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okay i am just going to further explain what happened.. I was driving a friend's car that has a custom safety feature, so whenever you close the driver's door, it automatically locks. I didn't know this at the time as my friend forgot to tell me. And yes, I did manage to get out you smart alecks, meaning someone finally drove by after an hour standing in the cold. I didn't want to break his window since the car cost a lot of money because it is custom all of the parts are hard to get.

By nopethanks - 31/10/2014 12:05 - United States - Eden Prairie

Today, I woke up really early to get ready for an interview. I guess it was too early because my mom thought someone broke into our house and now I have two bruised ribs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 947

You deserved it 2 775

Memory man

By Anonymous - 21/02/2017 04:00 - United States - Kennebunk

Today, my girlfriend and I were doing the dirty, when she told me to say her full name, including her middle name. I'd forgot her middle name. It was completely awkward after. I'm a dumbass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 805

You deserved it 3 342

By Anonymous - 14/07/2017 21:30 - Italy

Today, I got into an accident in my girlfriend's car. While I was in the emergency room, crying from the pain, she reassured me, "don't worry, you can pay me for the damage in several installments if you need to." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 969

You deserved it 1 467

Stuck

By Chub - 27/10/2009 04:45 - United States

Today, the door to my daughter's room became jammed and wouldn't open while she was in the room. Being resourceful, I grabbed my ladder and climbed up to her window, only to end up stuck in her window. I'm not sure what was worse, getting stuck, or being laughed at by my neighbors for a while. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 202

You deserved it 8 694

Hard shoulder

By me. - 11/07/2016 03:00 - United States - Norman

Today, I found out my mom has been telling my entire family I need surgery on my "Labia" instead of my "Labrum". I went from needing shoulder surgery to needing vagina surgery with one group text. Thanks, mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 784

You deserved it 747

By Feronia - 05/05/2015 21:00 - Netherlands - Goes

Today, the cops showed up at our door at 11 pm. Apparently, our neighbours thought I was being abused because they heard high-pitched screaming for 45 minutes straight. Little did they know our 6-month-old baby screams when she's happy. Loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 152

You deserved it 2 562

Feronia tells us more.

Feronia 12

Wednesday 6 May 2015 16:23

It's not that I'm mad at my neighbours for calling the cops, honestly I would've done the same. I'm just upset about officers barging in and handcuffing my boyfriend without explanation. They tried taking him out of the appartment, still handcuffed, still no explanation. Until I started yelling at them to let him go and tell me what the **** was going on they wouldn't give me a second glance. And yes, child protective services were called, and they showed up a bit later. They didn't fully believe me when I said my partner has never laid a finger on me, and they insisted on regular counseling. So now we have a counselor for an unknown amount of time, because they can't get it into their thick skulls that babies scream sometimes. And I live in constant fear, because if our daughter so much as scratches herself or bumps her head against the table we have a chance of losing her. Granted, a small chance, but a chance none the less. Also, our schedules are different from most people because of our job, we mostly live during the night, so it's normal for our kid to be up at 11pm. We're looking for other jobs to fix that.