Today, my husband and I were getting it on when we heard a little giggle. I put on my robe and looked outside my room to find that no one was there. So we continued. I later called my seven year old son and out he came crawling from under the bed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Mortified
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex while his parents were out. They came home early, ran upstairs, and knocked on the door. Scrambling to find our clothes, we gave up and just hid under the blankets. They barged in, drunk and laughing, and tried ripping the covers off. FML
Peek a boo
Today, my husband and I put our children to bed a little earlier than usual, so we could have some sexy time. Immediately following my full-blown orgasm, I rolled over, only to see my wide-eyed son peeking over the top of the mattress. FML
Scarred for life
Today, in the morning, my wife and I were having hot but silent sex on my futon while our 3 year-old slept in his crib. It was going great until my turn to come when I released a loud, "AARRGHHHHHH". My son promptly got up, took one look at me and his mother's back, then promptly went back to sleep without a word. FML
Alexa, play "Cannonball" by The Breeders
Today, I was getting frisky with my husband under the covers in bed. My son decided to run into our room and cannonball on top of my husband. This startled him, which caused him to bite me. FML
Today, the wife and I were in the middle of having sex. She was bent over and I was taking her to pound town. I look over to see my 3 year-old son standing in the doorway, humping air. FML
Boundaries
Today, my son climbed into our bed because he'd had a nightmare. He and my wife spent hours whispering and giggling like they were at a slumber party. Cute, until the next morning, when they were both tired, grumpy, and uncooperative. FML
Today, my husband and I were having sex. It was stormy outside, and when lightning flashed through the window, he screamed like a little girl and scrambled off the bed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I snuck into the bathroom together at his house for a quickie. Just as we unzipped our pants, his step-dad knocked on the door. Panicking, I jumped into the closet to hide. When his step-dad came in, he went to put some towels away. In the closet. FML
Buzzing the tower
Today, I was taking a shower when my husband suddenly came in naked. I thought we were gonna have some fun, and so tried to be sexy. He took a quick shower and left. FML
Today, I came home to find my husband and our 4-year-old son simultaneously peeing off the second-floor balcony. My husband was giggling like a little girl. FML
Top comments
phobiaoffears 0
He laughs now, but later on in life he'll definitely regret doing that.
insensitivity_ki 0
He is so going to smoke crack...
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Comments (167)
patray_angel 0
Kids can be hard to keep track of at times, but when it comes to having sex, the parents should definitely make sure they know where their kid is. I think 7 is a little too young to leave him alone doing whatever while you sneak away to go have sex. I don't think the kid will be scarred at all by this, because it doesn't sound like he knew what they were doing. As others mentioned, he just probably thought it was funny that his parents hadn't yet discovered he was there. During the day, parents should only have sex if their child is either taking a nap, at a friends house, or is no longer living at home.
likeduhhx4 0
well maybe you should write a book about when parents should have sex.
1234five 0
He's gonna tell allllll his friends
Cormophyte 0
YDI, for not securing the crotchfruit :P
DarthJeff 0
That's messed. Check on your kid before next time or get a babysitter.
shadowsx1101 0
Don't worry OP. Obviously your son loved the fact that he was hiding from you for so long, so he decided to let out a giggle to let you know where he is. But, you really should have checked everywhere before continuing your sexual activity. At least you can tell him all about it when he's older! =D
Guyoverhere 0
What a creeper
lifeislife_fml 0
There's been like...5 of these FML's this week where the kid witnesses the parents having sex.
wowfmlife 0
well #69 he obviously needs someone to keep an eye on him if hes sneaking under beds without the parents even taking notice
omgtayy 0
Hahahaa. If it makes you feel any better, when I was five, my parents woke me up when they were getting it on in the next room over. I got up, walked into their room, and they didn't realize I was there until I yelled, "MOMMY YOU MADE ME THINK THERE WERE PUPPIES IN HERE!!"
lakeylove 0
ughhh my mom leaves her thongs everywere