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Today, I had to do community service work, so I helped out at a senior center. One of the confused elderly patients, who believed the Cold War was still on, thought I was a Soviet and started screaming about how I was going to nuke his country. FML

#18898180
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22822) - you deserved it (3702)

On 01/24/2012 at 11:42am - work - by communistgirl (woman) - United States

Today, some beefed-up guy wearing a wife-beater sat in my restaurant, took out a big sack of coins, and played My Little Pony songs on the jukebox for 4 hours straight. I couldn't summon the courage to tell him to leave. FML

#20401192
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22818) - you deserved it (5257)

On 12/15/2012 at 7:57pm - work - by lingling (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went to choir rehearsal at 7:30 in the morning. When the guy I have a major crush on stood next to me, I got really excited, so I tried to sound good. After the song ended, he asked me if I wanted some gum to cover up my morning breath. FML

#19111360
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22815) - you deserved it (10266)

On 02/18/2012 at 11:03pm - love - by snowinggrey - United States

Today, I had my girlfriend over to meet my parents. After dinner, we were in the living room talking. My dad thought it would be funny to grab our cat, stick it down his shirt, then pretend to give birth to it, with sound effects. FML

#20070030
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22812) - you deserved it (2108)

On 09/13/2012 at 8:37am - misc - by Sprtsgeek13 - United States (Maine)

Today, I picked up my car from the repair shop, drove two miles, and ran out of gas. I then walked to get gas, put a gallon of gas in the car, and tried to start it. The battery was too weak to start the car, and died on the spot. FML

#19896001
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22806) - you deserved it (2214)

On 07/05/2012 at 4:24pm - misc - by 303 - United States (Texas)

Today, I called out "personal" from work because I had to study for a major test that is taking place tomorrow. An hour later my manager called to fire me for "not taking work seriously", then I got an email that the test is being postponed. FML

#9081511
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22806) - you deserved it (3481)

On 03/14/2010 at 7:13pm - work - by Laurendorcus - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got laid off. Why would they lay me off right before the holidays? Because they want to make sure every one else gets a nice holiday bonus. FML

#20173186
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22802) - you deserved it (1435)

On 11/21/2012 at 11:31pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my first date consisted of him and me in the emergency room of the hospital after his little brother hit me in the face with a baseball bat. FML

#19635383
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22801) - you deserved it (1639)

On 05/17/2012 at 1:05am - misc - by secret_source (woman) - United States

Today, I went to a 'haunted' theme park, actors had been trying to scare me the whole night. I was waiting by an outdoor heater for my friend when a hand came out of nowhere close to my face. I screamed at the top of my lungs, but it was only some chick wanting to warm her hands by the heater. FML

#5987290
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22800) - you deserved it (6563)

On 10/25/2009 at 4:54am - misc - by mack (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I realized that I have completely fallen for this incredible guy, and that I am really looking forward to where our relationship will take us. He just informed me that he will be doing jail time following his court date Tuesday. FML

#7218409
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22798) - you deserved it (5143)

On 01/08/2010 at 3:06pm - love - by brokenrelicslost (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my Dad's banjo arrived, as part of his mid-life crisis. It would be fine if he could play it but unfortunately he's tone deaf. He hasn't stopped playing it for the last 4 hours. FML

#17927244
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22797) - you deserved it (2270)

On 10/07/2011 at 11:09am - misc - by anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my future father in law motorboated my breasts as I bent down to give him a hug goodbye. The rest of the family stood there laughing. This is what I'm marrying into? FML

#6665915
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22796) - you deserved it (2907)

On 12/08/2009 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by umm - United States (Texas)

Today, as I was just finishing my grocery shopping, a little girl and her mother walked past. Seeing the little girl staring at me, I waved. The girl then pointed to me and asked her mother "Mommy, is that man pregnant?" FML

#18659966
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22795) - you deserved it (6660)

On 12/31/2011 at 1:21am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)



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