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The Top · The all-time greatest FMLs

stitchesgirl12 tells us more.

stitchesgirl12 10

OP here! No, my stitches weren't anywhere near my butt, I have a bunch on my arm. And, well.. the doctor sewed me up really tight, and I legitimately ripped them while pushing. Lmao. Not my finest moment, but definitely FML worthy. The doctors in the Niagara Region were half asleep over the Easter weekend, my sewed up wound actually looks like a ******.

PeppermintPenny tells us more.

PeppermintPenny 30

OP here, hi. I REALLY can’t believe this got posted. Out of all the times I tried, this FML had to be my first that got published. I would’ve preferred some others, but that’s what you get for trying I guess. I bet you’re all wondering about my age, I’m 19. Being completely curious about the background of most FMLs, I promised myself I’d do a follow-up no matter what, so here it is. It seems my post has divided the community. I trim! Thanks to everyone jumping to my defense saying that unshaven/untrimed hair isn’t strong enough to pierce through clothing. It has grown a little longer in the last couple of weeks since I’m currently at home for the semester break and left my trimmer in my apartment at the university (I have a seperate razor for my armpits). But its still in a normal range even if I say so myself. To the event itself: I haven’t been feeling well the last few days and had been wearing the sweatpants, that are a little on the flimsy side, for a little over 24 hours. I was with my family but they didn’t pay attention to me. In our house everywhere is cat hair, so its not a notable thing to pick a few of the cats hairs of your clothing. Imagine my surprise when I tried removing that particular hair and I felt a tuck. It didn’t hurt, like some might think, cause I don’t rip cat hair from my clothing. I got up, washed my hands and moved my sweatpants around so it was tucked back in. Not a permanent solution, I know, but I do plan on taking care of it this week. I hope you all understand that I mean I will trim this week. To all those people saying „EWWW, OP YOU HAVE TO SHAVE“: I’m not here to please you and I can do whatever I want with my body as long as it doesn’t affect others and believe me, this sure as hell doesn’t affect you, so please hold back your unwanted advice. On the hygienic viewpoint: I have never read this much about vaginal care at once, and that on FML. While you can do whatever you feel right about, don’t lecture me on what you THINK is best. I like lifestyle advice best with facts that have been scientifically proven. Ratings in the **** industry don’t count. The pro bush front almost has me convinced to let it sprout, because it appears to have a lot of (hygienic) advantages, but I think I strike the happy medium and keep with neat trimming. I would ask my boyfriend on his preference, but I’m single (always have been and fear that I always will be, but I think that‘s another FML altogether). I hope I answered most of your questions. I’m purposly not answering all of them, but if you ask nicely and respectfully maybe I will. Thanks again to those who defended me and didn’t assume I was a unhygienic, disgusting bitch, just because I let my pubic hair grow a little. You’re the best and I really feel accepted here and much better about the FML. Without you, there probably wouldn’t be a follow-up. Also some comments really made me laugh out loud, keep up the good work!

clutzirella tells us more.

clutzirella 17

the snake is not dead or bitten. I knew what I was doing and the rat is dead and eaten. they were all buddy for a matter of 20 minutes.

sianydiddle tells us more.

sianydiddle 20

OP here! Can't believe this got posted! Let me shed some light on this. This was a few years ago now, I was with this complete turd for a year, and it's safe to say he's an ex. He used me, and made me think I was going crazy when he used to stay out for whole weekends without so much as a text, and came back with hickeys. He used to tell me it was all in my head and I stupidly believed him. With my 'friend', she was also his brothers girlfriend. His brother was with me when we caught them. She ran out of the house and never gave us an explanation, or an apology. She just ignored us, and to be honest, that suited me fine. With him saying he wanted to be better for me, I had no frame of reference, so that was just a load of bullshit. Silver lining in it all, I'm now with an amazing guy who treats me perfectly. My ex is still single from that day, no woman has been stupid enough to fall for him, which he deserves cause he broke my damn heart. Me and his bro are still friends. To all saying I should've joined them? No thanks, they seemed pretty contented with each other, which is great for them :)

Hollzbananza tells us more.

Hollzbananza 15

To answer some of the questions... Firstly, it's not like I cry every day.. we have been together for almost 4 years so he's seen me cry quite a bit over time. It's easy to notice when he's sitting in front of me or hugging me to console me. And if we're all being honest, sometimes it's just obvious that someone has a boner. My initial reaction was to be shocked and angrily ask if he likes to see me in pain but it's kind of hilarious when I'm not actually upset and crying. I agree that I don't think it's because he's trying to take advantage of me. Boners can have a mind of their own, and it could be an intimacy thing I guess since he's caring and always comforts me when I cry. Who knows... Thanks for the laughs, I enjoyed reading the comments :)