Childfree

Judging from the silent treatment, OP's girlfriend must have been upset about her infertility and the first thing that pops into his mind is typically sex.

If my be heard that he would be happy just for the fact my bc I use is the best my body can handle and it's still messes me up a lot so he would be happy for that but it's iffy I would be made at him too

#89 Have you ever heard of proof reading? You should try it sometime.

Good freaking lord I did not understand any of that. Work on englishing better.

I anything can't do right since, because, pickles.

Glad I'm not alone lol. I read it twice and still have no idea what they were trying to say lol.

Honestly, a lot of women want to have kids and being told they cannot has to be devastating. Getting excited when your girlfriend is told she is unable to have kids may be your honest reaction, but don't let it show. That is the last thing they need.

#89 was saying her boyfriend would be happy if she couldn't get pregnant because her birth control messes with her but that she would still be mad at him for enjoying it. It's not that hard to understand it if you have some common sense.

Sweet Jesus, what on earth is she trying to say!?!?!? Ugh, my head hurts so bad now!!

I think it's trying to communicate.

A translation for #89 (I speak fluent Engrish): If my boyfriend heard that he would be happy, if just for the fact that the birth control I use is the best my body can handle but it still really messes with me. So, he would be happy that I don't need the birth control, but I would probably still be mad at him for being happy about the situation.

I think I'll need to try the universal greeting to establish proper communication with #89. Bah-weep-graaaaagnah wheep ni ni bong

#190 if I could give you more than one upvote I would.. 'till all are one.

Thank you. We need more nonsense translators like you.

Autocorrect got the best of #89

..dude. You must have grown up around people who spoke English poorly or something. I can read various of things when poorly written. But I could not for the life of me understand a single word she wrote.

I live in Appalachia and didn't have a grammar class after seventh grade (until I got to college...hoo boy, that first semester of Honors English was tough). Once I learned how to English properly, I was hired as a writing tutor. Believe it or not, I saw worse cases than this when helping people with their papers.

And if it's a long term relationship, they really should discuss whether or not they want children. That's the kind of thing that can be a deal breaker for some people.

#19 even if they weren't wanting to have kids together it's still devastating for a woman to hear that she is infertile. I feel bad for the girlfriend she is probably extremely upset.

Yes, it's good to know you have a chance, even if you don't plan on using it.

I have girl friends that developed cysts early in life that have basically stripped them of their fertility. Honestly, OP, always be there for someone you care about enough to be in a relationship with. A first thought of happiness based off her learning that, obviously, isn't the best.

I'd get a vesectomy, but they won't let a 19 year old go through with the procedure. I've tried.

Agreed. To act joyous at all when someone has just found out there's something seriously wrong with their body is obnoxious.

I have pcos which is the number one cause of infertility in women. I don't want to have kids, but knowing that I probably can't is still a sore spot. I honestly cannot sympathize with op because when something like that happens you feel betrayed by your own body, and being betrayed by your boyfriend on top of that is awful.

The original poster isfemale

201- where are you seeing that? And how would that make any sense? Last I knew, a female can't get anyone else - male or female - pregnant.

My husband and I have debated whether or not to have kids the ten years we've been together. Being infertile would make me happy so I wouldn't have to decide. We could travel the world retire early and never truly know what we missed out on or didn't.

19, like other posters said, it's devastating that they don't have the option of changing their minds and having their own biological children.

244-- I totally understand that. I can't have children and I don't want children. Not being able to have children naturally is heartbreaking, especially as I get older. Even though I'm 95% sure I don't want children, when I hang out with my friends and their children, there is always a little twinge of regret and doubt. The boyfriend's reaction in this case is heartless and he deserves the silent treatment (at least). However, my point still stands. If a relationship reaches a certain point, the topic of children should be discussed. If I'm dating a man who wants children, we will eventually reach a point where either one of us will have to compromise what we want out of life or break up. It's much better to have that conversation sooner than later.

That's a good thing. When you're 19 you don't know what you want. Wear a condom and be responsible. Make a big decision like that later in your life.

I think that answers your question about whether or not to have kids...

I was just saying from my point of view being infertile wouldn't be so bad. I also have never felt that intense desire to have children, and for those people I truly feel sorry for. The OP could of seemed happy out of relief, I doubt he meant to be insensitive.

Some people are sure early, and I'll state up front people who always go "you'll change your mind" are dicks, plenty of people don't. BUT there's a reason doctors won't usually sterilise people until they're at least in their 30s - because some do change their minds. Learning you're infertile can be unpleasant even if you're 100% because the option to change your mind easily is gone. #194 - PCOS isn't a guarantee you can't, an awful lot still have kids with it with no assistance. So be aware! :)

Or 60 or 70 years... Okay, that's a bit severe lol. Seriously though, I would have flipped my shit if I were her. Even if you don't want kids it sucks hearing you're infertile because if you change your mind you're still screwed.

It's like doing community service

And then he gets dumped

Congratulations! :D

I love twins, but some turn 14 (or even younger) and become sets of assholes, especially if they're identical. Well congratulations, make sure you don't want to strangle them in the next 10 years.

"You're so selfish I know you don't want kids but I do and that's all that matters screw your opinion."

It's more about finding out that as a woman, your body can't function the way nature intended. She might not be thinking about getting pregnant anytime soon, but now that the option isn't there, she may feel like she failed as a woman. To have your partner act all excited about it would be heartbreaking.

#246 don't even try to turn it around as if OP is being mistreated. It's not like his girlfriend is forcing him to impregnate her jfc he literally jumped for joy at the announcement that she can never become a biological mother, he is a vile man. Who'd even want to have children with that man smh

Not everyone gets into relationships with the expectation of staying together forever and having children, especially if they're young. People do tend to expect the person they're in a relationship with to have a modicum of compassion for them though, that's the problem here.

He may not have even been thinking that far ahead. He may just have been thinking they never need condoms again.

Not everyone wants kids. She may not either but even without wanting them it can be a hard for someone to hear they're infertile. It's nice to have a choice even if you don't plan to use it

It's a shame that OP isn't the one who is infertile. She does deserve someone better.

Some people want kids but not as early as others or start out not wanting them but change their mind over time. Besides the fml never stated that he was genuinely happy or if he was that he wasn't trying to hide it. Maybe the girlfriend, in her grief, imagined this since she knew of the op's views on parenthood. Im not defending anyone just putting it out there that jumping to conclusions based on your personal experiences is not always the best.