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Today, I was jamming out and playing some air guitar. I somehow managed to knee myself directly in my left eye socket. I now have a hideously swollen face and a black eye. When people ask me what happened, I'll be hesitant to tell the truth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6593) - you deserved it (13432)
On 03/08/2012 at 4:03am - misc - by wtf - United States
Today, my friend and I were bouncing around on a trampoline. We brought my dog up to bounce him around. We found it hilarious. He didn't. He attacked us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6588) - you deserved it (57392)
On 04/19/2011 at 6:03am - animals - by sore (woman) - Ireland (Limerick)
Today, I met a woman that I've been emailing and trading pics with for over a month. We had a face to face, she was surprisingly overweight, and the sun hit her face in a way that radiated all her facial hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6587) - you deserved it (18497)
On 01/14/2009 at 11:03am - love - by agnosticstudy - United States (Alabama)
Today, I was on Facebook when I saw a link about what Pokémon would look like if they had genitals. I'm not quite sure why, but I decided to click it, and at that exact moment, my brother and his friend walked in. They told my mom I was looking at Pokémon porn. I'll never be able to live this down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6586) - you deserved it (15124)
On 01/03/2010 at 11:40am - intimacy - by grounded (man) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)
Today, I woke up extremely hungover next to a guy I have been in love with for a while but hadn't seen for ages. Turns out he had a bet going with his mates. He bet he could get me to sleep with him straight away even after not calling me for a month. He was right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6583) - you deserved it (15619)
On 11/03/2009 at 4:25am - intimacy - by Lovestupid (woman) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)
Today, I was told by my girlfriend that in the thralls of my drunken haze last night, I tried to French-kiss her mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6581) - you deserved it (24153)
On 01/15/2011 at 3:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I purposely misspelled words while texting my boyfriend so he would think I was out partying and having a life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6580) - you deserved it (20097)
On 08/29/2012 at 9:33pm - misc - by nolife - United States (Virginia)
Today, at my volleyball tournament I was extremely pumped to start playing so I went to take my sweats off and everybody began to stare at me then I looked down to come to realize I had no spandex on, just a thong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6578) - you deserved it (18789)
On 02/27/2010 at 8:11pm - misc - by volleyballgirl - United States
Today, I finally went to the DMV to replace my lost license. After waiting for almost two hours, I casually rummaged through my purse. Something strange inside the lining caught my eye. It was my license. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6578) - you deserved it (14705)
On 07/13/2012 at 11:19am - misc - by HellisLikeTheDMV (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I really wanted something to drink. I looked in the fridge, and found some of my grandma's soy milk. I decide to take a swig, and instead of tasting soy, I tasted rotten chicken. Turns out my grandma knew I drink her soy milk and decided to swap it with expired chicken broth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6577) - you deserved it (26103)
On 12/10/2009 at 12:41am - work - by souped (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I allowed my friend to practice driving in my car. As she began to let the car roll forward, she looked at me and very seriously asked, "Brakes is the right pedal, right?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (6576) - you deserved it (17509)
On 10/13/2010 at 11:08pm - misc - by holly10350 (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I tested the new taps in the shower, with my head. Yep, they're strong enough. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6576) - you deserved it (18577)
On 05/28/2010 at 9:18am - misc - by gahdamnit - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I reached behind my couch to plug my phone charger in. My arm got stuck and I had to wait for my roommate to get home to help me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6573) - you deserved it (9087)
On 06/06/2012 at 8:50pm - misc - by jenny2989 - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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