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Today, I was outside, eating a sandwich, when I noticed a homeless man was standing in front of me. Upon making eye contact, he grabbed the rest of my sandwich and ran off. FML

#13816723
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23982) - you deserved it (4607)

On 11/12/2010 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, a friend of mine sent me a message saying, "Man, I am so sorry but we were both really drunk and I swear it didn't mean anything." FML

#8654882
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23981) - you deserved it (3796)

On 02/26/2010 at 12:07am - misc - by single now - United States

Today, my 2-year-old cat finally decided to start catching mice. Like any other cat would, she left it for me to find. I found it in the middle of the night, as my bare foot rolled its guts out of its ass. FML

#20068907
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23981) - you deserved it (2059)

On 09/12/2012 at 2:31pm - animals - by shadokis (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was jogging when a woman ran out of her house and handed me an invitation for a party. What was the invitation for? A weight loss treatment party. Guess the jogging isn't working. FML

#18362103
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23980) - you deserved it (2763)

On 11/27/2011 at 12:30am - health - by jogger (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realised that I've never been able to successfully cook a meal outside of World of Warcraft. FML

#20841839
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23979) - you deserved it (36395)

On 08/17/2013 at 3:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Thailand (Nonthaburi)

Today, in front of a hospital, I noticed that an old lady was having trouble lighting her cigarette because she had Parkison's. So I went to help her to light it up and she then started chatting with me and told me she had lung cancer. FML

#440
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23978) - you deserved it (6119)

On 12/03/2008 at 1:11am - health - by Anto - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend bought a new toaster. It not only pops up the bread when done, it also beeps loudly. It makes me scream in terror every single time. My boyfriend has now vowed to "Toast 'til the end of time." It's going to be a long year. FML

Today, I found out that my coworker shared a laugh with the boss about setting the office desk on fire (which he actually did), while ten minutes later I was threatened with being fired because I made paper snowflakes and hung a few of them next to the computer. FML

#6308799
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23976) - you deserved it (2183)

On 11/15/2009 at 12:12am - work - by hanmart (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was in the car going to a concert with my family. I was listening to my iPod, when the wheel broke and I couldn't change the song. So for the rest of the trip, I was stuck either listening to my parents arguing, or Don't Worry, Be Happy by Bobby McFerrin on repeat. FML

#12782380
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23976) - you deserved it (5534)

On 08/28/2010 at 2:07am - misc - by dontworrybehappy (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went on a date with a great girl; we went out to dinner and saw a movie. After the movie, we went out to my car to find out that a homeless man had broken the window, climbed into it, and was eating the leftover pasta with his fingers. FML

#20198660
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23976) - you deserved it (1551)

On 12/10/2012 at 2:01am - misc - by Alec (man) - United States

Today, I was discussing my family heritage with my girlfriend's parents. The moment I told them that I came from a German background, her seven-year-old brother pointed at me and yelled, "HITLER!" FML

#3008
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23975) - you deserved it (2607)

On 01/28/2009 at 8:38am - misc - by razzmataz - United States (California)

Today, I got dressed up for the first time in days to go have sushi with a friend. When I walked out to my car, I noticed that the passenger window was shattered and the car robbed. What's worse is I'd forgotten to lock the side doors anyway. FML

#15788112
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23975) - you deserved it (5452)

On 04/14/2011 at 9:09pm - misc - by markyvilla - United States

Today, I'm a graduate but still an unpaid intern. My daily work is folding letters and putting them into envelopes. The sad thing is, I actually enjoy doing it. FML

#16805369
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23975) - you deserved it (7442)

On 06/22/2011 at 8:36pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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