Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, I discovered that my mother uses my eyebrow tweezers to pull ticks off the dog. She also hasn't figured out that just dipping the tweezers in alcohol doesn't automatically sterilize them. Especially if there is icky dog hair still stuck on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15394) - you deserved it (2266)
On 03/09/2010 at 10:12pm - health - by whoanoa (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, a colony of ants announced that they'd moved into my bedroom closet as I went to get dressed for work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15387) - you deserved it (1792)
On 08/28/2011 at 2:18pm - misc - by ant_hater (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I went to my favorite bar after work for a drink. On my way to the porch out back, I didn't realize the sliding glass door was shut, and walked straight into it. I was stone cold sober, but the bartender refused to believe me, and cut me off before my first beer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15386) - you deserved it (3414)
On 09/04/2012 at 12:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I discovered a large and somewhat disturbing whitehead inside my ear crevice. Apparently it's been there for a while, because everyone at work has nicknamed it Hugo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15384) - you deserved it (2138)
On 09/08/2012 at 6:39pm - work - by me - United States
Today, I had to give a speech but I wasn't prepared. I decided to give it anyway. While giving the speech, I got so nervous I passed out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15380) - you deserved it (6095)
On 03/02/2010 at 9:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I was cutting the grass on my riding mower. I spent a good 3 hours working on it. When I finished, I got off and went to take a look. It looked the same as when I started. I then realized that I hadn't lowered the mower part. I spent 3 hours just driving around. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15377) - you deserved it (58124)
On 07/19/2010 at 4:48pm - misc - by Dumbfounded - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my co-worker and I played a game where we give each other the bird in whatever creative manner we could come up with. Deciding to be sneaky, I hid behind a wall with my middle finger up as I heard him walking into the office. It was my boss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15375) - you deserved it (34745)
On 05/01/2013 at 5:48pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was woken up by my elderly neighbor banging on my door at 2am. She needed "urgent" assistance as she had forgotten how to turn her TV off. I'd just fallen asleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15373) - you deserved it (1179)
On 11/30/2012 at 2:29am - misc - by Rachael (woman) - Australia
Today, I had to buy a wrist brace for a repetitive strain injury. I got the injury because I was knitting too much. I'm 22. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15373) - you deserved it (21571)
On 06/21/2010 at 9:28pm - health - by GrannyAt22 (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, I learned that it takes about half an hour to get melted cheese out of your hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15372) - you deserved it (4802)
On 10/10/2011 at 11:34pm - health - by jzappe - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and heavy. She had her shirt off, and commented on the small size of her breasts. Trying to make her feel better, I said I dated smaller breasts. She replied by saying she'd dated bigger penises. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15372) - you deserved it (50528)
On 12/20/2011 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Ryan - United States (Arizona)
Today, I realized just how bad my problem with making eye contact is, when I caught myself looking the other way when the singer in a music video looked directly at the camera. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15372) - you deserved it (3116)
On 04/24/2012 at 2:49pm - misc - by suhleedah18 - United States
Today, my friend mentioned a book that reminded her of me, when I asked what it was called she said "He's just not that into you". FML
I agree, your life sucks (15368) - you deserved it (1592)
On 01/27/2009 at 7:17pm - love - by Oh really - Australia (Western Australia)
Saturday 1 March 2014
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments - FeedBurner alternative
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
