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Today, I got fined when my fat dog decided to walk across a private film set to get at the catering area. FML

#13433237
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19936) - you deserved it (9002)

On 10/13/2010 at 11:28am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, in the flat I share with four students, I broke our toaster. The night before, they'd successfully managed to toast chicken soup-covered crumpets in it whilst drunk. I tried to toast a teacake, and the whole thing exploded in flames and smoke. Our toaster got taken out by a raisin. FML

#17620390
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19935) - you deserved it (3436)

On 08/30/2011 at 10:53am - misc - by gofixmyhead (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, some construction workers kept going in and out the door next to my cubicle. They decided it would be easier to just prop the door open for the next hour. It's 20 degrees outside, and I'm wearing a dress. FML

#14543942
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19934) - you deserved it (6094)

On 01/11/2011 at 9:45am - work - by bitty (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went on a blind date. We had agreed on meeting in front of a park. Thinking I was there first, I texted her "I'm already there, sitting next to the fat chick." I heard a beep. SHE was the "fat chick." FML

#5292418
334 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19934) - you deserved it (93820)

On 09/16/2009 at 2:23pm - love - by sarahh38 (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while working as a massage therapist, a client had me work on a very specific knot in his shoulder. He also happened to have a very detailed, very realistic tattoo of the crucifixion on his shoulder. I just spent 45 minutes violating Jesus. FML

#20173351
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19933) - you deserved it (3581)

On 11/22/2012 at 1:50am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I jokingly asked my boyfriend to marry me, because it's a leap year. He is now avoiding me for fear that I was serious. FML

#19188857
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19931) - you deserved it (14616)

On 02/29/2012 at 1:10pm - love - by CptZoe - United Kingdom (Rotherham)

Today, I used the restrooms at the shopping mall. The cleaning lady stepped in after me, immediately turned around and very demonstratively started spraying air freshener. FML

#14320804
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19929) - you deserved it (5922)

On 12/24/2010 at 5:52am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands

Today, while shopping, I bumped into a guy I knew in high school. He went on about he heard I'd got married, looked like I'd had a baby, and that, "she looks just like you!" The kid was my niece, and my husband broke up with me 2 years ago. Thanks for bringing that up. FML

#19838088
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19929) - you deserved it (4599)

On 06/24/2012 at 6:57am - misc - by thankspal (woman) - United States

Today, I had an in-depth conversation at work about how technically Luke Skywalker was never a Jedi Master. Highlight of my working day. FML

#20497564
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19929) - you deserved it (5130)

On 02/07/2013 at 9:56pm - work - by djxerxes9000 - Canada

Today, my ex looked at me for the first time in months. I felt like I could fly. Seconds later my flight ended. I fell down the stairs. FML

#7164896
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19926) - you deserved it (11001)

On 01/05/2010 at 3:24pm - love - by katiekat (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, it was my first time meeting my fiancé's parents. My future mother-in-law had cooked steak, hearing it was my favourite food. I somehow managed to bite my tongue, and then blurt out "F*ck!" just after she asked me how it was. FML

#19775442
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19926) - you deserved it (7345)

On 06/12/2012 at 6:34am - misc - by perfectman (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I slipped and sprained my ankle while shopping for a present for my husband, who later came home and tripped over my elevated leg, hurting my ankle again. Now I have an excruciating sprain, and a spouse who's furious at me because "I shouldn't have tried to surprise him." FML

#13502195
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19924) - you deserved it (2360)

On 10/18/2010 at 7:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, there was a power outage at my apartment. I ended up deciding that the power wasn't going to come on any time soon, and that I should go to a hotel for the night. Just after I unpacked at the hotel, my neighbor called to say the power had come back. FML

#20942793
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19924) - you deserved it (39739)

On 11/02/2013 at 5:41pm - misc - by FUCKING POWER - United States (Michigan)



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