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Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I reached climax. While I was screaming, my 4 year old son comes in with his water gun because he thought I was in trouble. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13395) - you deserved it (49776)
On 02/06/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was getting ready to load my groceries in my car when my remote wouldn't work and neither would my key to unlock it. A cute young guy came over, not to help but to ask me what the hell I was doing to his car. My car, that looked exactly like his, was on the other side of the lot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13391) - you deserved it (8873)
On 10/06/2010 at 10:29am - misc - by ctschantz - Sent from mobile version
Today, I realized my paranoia is really bad when I saw my coworker holding a knife and immediately began thinking of ways to keep him from stabbing me. I work in a restaurant kitchen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13384) - you deserved it (2486)
On 06/06/2012 at 1:00am - work - by Jonas - United States (Texas)
Today, my girlfriend told me what turns her on: cheese. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13385) - you deserved it (1569)
Today, I had a really cute waitress at lunch. I decided to leave my number and a $50 bill for a $15 check. When I left the restaurant I realized I still had the $50 but a $1 bill was missing from my wallet. I've been getting threatening text messages all day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13381) - you deserved it (54074)
On 04/06/2009 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, I got to my underground parking garage at work and saw my boss pulling into a spot. I thought I would show him my reverse parking skills and decided to park beside him. As I was pulling in he opened his door to get out and I smashed into it, nearly running him over. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13381) - you deserved it (61070)
On 03/20/2009 at 1:11pm - work - by mikej1985 (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was hanging out with a co-worker who I really liked. One thing led to another and we ended up going to her house and hooked up. Once we'd finished, I noticed another co-workers ID on the floor by her bed. I asked her about it and she said he must have dropped it there last night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13376) - you deserved it (5809)
On 09/02/2009 at 4:41am - intimacy - by Mdrk783 (man) - United States
Today, the bus came to pick up my daughter to take her to kindergarten. When it honked, I opened the door for her to let her run out to it. Halfway there she tripped and started crying. I couldn't run out because I was still in my underwear. Now her bus thinks I'm the worst mom ever. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13376) - you deserved it (4938)
On 03/14/2011 at 10:25pm - kids - by mommylovesu (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was in a public washroom and I had to take a dump. I knew how dirty the toilets were, so tried to do the "stand and poo." Unfortunately, I slipped and the poo fell on the ground. Then I realized there were no paper towels. There was a line outside waiting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13370) - you deserved it (25121)
On 11/11/2010 at 8:30am - health - by sweet_stufz - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I went caroling with some family friends. We got pelted with oranges. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13369) - you deserved it (17984)
On 12/23/2011 at 12:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I took one of those IQ tests on the internet. I cheated and still got a 70. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13367) - you deserved it (67950)
On 04/13/2009 at 2:42pm - misc - by snathans (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was walking back to my hotel from the town square, and got lost. I turned back and walked around town for an hour, freaking out and panicking. When I finally found the hotel, I realized it was practically a stone's throw from where I was when I turned around. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13368) - you deserved it (5680)
On 03/20/2012 at 12:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Orebro Lan)
Today, I was at Target with my mom. After 10 minutes of my mom walking around looking confused, I said, "Mom, what are you looking for? I worked at this place for 4 years, I know where everything is." My mom was looking for KY. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13364) - you deserved it (1647)
On 01/15/2009 at 6:08pm - misc - by kallens - United States (Minnesota)
Friday 6 December 2013
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