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Today, I saw a father and son playing football in a car park when I was on my way to work. The ball rolled towards me so feeling nice I kicked it back to them. Turns out it went straight through their car window. FML

#18044190
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23080) - you deserved it (6030)

On 10/22/2011 at 4:34am - misc - by tom0441 - Reserved

Today, I found out the reason my boyfriend asked me out was because the fortune ball app on his iPod told him to. FML

#8364969
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23077) - you deserved it (3050)

On 02/17/2010 at 1:38am - love - by amireallyloved - United States (California)

Today, I had to have a long and awkward meeting with my boss. It wouldn't have been too awkward though, if I didn't have to avoid staring at her exposed breast whilst she fed her 8 week old baby. FML

Today, through sheer luck, I got talking to an actor from the Harry Potter films who I've had a crush on since I was about ten. I tried to play it cool, and pretend I didn't know who he was. Then my phone rang, with the Harry Potter theme tune. FML

#20633236
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23076) - you deserved it (41811)

On 04/30/2013 at 6:23pm - misc - by itsellie27 (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my house got broken into for the third time. The nice police officer said that if I didn't want my house to keep being robbed I should "Fix the place up so it doesn't look like a crummy vacant building." FML

#15031237
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23075) - you deserved it (7831)

On 02/18/2011 at 8:06pm - misc - by rachel - United States (California)

Today, my boss used Siri to settle a debate we were having in our team meeting. Siri responded by calling him "Daddy". FML

#21363220
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23082) - you deserved it (1974)

On 02/25/2015 at 9:18am - work - by mags89 - United States

Today, I had to tell my wife that the new "vegan" diet she has put us on is not working with my body. It's not the horrible gas, hot shits, or constant hunger that made me realize this. It was the dream I had about fried chicken that did. FML

#19134075
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23075) - you deserved it (2819)

On 02/21/2012 at 8:29pm - misc - by kohler9790 - United States

Today, I was asked by my mom if I could have a joint-birthday party with her dog because it would be the dog's "big 1-0." She was completely serious. FML

#6822450
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23070) - you deserved it (2242)

On 12/19/2009 at 1:20am - animals - by dog_day (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, it's "family fun night." We're pulling weeds. FML

#18894486
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23070) - you deserved it (2334)

On 01/23/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by Suzie Leone (woman) - United States

Today, I started my first day of work. I was told to absorb everything going on and to get used to the high-paced flow of things. I've been sitting at my desk for two hours now, and the office has been empty since I've walked in. FML

#13276180
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23069) - you deserved it (2647)

On 10/01/2010 at 12:55pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I found out the real reason why my brother wasn't at his fiancé's Halloween party. He's been in jail for the past 3 months. When was anyone going to tell me? FML

#13800215
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23067) - you deserved it (2696)

On 11/11/2010 at 9:27am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my report card finally came in. My mom took one look at it and told me that if I'm not going to take my grades seriously, I might as well start looking for a sugar daddy. But first, I apparently need to work on prettying myself up. FML

#17644217
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23066) - you deserved it (8033)

On 09/02/2011 at 12:58pm - misc - by tryingtobepretty101 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my eight-year-old son thought that if he swallowed soap, his farts would smell like soap. The smell of vomit and diarrhea now permeating my house is proof of how wrong he was. FML

#19680165
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23066) - you deserved it (2269)

On 05/25/2012 at 8:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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