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Today, I met my daughter's boyfriend, who she hopes to marry. I asked what he does, to which he answered, "I'm a Flamencologist." Flamencology? The study of Flamenco? Huh? FML

#14838369
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22838) - you deserved it (6374)

On 02/04/2011 at 10:01am - kids - by dancer101 (woman) - United States

Today, I was at the theatre with my 4-year-old son who was situated on my lap. Halfway through the movie, he turns to face me and states loudly, "Mommy, your legs are so furry!". Everyone watching the show turned and stared at us. FML

#6747789
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22838) - you deserved it (8150)

On 12/14/2009 at 1:58am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend at her house and her dad saw us. She decided that she didn't feel like riding along when it was time for her dad to drive me home and went to bed. I, on the other hand, got to have a 15 minute conversation about the merits of "physical boundaries." FML

#7364285
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22837) - you deserved it (5952)

On 01/15/2010 at 7:44pm - misc - by Bali_Boil (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, at my job as a lifeguard, I told a teenager to, "Walk please." He then threw his soda at me as he ran away. We aren't allowed off stand unless it's an emergency, so I baked in that soda for 30 minutes. FML

#19692881
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22836) - you deserved it (3016)

On 05/28/2012 at 10:05am - work - by emonsteadman - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I went mini golfing with his family. We had a competition going on, and when I managed to get two consecutive holes in one, he started seething and muttered that I'm dangerously close to becoming single. FML

#19652024
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22835) - you deserved it (2655)

On 05/20/2012 at 2:20pm - misc - by Jacquelinez (woman) - United States

Today, my cheating, psycho asscricket of an ex texted me and asked me back out. I said no, and didn't think any more of it, at least until an hour later, when I looked out my window, only to see him smearing a bag of dog crap all over my porch. FML

#20020463
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22835) - you deserved it (1858)

On 08/14/2012 at 11:02am - love - by WELLFUCKYOUTOO (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after dieting, rigorous exercising and a major lifestyle change, I have finally reached my fitness goal. My parents were more excited about my 17-year-old brother getting to 3rd base with his girlfriend. FML

#19670300
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22835) - you deserved it (2620)

On 05/23/2012 at 10:47pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, out of partying reflex, I downed Communion wine like a vodka shot. FML

#20830409
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22833) - you deserved it (44200)

On 08/10/2013 at 6:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found my brother tampering with my laptop. He had changed the entire settings, in ways I don't even know how to fix. I finally had to get my mom to threaten him to change it back to its original setting. I'm 15. He's six and can barely get dressed by himself. FML

#13455982
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22832) - you deserved it (8747)

On 10/15/2010 at 4:33am - misc - by fmlforreal - Singapore

Today, I realized that I can still do the splits. Why? Because I fell down an entire flight of stairs, everyone in the hall saw me land and applauded. Someone even shouted "and she sticks the landing." FML

#8965492
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22831) - you deserved it (3225)

On 03/10/2010 at 3:09am - misc - by misty_love (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my boyfriend shared with me his anxiety about death, so I shared with him one of my ridiculously irrational fears. He thought I was making fun of him and now won't talk to me. FML

#18831926
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22831) - you deserved it (4952)

On 01/17/2012 at 1:43am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I put my ironing board away in the bathroom. After closing the door, I heard a loud noise. The board had opened up while falling over, taking up the width of the room. I can't open the door. FML

#19533059
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22831) - you deserved it (3272) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/26/2012 at 4:45pm - misc - by Magicgwen - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got to my weekly drama group a bit late. Everyone looked surprised when I walked in. Casually, I sat down and apologised for being late. I thought everyone looked awkward, probably because it turned out I'd been kicked out of the group. The teacher had decided to announce it before making sure I'd got the email. FML

#13045584
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22830) - you deserved it (3040)

On 09/14/2010 at 4:31am - misc - by a7xforever (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

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FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #12
  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

Tuesday 3 March 2015

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