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Today, I was late to a sold out movie in the theater, so I had to shuffle in during the previews in the dark. I sat down in what I thought was the last vacant seat, but I'd really just sat in a small woman's lap. She was not happy. FML

#13036561
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20197) - you deserved it (11392)

On 09/13/2010 at 4:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I witnessed my husband swat a coffee bean over and over again, all the while mistaking it for a fly. I then figured he probably has a lower IQ than I do, which wouldn't be so bad if mine wasn't a few points away from minor retardation. FML

#19340403
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20196) - you deserved it (5499)

On 03/24/2012 at 7:06pm - misc - by sheilob (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I jokingly asked my boyfriend to marry me, because it's a leap year. He is now avoiding me for fear that I was serious. FML

#19188857
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20197) - you deserved it (14743)

On 02/29/2012 at 1:10pm - love - by CptZoe - United Kingdom (Rotherham)

Today, I had to give my husband a tutorial on how to use jumper cables. Confused and flustered, he requested written instructions. FML

#18975500
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20195) - you deserved it (3135)

On 02/02/2012 at 9:50am - misc - by MM (woman) -

Today, a little girl walked up to me at Target and asked me what my name was. I smiled and told her my name was Kristen. She looked at the skirt I was wearing and said, "Kristen, can you wear pants tomorrow?" FML

#19737543
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20195) - you deserved it (5913)

On 06/05/2012 at 7:56am - work - by whattdafuuukkkk (woman) - United States

Today, I started my new job at a fragrance store. While training, the manager had me smell all of the scents to become familiar with the products. Before my shift was over, I'd had three asthma attacks. FML

#20044273
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20194) - you deserved it (4964)

On 08/27/2012 at 9:33am - work - by Joe - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I found out that my most amazing spring break ever, will be spent stuck on a ship with my ex. It's been almost two years, and he still isn't over me. Yay. This cruise shall be fun. FML

#8542819
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20194) - you deserved it (5436)

On 02/22/2010 at 1:31am - love - by nomoresbfun (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML

#20067647
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20190) - you deserved it (3874)

On 09/11/2012 at 3:16pm - love - by Anonymous - Sweden

Today, I passed a field where some kids were playing football. The ball rolled over in my direction, so they asked me to kick it over. I tried and failed three times, and ended up throwing it over, where it embarrassingly landed about 2 feet away. They had to come over and get it. FML

#19326437
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20189) - you deserved it (9488)

On 03/22/2012 at 1:21pm - misc - by Hannah (woman) - Ireland (Wexford)

Today, I missed my dentist appointment. I couldn't attend, because I was too busy puking my guts up due to a bad reaction to the pain medication I'm taking for my toothache. FML

#19357685
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20188) - you deserved it (1891)

On 03/27/2012 at 3:08pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I confessed to my co-worker that I've secretly loved him for months. He laughed hysterically for about a minute straight before shaking his head and excusing himself from the store. Even the fact that my boss fired him for leaving early isn't cheering me up. FML

#19965538
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20187) - you deserved it (3280)

On 07/20/2012 at 9:59pm - love - by Alanis (woman) - United States

Today, I got a flat tire on the highway. If that wasn't bad enough I had no spare in the car. By the time I got a ride to get a new tire, someone was nice enough to fix my air conditioning for me. They smashed out my window to break in. The doors were not locked. FML

Today, it was my wedding day. Midway through the ceremony, my visibly drunk uncle stood up and denounced the minister for "preaching yer god shite where it weren't never be welcome". FML

#19276871
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20180) - you deserved it (2171)

On 03/14/2012 at 10:38am - love - by mel_bear_ (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)



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