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Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML

#2485
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20346) - you deserved it (1840)

On 01/24/2009 at 9:47pm - love - by ohfantastic - United States (California)

Today, my roommate decided to turn off all appliances in the house to "save" electricity. This included the refrigerator. FML

#20088101
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20341) - you deserved it (1287)

On 09/25/2012 at 1:13pm - misc - by Jograd - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had to explain to my one person on my staff why having kids aged 6 to 9 hammering in screws with the butt end of a screwdriver is neither safe, nor a good idea. FML

#15170872
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20340) - you deserved it (2596)

On 03/02/2011 at 12:22am - work - by AntiBobTheBuilder (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was woken up by a call from "the Nuisance Call Prevention Registry". The lady on the telephone didn't see the irony. FML

#19405538
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20340) - you deserved it (1860)

On 04/04/2012 at 6:58am - misc - by Telemarket (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, after repairing the toilet, the light, the shower, the cooker and the heater in the flat I've just moved into, my boiler dies. It's mid December, about 1 degree outside. FML

#526
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20338) - you deserved it (1633)

On 12/16/2008 at 2:55am - misc - by Melie-Melo - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I went to have dinner with my girlfriend and her family. It got silent, so, noticing her legs were darker than they were a few hours ago, I wanted to ask her if she used tanning lotion. I ended up asking her if her legs were fake. Her dad has prosthetic legs. FML

#20002131
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20334) - you deserved it (6264)

On 08/04/2012 at 12:06pm - misc - by ooops (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, it's been one week since my demented grandma babysat my five-year-old daughter while my husband took me to a fancy restaurant. Now she's taken to screaming and calling me a "damn commie" whenever I discipline or say no to her. FML

#19102650
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20330) - you deserved it (5143)

On 02/17/2012 at 7:58pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend yawned while I was giving him head. FML

#12959324
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20330) - you deserved it (29941)

On 09/08/2010 at 2:53am - intimacy - by dom - United States

Today, while on the bus, I took out my breath spray. The elderly lady beside me thought it was pepper spray. She panicked and started screaming, which culminated in the man near her punching me in the jaw. FML

#20037445
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20326) - you deserved it (1531)

On 08/23/2012 at 12:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was brushing my teeth when I looked up. There was a huge scorpion dangling on the air vent above my head. I was trapped in the bathroom for over an hour trying to build the courage to run out. FML

#19908614
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20327) - you deserved it (5815)

On 07/08/2012 at 5:47am - animals - by scorpionsurviver - United States

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

#20188881
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20325) - you deserved it (7841)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:06am - health - by WTFFAIL (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I attended a formal banquet. The host was delivering a speech, when I felt the urge to pee, so I tried to quietly excuse myself. My chair screeched over the floor as I got up, I tripped over my own feet, and I accidentally took the door leading outdoors, where I ended up peeing in shame. FML

#19613905
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20323) - you deserved it (3594)

On 05/12/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by Andy (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, on my first day of a new factory job, I discovered that my new boss had lied to me about my hours. I found this out when my coworkers burst out laughing when I mentioned having the weekends off, and talking about my recreational plans. FML

#19508407
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20322) - you deserved it (2017)

On 04/21/2012 at 10:22pm - work - by Anonymous - United States



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