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Today, while painting a wall, I handed a bucket of paint up to my friend who was standing on the top rung of a ladder. She said she felt dizzy, and came crashing down on me, along with the paint on my head. FML

#19306494
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16230) - you deserved it (1943)

On 03/19/2012 at 8:39am - misc - by fuuu. - Hong Kong

Today, I was at the beach with my buddy. Messing around, he swam up behind me and dunked me under the water. Naturally, moments later I swam behind him, grabbed both his ankles and stood up, flipping him completely, only to see him watching me from a few feet away. I flipped a 70 year old man. FML

#150078
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16225) - you deserved it (45896)

On 02/27/2009 at 1:03am - misc - by beachbum (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I saw an old man who needed help crossing the street. I went over to him and helped him across the street. When he thanked me, I said, "No problem, sir." They responded by hitting me in the happy sacks and screaming that they were a woman. FML

#6467365
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16224) - you deserved it (4961)

On 11/26/2009 at 7:26pm - misc - by anniecook (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had to sit here for 8 hours copying and pasting thousands of product codes on a frigging spreadsheet. My job title is not data entry, I'm a graphic designer. FML

#1791
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16224) - you deserved it (2131)

On 01/19/2009 at 8:23pm - work - by Lincoln - Australia (Queensland)

Today, after volleyball practice, I noticed my pants were missing. Now I have to go to work wearing spandex bottoms, all because one of my teammates is a thieving douche. FML

#20033828
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16223) - you deserved it (1470)

On 08/21/2012 at 12:39pm - work - by Rimmy Jobs (woman) - United States

Today, my dad forced the whole family to sit through a two-hour lecture, with supporting research, on how the "Mayan prophecy" is actually a load of shit fabricated by conmen. Nice to know he thinks we're all borderline brain-dead, gullible fuckwits who believed it to begin with. Thanks, dad. FML

#20400784
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16222) - you deserved it (3741)

On 12/15/2012 at 1:43pm - misc - by oh gee, you don't say (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, I gave my husband an expensive watch. The first words out of his mouth were, "You didn't use our joint bank account for this, right?" He then asked if I still had the receipt. FML

#19309374
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16220) - you deserved it (3585)

On 03/19/2012 at 7:50pm - money - by moneycatious (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my anxiety was so bad that when I was riding my bike on the side walk and two pedestrians came walking in the opposite direction, I got so nervous about having to go between them or accidentally hitting them that I fell off my bike, into a bush. FML

#19434404
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16216) - you deserved it (4577)

On 04/09/2012 at 1:31am - misc - by sydstreet - United States (Texas)

Today, I was riding the subway when a beautiful topless girl walked into my car and sat directly in front of me. Then, the train stopped abruptly and I banged my head. The girl was gone and I realized it had all been a dream. Then I realized I was supposed to get off 17 stops ago. FML

#12544003
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16218) - you deserved it (34435)

On 08/15/2010 at 6:31pm - intimacy - by Peekaman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I reached a new level of commitment in my relationship with my boyfriend. This happened when he pooped on the side of the road beside my truck, while talking and making eye contact with me while wiping. FML

#19661428
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16215) - you deserved it (1945)

On 05/22/2012 at 8:21am - love - by ordinaryday - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I decided to jack it a few times because I haven't been laid in a while. After round 3 my ex called me up and said she wanted to 'talk.' When she came over she made it abundantly clear that she wanted to make whoopie. Couldn't get it up. FML

#1585
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16214) - you deserved it (32458)

On 01/18/2009 at 11:30am - intimacy - by f__k_it - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out why it might be awkward to have your plumber and your least well-behaved dog share a name. Bad plumber. FML

#20100991
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16214) - you deserved it (2116)

On 10/04/2012 at 2:20am - animals - by acme - Israel

Today, after giving my mother and my girlfriend their Christmas presents, I realized just how similar they looked both in box size and wrapping paper. I noticed after my mother gasped upon finding a vibrator in her box. FML

#20420433
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16213) - you deserved it (46922)

On 12/25/2012 at 2:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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