Today, my family of five and I decided to have homemade sushi. We did not prepare the fish correctly, and now we all have excruciating food poisoning. The worst part? We only have one bathroom. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my girlfriend and I both developed food poisoning from last night's sushi. Our apartment has one bathroom. FML
Today, my entire family, myself included, has been turned into a collective diarrhea fountain after going out to eat. We only have one bathroom. FML
Today, my husband and I are both suffering from food poisoning. He has horrible, raging, rank smelling, explosive diarrhea; I am vomiting every 15 minutes. We have one bathroom. FML
Today, I and several housemates have food poisoning. From what? Last night's Subway, which we only got to avoid eating the pork that was possibly bad as none of us wanted to be sick. FML
Today, I was hit by acute food poisoning while attending a colleague's birthday party at his home. The toilet had a door that wouldn't close all the way, there were only three sheets of toilet paper left, and I had to walk home through town, in a dress, with my soiled underwear in a plastic bag. FML
Today, I spent all day and last night in the bathroom. The seafood I'd been keeping in the refrigerator apparently had gone bad, and is now intent on finding its every possible route to the Great Porcelain Whirlpool. FML
The squits
Today, I got food poisoning from a restaurant that I had chosen for our company party. Everyone who went blamed me for their predicament. I also had to run to the toilet every ten minutes while they were all mad at me. FML
Two rooms, two atmospheres
Today, I tried to cook a nice meal for my sister's friends. It turned out perfect and they enjoyed it, while I was in the bathroom throwing up for two hours due to food poisoning. FML
All bunged up
Today, I’m at my hometown for the weekend and bought my entire family takeaway for lunch without knowing my mom had cooked. Later, after finding out, I promised to eat it for dinner. Guess who is having food poisoning but can’t shit. The cramps are killing me. FML
Today, I got food poisoning from my wedding food. FML
Top comments
SuperDerp 8
What a cool and original pun about food poisoning.... This has not been said on other food poisoning FMLs or anything....
mazzera_fml 7
Something fishy is going on.
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Comments (171)
kraz8 1
I'm sure you weren't preparing blowfish. Next time wash your hands before you prep food, Señorita Assfingers...
5t3ff1k4h 47
Um, who says their hands weren't washed? Food poisoning can happen for various reasons which INCLUDES but is not limited to hand-washing.
Leslier_fml 4
Hey, shit happens.
Jewbenita 0
Theres no "preparation" in sushi fish. You rinse it quick then put it on rice or a roll etc. But next time leave it to the japanese to make sushi, go to a sushi place.
lizlala 15
Don't really understand how sushi can be prepared "wrong" seeing as it's basically raw fish on rice... I've made sushi with my Japanese friends several times without any problems, and we just bought normal raw fish at the supermarket (in europe/japan). Maybe OP's fish was old/gone bad? (or is there something strange going on with the supermarket fish in the US that I don't know of..?) Hope you feel better soon OP. Food poisoning sucks :(
Keoaratr 9
What #111 said. There isn't much "preparing" the fish except for cutting it into right-sized pieces. If all of you are ill, it just means the fish you ate wasn't exactly "fresh", if you know what I mean.
edenbearrr 2
There's a yard for a reason....just kidding
Jasonf6 0
Dumbasses! :)
enokleo 1
dats bad
zombiibabii 4
I'm not gonna say YDI. I'm sure the good poisoning is enough to say that and then some. I just hope you leave the sushi making to chefs and those who specialize in it from now on. The fish has to be flash frozen and prepared a certain way to kill any bacteria, parasites, etc. That's why it's really just best to leave it to the pros.
alycion 39
I've seen many ads for classes on it at one if the culinary schools. I think if I were to take up trying to prepare something I was unsure of at home, I'd take the class. The ones I see are night/hobby type classes do you don't have to dedicate a lot of time to them. But you do learn safety techniques.
DONTxCARE 0
Pancakes are waaaay easier. And healthier too.
Romance_isdead 7
Dude seriously? I read this exact same FML 2 years ago -.-'