Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while on my Dad's computer, I looked through the browser history to find the name of a website I'd visited on it the other day. I soon found out he watches a staggering amount of downright frightening incest porn. I'm disturbed on so many levels. FML

#21445392
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24725) - you deserved it (3080)

On 07/22/2015 at 7:52am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom came home drunk and yelled at me for 20 minutes for not feeding the cat. We don't have a cat. FML

#20164653
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24715) - you deserved it (1631)

On 11/15/2012 at 7:36pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, a guy came by my house and demanded my fiancé come out and fight. He explained that my fiancé had been stupid enough to not only troll on a local interest forum, but to leave his name and our address, inviting people to "come shut me up if you think you're tough enough." FML

#19260782
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24714) - you deserved it (3048)

On 03/11/2012 at 10:49pm - misc - by me (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, the air bag system in my car somehow malfunctioned, and the air bag inflated while I was driving, causing me to lose control and crash into a street light. I ended up with a badly bruised face because the air bag had already deflated by then. FML

#20018268
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24714) - you deserved it (1478)

On 08/13/2012 at 4:06am - health - by stupid_airbag (man) - Australia

Today, I decided to go meet up with a guy that I met online for the first time. All he could talk about was how he expects me to "clean, cook, and submit" my body for sex at least twice a day when we get married. FML

#20173484
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24714) - you deserved it (5800)

On 11/22/2012 at 4:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I received a terrible grade for an essay I worked really hard on. I had two friends, one being an English major, check it over. However, apparently I "clearly didn't use spellcheck" on this essay just like the last one I submitted to her. FML

#21394988
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24714) - you deserved it (5305)

On 04/16/2015 at 11:34pm - work - by shaifox96 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I finally found a bug I had been trying to get rid of. When I removed my bra, I noticed what looked like a piece of bug on it. Apparently, the bug was flattened and suffocated by my boob the entire day. FML

#21414219
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24714) - you deserved it (2359)

On 05/22/2015 at 10:26pm - misc - by Kurda (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I came home to find a BMW partially blocking my driveway. I was already having a bad day, and was upset that some stuck up fool blocked my driveway, so I keyed the driver's side. 5 minutes later my parents show up. The BMW was a graduation gift for me. FML

#3553930
401 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24713) - you deserved it (229516)

On 07/07/2009 at 1:25pm - misc - by Stoopid (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I tripped while walking down a large flight of stairs. As I fell forward, I instinctively reached out and grabbed onto one of the guys walking up. I ended up taking him and two other people down with me, earning myself a great many disgusted glares as I dusted myself off. FML

#20489268
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24713) - you deserved it (7504)

On 02/01/2013 at 5:53pm - health - by Awkward (man) - United Kingdom (Wolverhampton)

Today, my colleagues were excitedly talking about going for drinks after work. I heard one of them ask, Is Sam coming?' and shortly after leave without me. I'm Sam. FML

#21385304
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24712) - you deserved it (3303)

On 04/01/2015 at 7:37am - work - by Sam - Netherlands (Groningen)

Today, I realized the closest thing I've had to an intimate relationship with a female is the one I have with my cat. Even then, she ignores me. FML

#18943699
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24712) - you deserved it (5407)

On 01/29/2012 at 2:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I went to work with a great attitude, something that doesn't happen often. It was shortly ruined after some lady yelled at me because I accidentally shorted her one penny. Yep. One single penny. FML

#21344188
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24711) - you deserved it (3572)

On 01/25/2015 at 8:41pm - work - by WhyMe (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was teasing my cat with a piece of string when suddenly my phone rang. I answered it with one hand and put the string down with the other onto my lap. The beast seized the opportunity to spring, claws out, onto my privates. FML

#305
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24710) - you deserved it (13500)

On 11/14/2008 at 10:27pm - animals - by dooommage - Sent from mobile version



FML's blog

  • Feeling shitty? Write to Auntie Bernie!
  • It's a new summer, so here's a new feature. OK, that doesn't mean much, but you've got to start somewhere. The idea came from the fact that we get sent a lot of FMLs that touch us, in our heart of…

Friday 24 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: