626758
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20621) - you deserved it (1977)

On 05/15/2012 at 10:24am - misc - by observant (woman) - United States

Today, I realized the senior thesis I turned in last week uses the word "asses" instead of "assess" 17 times. FML

#1423979
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20620) - you deserved it (57704)

On 04/28/2009 at 2:47pm - misc - by fuckspellcheck (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my son got to my great grandfather's old stopwatch, which had been valued at a very high sum, and broke it by twisting the hands in reverse. He says he was trying to time travel. FML

#19990926
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20618) - you deserved it (3080)

On 07/29/2012 at 2:49pm - kids - by oink oink fuck off - United Kingdom (Doncaster)

Today, I laughed at a joke and it literally took me a minute to realize that it was me they were making fun of. FML

#16114779
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20617) - you deserved it (19627)

On 05/10/2011 at 3:37am - misc - by Nick (man) - Philippines (Quezon City)

Today, I was swimming in my pool with my two sons. A few hours later while on Facebook, I saw that one of them had liked a photo with the caption, "Peeing in a pool, best feeling ever." FML

#19978741
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20617) - you deserved it (2351)

On 07/23/2012 at 12:28am - kids - by poolboy -

Today, I saw my doc about the painful swelling I've had in my arm all week. He seemed totally out of it, and ended up telling me it's all in my head, despite the swelling. When I respectfully suggested it might be a blood issue, he just said "nah". FML

#19288691
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20616) - you deserved it (2050)

On 03/16/2012 at 1:24pm - health - by jarv49 (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I kissed a boy for the first time in over a year. It was at drama club practice, and he quickly ended up asking the director if we could remove that scene from the play. FML

#20114767
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20617) - you deserved it (2248)

On 10/13/2012 at 9:38am - misc - by pinkfreak94 - United States (Ohio)

Today, while at an important meeting at work, I got to watch helplessly as a police officer gave me a parking meter ticket. Added to that my boss chewed me out for "never paying attention and staring out the window during meetings". FML

#15756717
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20615) - you deserved it (9968)

On 04/12/2011 at 3:25pm - work - by Kevin -



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: