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Today, while I was at work at a nursing home I was attempting to dress a woman for bed. She popped me a left hook and I had to ask the nurse to look at my jaw. After my nurse said I was okay she asked me to continue getting the woman dressed for bed. She hit me 5 more times. FML

#18094107
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23542) - you deserved it (2280)

On 10/28/2011 at 1:37am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my thirteen-year-old daughter tried to scratch the freckles off of her face. We ended up going to the hospital. FML

#20067114
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23541) - you deserved it (2351)

On 09/11/2012 at 12:47am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was designated driver for my friends. This entailed: standing around in the cold for 3 hours, not drinking, dealing with drunk people, and oh yeah, I almost forgot, cleaning up vomit from my hair, my clothes, and my brand new car. FML

#8866144
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23540) - you deserved it (6995)

On 03/06/2010 at 10:22am - misc - by Coldflame (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was watching TV with my boyfriend, when a World of Warcraft commercial came on. He turned to me and said, "Yeah, I'd choose the Horde over you any day." FML

#18798244
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23540) - you deserved it (3911)

On 01/13/2012 at 6:56pm - love - by Sad.To.Be.Me. (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I finally got up the courage to tell my boyfriend of a year and a half that I love him. His response was to start to snore, pretending to be asleep. FML

#19028650
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23540) - you deserved it (3367)

On 02/08/2012 at 7:07pm - love - by c -

Today, I came home after a two week vacation to find that my wonderful dog had pooped and peed all over my room. My mother was kind enough to dog-sit; however, instead of helping me by cleaning up the horrid mess, she just left me coupons for Glade plug-in air fresheners. FML

#6287406
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23539) - you deserved it (3439)

On 11/13/2009 at 1:34pm - animals - by PuppyLove2009 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while at work I went to use the public restroom because I had a severe case of diarrhea. All went well until the timed sensor lights went off and I couldn't leave my stall to get them back on. I sat there for thirty minutes in pure darkness. FML

#7105226
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23540) - you deserved it (3507)

On 01/02/2010 at 2:24pm - work - by Bathroom Problems - France

Today, I was going to meet my friend at a concert. I got there before her, so I went in to check out the local bands that were playing before the headliner. When she got there, I went just outside the building to give her a ticket. The security guards wouldn't let me back in. She went in anyway. FML

#12850151
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23536) - you deserved it (6179)

On 09/01/2010 at 3:05am - misc - by deserted - Sent from mobile version

Today, my husband decided that the best way to deal with me eating the last chocolate chip muffin was to give me the silent treatment. Normally, I'd just get over his childish behavior, but we're on a fifteen hour car trip back home with our one year old. FML

#17148653
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23536) - you deserved it (5159)

On 07/17/2011 at 12:00pm - misc - by twelfinity - United States (California)

Today, I was at the gym, when a pretty overweight guy started staring and eventually taunting me. Let me tell you, lines such as "Lay off the cake, fatty!" and "I can see your gut hanging out your ass, for fuck's sake!" don't exactly boost one's self-confidence. FML

#20026361
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23534) - you deserved it (2402)

On 08/17/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by fuckoffandfuckoffagainyoucunt (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I let my boyfriend finger me for the first time. Today, I also learned, after fifteen very, very long minutes of it, how to fake an orgasm. FML

#6731473
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23533) - you deserved it (5260)

On 12/13/2009 at 12:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mother and I were driving through Del Taco. Instead of ordering "Macho Diet Coke", she said "Macho Diet Cock". After correcting herself and pulling up to the window, the employee who goes to my high school gave her the drink and his phone number. FML

#7898835
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23533) - you deserved it (2329)

On 02/05/2010 at 2:52am - misc - by MachoFluster (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boss called me into his office and bitched me out for a good half hour for my attitude to our customers. Apparently I always look pissed off and sound sarcastic. That's just my face at rest. FML

#17530831
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23531) - you deserved it (4952)

On 08/20/2011 at 5:36pm - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Solihull)



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