Today, my girlfriend caught the bouquet at her sister's wedding. I took it as a sign so after we got home, I proposed. She laughed and said no way. I'm done. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to a very nice restaurant. I thought it would be a good place to pop the question. I gave the ring to the waiter and asked him to put it on her dessert plate. When she saw it, she picked it up, put it down, and said "No". Then she started to eat her dessert. FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She got incredibly excited and started flapping her hands around. Then she suddenly went deadpan and said, "But seriously… No." FML
Today, after I'd spent ages planning a surprise proposal at the beach, right as I got down on one knee, a seagull swooped in, stole the sandwich from my backpack, and everyone on the beach turned to watch the bird instead of us. My partner had to ask, "Were you about to propose?" FML
Today, after I'd spent two weeks planning the perfect proposal at the aquarium, right as I got down on one knee, a little kid pointed at me and yelled, "Mom! That man dropped something!" Half the people around us started looking around for whatever I'd "lost" instead of watching the proposal. FML
Today, my boyfriend of three years proposed to me. He brought me to our favorite restaurant and ordered expensive champagne. It was all very romantic, until he got on one knee and I farted out of surprise. Loudly. FML
Today, I turned down my boyfriend's proposal because I'm pregnant and I told him I didn't want people thinking that's why we were getting married. He… did not react well. Yes, he knows that I'm pregnant. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed! I wanted to get a jump on things so I started looking at photographers, and he mentioned he already knew a good one. I went to check out the photographer’s Instagram and found a picture of my boyfriend… and his wife. FML
Today, my very cheap boyfriend of four years proposed. I was overwhelmed with emotion, since he bought such a huge, seemingly-diamond ring. I was later overwhelmed with emotion when my finger turned green. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend of five and a half years to family dinner at a restaurant. After we all had finished dessert, I got down on one knee, pulled out my great grandmother's ring and proposed. The entire restaurant was dead silent. She looked around and then slowly walked out. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 3 years. I checked the box with the ring to make sure it was still there, and saw a piece of paper in it. It said, "No." FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me in a beautiful park. It would have been perfect if it wasn't for some fat incel recording it on his phone, yelling about how much of a douche my boyfriend is, and how I'm such a "Stacy". FML
Today, I discovered that my father is getting married. Overjoyed and confused because I didn't know he was dating, I called him up to congratulate him, and ask who she was. Apparently, his soon to be fiancée is my mother-in-law. My wife is not happy. FML
Today, after three years with my dream girl, I decided to pop the question by making her complete a scavenger hunt ending in her finding me, suit and everything, by the park bench where we had our first kiss. She came home tired and, instead of following the clues, decided to watch TV all day. FML
Today, I was walking through my local park when I noticed a guy getting down on one knee with a ring box in hand. As I got closer, he looked at me, got a horrified expression on his face, and shouted, “Oh no, wrong woman!” He then awkwardly stood up, put the ring back in his pocket, and scuttled away. That's probably the closest I'll ever get to a proposal. FML
Today, after weeks of being engaged and with the wedding date planned, I finally told my parents. They told me it was my best April Fool's joke ever. I should've waited one more day. FML
Today, I planned to propose to my girlfriend in front of her family at dinner. I had the ring ready and got down on one knee. She immediately burst into laughter and said, "Are you kidding?" The family stared in silence, and I quickly realised she was just teasing me... until I stood up and knocked over an entire table of drinks. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by handing me a ring and saying, "Let's get this dumb shit over and done with." FML
Today, the waiter took the cake with the engagement ring to another table. By the time he'd figured out his mistake, the other couple had left, with the ring. I demanded the security footage, and the couple didn’t just get up and go, they full on snuck out, making sure no one saw them. FML
Today, despite knowing that I hate being the center of attention (and think that public proposals are stupid anyway), my boyfriend popped the question at a crowded hockey game. I threw up all over him, with thousands of people watching. FML
Today, my boyfriend of three years decided to propose. It would’ve been perfect, except he did it during my family’s annual backyard BBQ, and his proposal was drowned out by my drunk uncle singing karaoke. FML
Today, I was trying to propose to my girlfriend when some scumbag snatched the ring and bolted. I chased him down, tackled him, and punched him until he gave the ring back. Now my girl is upset, crying, "What if he was hungry and needed to buy food? You didn't have to hurt him." FML
Today, I was tasked with taking a photo of my best friend getting engaged. As her boyfriend got down on one knee, I got so nervous that I fumbled the camera. It landed right in the lake. I didn’t get a single picture, and now I owe them a new Canon EOS R10. FML
Today, my boyfriend "proposed" to me. When we first started dating, he told me that he hated the concept of marriage and absolutely never wanted to go through with it. So I laughed and turned him down, obviously thinking it was just a joke. He was serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend of four years proposed, and I said yes! Not even three hours later, I got a text message asking if we could just be friends instead. He won't tell me what changed, and doesn't feel like he owes me any explanation. FML
Today, I was finally about to propose to my girlfriend at a fancy restaurant. Just as I got down on one knee, the fire alarm went off and the entire restaurant had to evacuate. She thought I was joking, and now she’s mad at me for "messing with her emotions." FML
Today, I thought it would be romantic to propose to my girlfriend during halftime at a local football game. I arranged everything with the stadium staff. When the moment came, I got down on one knee, only for her to hiss, "Are you serious? Right here?" She ran off, leaving me kneeling in front of hundreds of people. FML
Today, I was walking through the park when I saw a guy getting down on one knee to propose. As I passed by, I gave a big thumbs up and loudly said, "You got this!" He was actually tying his shoe. No one else was actually even there with him. FML
Today, I wanted to ask my girlfriend to marry me, so as she loves crosswords, I created my own where the answers spelled out "MARRY ME EVE." Unfortunately, it seems I made the clues a bit too difficult as she only solved two, gave up, and got mad at me for making her feel dumb. FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. To this, she said, "You need to meet more people."FML
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