Morning!
By whydoihavecats - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
You seem to be glued to FML. Shall we set a tent up for you to sleep in?
You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we understand why.
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
By whydoihavecats - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom
By Anonymous - 04/08/2015 21:42 - United States - Utica
By MushyKetchup - 14/08/2015 07:01 - United States - Amarillo
By MoxleyCrue - 17/08/2015 07:34 - United States - Pittsburgh
By ShroomSalad - 17/08/2015 22:11 - United States - Miami
Thank you guys all for the nice comments! And yes I did finally get through to them, they decided to answer just as my son closed his eyes! FML!
By julian1 - 19/08/2015 11:34 - United States - Orlando
By SebastianCT - 19/08/2015 17:44 - United States - Tampa
By Anonymous - 21/08/2015 08:33 - United States - San Francisco
By Annie - 24/08/2015 08:46 - United Kingdom - London
By SilentSin - 25/08/2015 02:02 - United States - Canton
OP here. I just wanna clear things up. I work third shift and go to college full time, so yes, I do take naps every now and then before work (usually right after classes), and the two dogs I own are a Pomeranian and a chihuahua terroir, both of which are two very small breeds of dogs. So for those saying that dogs are meant for protection, yeah, not these. Pomeranians are very defensive of their territory, so no matter who or what my Pom sees or hears outside, she'll bark like crazy. The chihuahua usually does the same thing; they bark even when they hear me open the garage door. No, I never heard the intruder break in and yes, I have trained the dogs both to silence the barking but only on command. So since they were in a different room than me, I went and commanded them to silence, and yes I didn't think there was a burglar in the house because like I said earlier, these dogs bark at EVERYTHING. Being distracted by the dogs, I did get KO'd but it wasn't for too long. I woke up only minutes after, called police and managed to catch the thief, so it's all good now. I hope this clears things up and that y'all have a fantastic day!
By Mush - 27/08/2015 16:42 - France - Montpellier
By mumfordandsonimdisappointed - 29/08/2015 05:09 - United States
By really? - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States
By NightHawk4926 - 09/09/2015 22:15 - United States - Las Vegas
By bwoolf96 - 10/09/2015 12:32
By RHChiliPeppers - 12/09/2015 00:05 - United States - Westminster
Hey there! OP here. I am completely alive and well although I have developed a hatred for hornets. On the plus side, I did get a pretty badass nickname! - Hornet Bait (RHChiliPeppers)
By busmonster - 12/09/2015 00:32 - United States - Alexandria
By RightInTheFace - 12/09/2015 16:16 - United Kingdom - Cardiff
By RENThead - 13/09/2015 19:02 - United States - San Francisco
By kunjac0945 - 14/09/2015 05:21 - United States - New York
OP here. For clarity's sake, this actually happened to me several years ago, on the first day of my summer break. I had to spend the rest of break, as well as my birthday in a cast.
OP here. I was eating in its general proximity. That's what I was doing. Eating things it wanted.